Chibby33

Ok, my fiance packed and left about a month ago. We lived together for a year and a half and it was emotionally draining because for the smallest issues, he sulks and doesnt speak to me for a whole day. He doesnt make much (BIG mistake for moving out!), lived in my house but not once did I ever mention about money. He would buy new shirts and ties for himself but never offered to pay one bill. He doesnt help out with chores at all either. These past few weeks were absolute torture because since he left he couldnt give me a straight answer if he's coming back or not. He visited me once to introduce his brother from Egypt (what for?) and said he misses me. Face to face I asked him "yes or no" if he's coming back and he said "I need to think about it." He called and sent me text messages asking where I was at, how my weekend was, etc. I NEVER RESPONDED BACK! Well a few days ago he called and I simply asked him what his intentions were. He flatly said it's over between us and he really wanted us to be friends. STOP!! I told him sorry but I cannot offer my friendship, good luck, let's not communicate again. Well that night he called and asked if I really dont want to be friends - I declined again - he said he still loves me but it's not working out (so why are you still calling me?). He sent another text after the phone call thanking me for all the support and help I have given him. Here was my response: You're welcome and no problem because we were responsible for each other. Although I am extremely sad that I lost the man I love, at the end of the day I look around at what I have (house, car, family, friends, excellent job) and well I really didnt lose anything but perhaps gained peace. Yes I am sad but with everything else, this too shall pass. I hope you find your happiness with someone down at your level. Take care. Nice huh? I am now done analyzing every phone call and text he made after he left. I choose to be happy now.

It is very difficult when he still comes into the pictiure. The last thing my ex told me when he left was "I LOVE YOU". Everytime we talk on the phone, he cries. THere are many elements that makes me so confused. A week after he left, he came with his brother. He said his brother wanted to meet me - what the heck?? Then he said he came over because he misses me. But then he wouldnt call everyday which I understand because he is trying to fix many of his other issues with family and work. I went to his work just to get an answer and he said "I'll need to think about it" and when i asked him yes or no, he couldnt say. Then lately when he calls, he calls me "honey" just like before. Then when i went to NY, he wanted me to let him know if i got there safe and when i didnt he sent me a text "where you at??". CONFUSED and HURTING!! What's your take on this??

Yes!! Together we can pull each other out of this mess. Time is all we need to heal. We will recover and come out strong - everyone else does. Keep talking about it and soon we will all look back and laugh at it. But for now, darn it really hurts!

Blaine, we will be your support. We will all cry to each other until the pain goes away. Everyone says it will pass, but the road to recovery really hurts. You feel numb and your chest is about to explode. CRY!! Cry as much as you can, and while you're crying shout out how you really feel about the breakup and everything else you wanted to tell him. SHOUT if you need to. Do not let it all inside - i cried like a baby so many days and it's harder because when he calls, it takes me 2 steps back and start hurting again because i dont know if he wants to come back or not. BE ANGRY if you have to.

Blaine, I am in the exact situation and it will also be a month on the 23rd since he left. He's been in my mind 24 hours even in my dreams. What's harder for me is that he has not really given a definite end to our relationship. He's still wishy-washy about it. DO NOT CALL! Let him wonder about you. That's what I did and he started to call. It's hard to let go and all that you and I are holding on is hope and strength. Good luck - let me know if you need a shoulder to cry on because we're both dealing with the same issues. Take care.

Thanks Annie. He did say he needs to think about it so i dont want to bug him anymore. Its just so hard when things are still up in the air.

You and I are in the same situation TLC. It's been 3 weeks and it hurts to breathe. Best advice is to not communicate with him - TIME AND SPACE. In the beginning i called my ex everyday asking him to come back then one day it just stopped. Next day he sent me a text - i responded after 6 hours, very short response. Next day, he called and left a message that he wanted to talk. I didnt call back but he did and we talked for an hour. Nothing was resolved but at least he made the move. Trust me one full day of not hearing from you will make him wonder.

My fiance and i lived together for 1.5 years. Adjustment period came and 3 weeks ago, we had an argument and tempers flew. He was having issues with his brother, work, etc, couldnt handle it so he packed and left. Last thing he said was "I Love You". He couldve stayed in NY where his cousin is but he said he's returning to MD to be around me. Here's the thing. He couldnt decide if we're over or not. He said he needs to think about it and focus on cleaning up his life. Understood. Well 2 weeks ago he visited me and brought his brother to meet me. He said he came over becuase he misses me. What the heck?? Also when i stopped callng him, he started calling me at night and wanting to talk about what he's been doing, he still cries about the break-up, etc. Then he calls me "honey" and "sweety". He's also asking who i've been talkng to and where i'm at. OK men, tell me what the deal is with this person. WHAT DOES HE WANT?? If i cant get it out of him, can anyone provide me with some insight??