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The ex and I have been apart for two months. We were together for two years. Started arguing a lot at the end and broke up. It took me these two months to relize how much I loved him and wanted to get back together. Right after we broke up he started seeing someone else...that made me feel real good. I hadn't talked to him in about 3 weeks and he calls me Friday night comes over and wants to talk. He tells me him and the new girl is already getting on his nerves and the new girl has a 3 year old son and is going through a seperation and he dosen't know if he wants to deal with that. We end up spending the next 4 days together he tells me how much he missed me how all of his friends said that i was so much better fro him than the new woman and how his family kept asking about me. He then brakes things off with this girl just out of the blue. He was off work on Monday so he didn't see her. Tuesday I guess he sees her calls me up and says he still has feelings for her...they have only been together two months. He says that he dosen't know what he wants if it's me or her and that he just wants to be left alone. I asked if he told the other woman this and he said yes....i don't know and he sees her everyday. He told me to leave him alone and that he would call. We spent the best 4 days together and I just don't understand. Please Help

If you have been following my story we have been broken up for about two months now. He started seeing someone right after we broke up. We have stayed in some contact but not much. I guess it made it eaiser for me not to contact him knowing he was with someone else. By the way we were together two years. I called him ysterday morning just to say Hi and see how he was doing...he said he wanted to be friends. He called me last night and we were talking and he asked if he could stop by. I said fine and we just talked for awhile. He was telling me how the new woman was getting on his nerves and all kinds of other stuff. Well one thing lead to another and we ended up sleeping with each other and he spent the night. He told me how much he missed this and would talk about what he missed about our relationship. I don't want to get my hopes up becasue i know he is with this other woman becasue we talked about it. He really didn't seem happy about their relationship but we didn't talk about it much. I told him he could talk to me about becasue I was ther for him. He left this morning and said that he would call me later in the week. I just don't know what to think. I don't want to get my heart ripped out agian. Any advice please

Me and my ex boyfriend broke up a month ago. Within the first week we were broken up he was seeing someone else. This women is older and has a child and this is so out of the ordinary for him. I just don't understand how you can be in a relationship for two years and then break up and one week be back into another relationship. He says it isn't serious but i thnik it is. She is always at his house and i had to stop by to pick my stuff up and he had a picture of the little boy on his coffee table. The odd thing is he calls me last week says he misses me and all kinds of other stuff. He said the new girl was mad becasue he still had a picture of me up in his bedroom...don't know if this is true or not. He wants to be friends but if he is already in this new serious relationship that won't work. he hasn't even had time to get over our two year relationship. I just don't understand. Do you think this is a rebound and will it work. the woman he is now dating has had a thing for him for a while. He would tell me this becasue she worked in a bank where he would pick up money and she was always flirting with him. I feel like he just jumped into a relationship with her becasue someone was showing him some interest. I can only hope and pray this is a rebound and won't work becasue he hasn't had time to get over me. Advice needed please

Okay I have been doing the no contact for about two weeks. Before this calling and begging and pleading all that stuff. He has called me twice in these two weeks since I started no contact to see how I was doing??? He calls yesterday asking if I want to stop by and tells me that he misses me and that he misses me sexually. By the way he is seeing someone else. I ask how that is going and he says okay tells me she is pissed off becasue he still has a picture of me up. H e keeps telling me how much he misses sex with me and all this stuff so I ask what should we do. He says that he is taking this time to get closer to his family and that I should do that and that for now we should live our separate lives. I am so scared that I will never have a second chance with him. That he will find someone else and fall in love with her and that's it. He wants to remain friends something that he has not done with any other ex and still hasn't picked up his stuff from my house. Do you think that there is any chance. we broke up becasue of arguing and he said I was making his lif eto stressful. we have only been apart for a month .

Does the no contact really work. Do you need to tell your x that you will not be contacting them or do you just start and see what happens. We brok up a month ago a lot of fighting and stuff. We did not communicate well. One week after we broke he was with someone else. The whole time we were together he said he would never date anyone he works with becasue they were always hitting on him....guess what he is now dating someone he works with. This puts thoughts in my mind as if they had something going on before we broke up. The day after we broke up we met to talk and said that he had shut his feelings and emotions down for me he loved but was not in love....by the way the day before this he told me he loved and then we broke up. Another thing we would argue about was that he never wanted to go out and do anything as soon as we break up he is out all of the time. I did the whole crying and pleading and begging thing so he knows I want him back. I decided two weeks ago to start the no contact. before this I was always calling him and he never once called me until last week. I didn't answer becasue I was going to be strong and proceed with no contact. He left a message about picking his stuff up. He said he couldn't pick it up until he had his deck built...he left a hammock at my house....that is the only thing that would go on his deck he also left a computer and a bunch of other stuff. I don't see why he just dosen't come and pick it all up. My friends say it is a way to leave the door open if the other girl dosen't work out. If he cheated on me I don't want him back. I feel like if I don't contact him he will never contact me. What should I do

I broke up with my boyfriend 12 days ago. After I did it I regretted it so much. We had been arguing a lot over stupid stuff and I just couldn't take it anymore. I realize now that we should of talked about things between us sooner. We have threatened each other before with breaking up but never did it. The day after the break up we sat down and talked becasue I wanted him back so bad. He said that he had shut his feelings and emotions down for me He loved me but was not in love with me. We then proceeded to have sex that evening...... so many mixed signals. I tried the no contact rule but couldn't do it. We decided to be friends and are sopouse to sit down and talk on how this will work. I get the feeling that when I call him that I am bothering him but he is saying that he just wants to distance himself. He also says that he has never been friends with an x before ......i am just wondering why he wants to stay friends with me. I want to stay friends with him becasue I am still deeply in love with him. He has some items at my house and i asked him when he was going to get them... he acted like no big deal. My friends say this is a way for him to keep a door open to get back in my life and by staying friends. If this is true why can't we just work out our problems and be together. I feel that I have taken responsibility for my failing part of the relationship. He said that I was verbally abusive to him so I have decided to take some anger management classes. He says that maybe down the road we can get back together but not for now. Should I stay friends with him and or should i give myself some space to get over him.

Me and my boyfriend had been arguing a lot and I finally had said I am done. The next day I regreeted it so much and wanted him back. We talked the next day and he said he ahd shut down and truned his feelings and emotions off for me. I don't see how this is possibly becasue even though i was angry with him I still love him deeply and have feelings and emotions for. How does someone just turn feelings and emotions off.

I just want to thank everyone for the advice. It has helped a lot. I am still stuck with the being friends after a break up. I broke up with him.... alot of arguing in our relationship. I regretted it the day after and wanted him back so bad. He didn't want to get back together but wants to be friends. We have talked about this. He is my first love and it is so hard to let go.... I think that I would like to have him as a friend becasue I can't stand to think of him not in my life. I just don't undertand if he wants to be friends so bad why can we not just get back together. I have never been friends with any other X and neither has he. He made the comment that we had a different type of relationship from every other one that he has had. He said that I verbally abused him in the relationship and I guess he just dosen't want that form me anymore. We have only been apart about a week now and I realized so much about myself and the way I treated him. I feel so bad for treating him that way. I guess I just need to know should I remain friends or is going to be to hard.

I just talked to my ex and it was friendly conversation actually it was about dropping off some papers to him. I called him becasue I need to give these back to him. we hav been in contact after the break up but I have read the no contact but that seems so hard. I just called him back and left a message saying that I need to know if I should just let go or is there a chance that we will get back together. I am willing to try the no contact but I don't want that to backfire and have him never get in touch with me again. He wants to be friends and of course I want that to keep him in my life but sometimes I think I am kidding myself that we will get back together. I want to be more than friends so that is hard. I am willing to do what it takes.

I have learned so much from this site I am so glad it is here. Just wanted some insight on my situation. My boyfirend and I broke up last Thursday my Birthday. What a birthday present. We had been arguing alot and he didn't want to take me out on my Birthday becasue he was to tired but he could have his friends over instead. Well this set me off and with all the arguing and stuff going on I just got all his stuff from my house took to his and said I am done. The next day I regretted it so much. It was out of anger that I did it. I tried to talk to him that evening and piece things back together but he said that he had shut down and turned his feelings off for me. He said that he loved me but was not in love with me and wanted to remain friends and that he needed space. Last night he stopped by to sign his taxes....I did them for him. He stayed for a while and watched T.V and we talked not about our relationship or anything just chit chat. I brought up the fact that he had some stuff at my house like a computer and abunch of other stuff that he needed to get. He just said Ah like no big deal I am in no hurry to get my stuff. What kind of signal is this. I have decided to do the no contact becuase he know s that I want him back but I don't want him to think that I am just sitting around waiting for him.

I told him how I was feeling and he said that he needed his space and that he loves me but is not in love with me. Should I see this as an end to the relatinship or think that maybe some where down the road we will get back together. All I can think is at least he still wants to be friends and still talks to me on the phone. Should I just let go or hope that things will eventually work out.

I broke up with my boyfriend 5 days ago. I think that I made the biggest mistake of my life. We had been arguing alot and alot of it was my fault and he thinks that i was making his life to stressful. He says that he still wants to friends but it is so hard. I have spoken to him everyday since we broke up. I want to be friends with him. Actually being away from him has made me realize how great he was and how much I love him. Should I do the no contact and see what comes of that. Please Help