Miahni

Hi thedude, Can you explain how you define a rational gut feeling and an irrational gut check? Thanks, Mahni

Hi Natalie, What is the gut feeling that you are getting on your bf? Miahni

Thanks Juha, Yes, one would assume that activity likely happened.... but it worked out I guess.... I guess it depends on how comfortable one would be being with someone so long then breaking up and then within a short time being wtih somebody else and sleeping with them and then getting back together with the first person...some may view that as a deal breaker that if things happened in between that time apart (sleeping together) that that's it. Miahni

Jigsaw and Juha, These people that got back together who were seeing others during the time apart - did any of them move in or sleep with the persons they were seeing in that time apart? Miahni

Hi Chris, Just curious, how are you going to prove to her that you won't be doing those kinds of things to her again? Miahni

Thanks for remembering my Birthday Natalie!!!!! Your positive thoughts helped! I was soo nervous meeting him, I've never been this nervous, not even when we first started dating. Anyways it was a bit "awkward" in the beginning...small talk and I couldn't really read him, he was being a bit distant. I couldn't eat much that's for sure!!!! Anyway, we had a good talk ..... and yes, they do miss you even if they were with someone else, they do think about you and being with that someone else makes them think of the things they miss in you... I hope your situation works out Natalie...

Ok, getting really really nervous now.... The talk is tomorrow and I really don't want to get hurt any more...I'm afraid to hear any bad news...for ex. "I'm living with a girl"...the one that pursued him...arrgh! Are guys oblivious to special days? People normally don't agree to "talk" on the other person's birthday if they are going to be telling them bad news right???? Are there people who do that on purpose to get the point accross to the other person there is no hope? Going Nuts! Miahni

Did your ex do anything / say anything for your birthday Natedoggold182? Well I suggested the restaurant to him and he knows the significance of it being "our" restaurant, so he could have easily suggested another place if he didn't think it was a good idea - do you think? And why would he mention my birthday last night and then say it's really up to me which day I want today when I ask him? I hope he isn't going to say things that will hurt me even more - are people that cruel to do it on someone's birthday? He could have suggested another day right? ARGH I'm so scared. I don't want to get hurt anymore.

Ok, I just asked him when he wanted to meet instead of waiting for him to possibly ask for Fri... we are supposed to have a talk... He said when are you free (I was disappointed he didn't say Fri since he was asking about it last night) So I said "you were asking about Friday?" He said "if you weren't too busy" He knows Friday is my birthday... I said is that the day you wanted and he said it's up to you really and asked where I wanted to meet. So I said the restaurant that we always went to for our celebration of our monthly anniversary. I said because it's quiet and not usually that busy And he said ok, we can do that. So it's on my birthday at "our" restaurant... Is this good????? There is still a girl that is living at his place...so could he be so cruel to hurt me on my special day and our restaurant??? He knows the meaning behind them.. Any thoughts???? Thanks! Miahni

What did you ask your ex Nataliejulie?

Hello all, my ex of 6 years msn'ed me last night (we have been msn'ing, talking, and we are supposed to get together for a talk soon) and asked how things were with me and I asked him what about him and he said he just got home from work and was going to play his game and then we chatted about his game for a bit. Then he asks: Ex: What are you doing Friday? Me: nothing that I am aware of why Ex: It's your b-day and I was wondering Ex again: Not going anywhere? Me: no, no plans Ex: ok, will talk to you later What are your opinions of this? He is living with another girl I suspect a couple of weeks after he broke up with me. It's been 3 months since we broke up and it really hurts that she moved in so quickly as me and my ex never lived together. We are supposed to have a talk soon, but no plans have been made. Do you think he was planning to talk to me on my b-day? And break my heart even more?????? Because it didn't really make sense for him to mention one week in advance about my birthday when he knows any little thing would give me hope. If he wanted to wish me happy birthday, he could have wished it on the actual day or asked what my plans were on that day if he wasn't going to do anything with me.... what is everybody's thoughts on this???? Had any other dumper done this with their ex or is he screwing with my mind?? Since we are supposed to talk, should I just ask him then when he wants to talk instead of waiting for the possibility that he wanted to talk Fri? I figure if he wanted to do something with me on my birthday, why didn't he ask in the conversation then??? Or is he planning to ask later? ARGH! Thanks, Miahni

Hi all, Does anyone know what it means when you keep dreaming (more like having nightmares) of your ex being with the girl that you think he is with???? Miahni

Hi Angelxo5, Do you mind saying what led to the break up? Were you two fighting a lot etc.? How long were you together? Do you know if he was seeing anyone else during the time apart? Did you eventually get back together with him? Reason I ask is my fiance and I were together for 6 years and then he met someone at work that pursued him and he told me he was done and he didn't want to work on things and that he wasn't happy with me and that he's moved on. But I feel deep down he loves me because how can that change in a few weeks??? Thanks, Miahni

Hi Adelle, I am in this situation as well with my ex of 6 years. He "lost" his love for me. I think partly due to depression after his grandmother passed away (he was extremely close to her, she was his guidance in life) and then us having a fight and him meeting someone the next day (which he feels is a sign that it's meant to be). I totally agree with you about the being in love feeling ebbing and flowing in a relationship through time. Whatever life events are happening affects the state of the love in the relationship, but I believe if you truly love someone, you would stick it out through the tough times and work on things. I wish I could explain that to him, but he's spritual so he thinks that when that loving feeling leaves, it's time to go, because the lesson with the person is learnt. ARRRRGGGH! Anyway, I was wondering how you are letting your ex know how you still feel in a non-threatening way. I would like to do that as well as I want him to know how much he means to me, except I definitely don't want him to think I am pressuring him because he will get upset and also I'm not sure if this would be a good idea if there is someone else in the picture? Any ideas? Thanks, Miahni

Hi Yo, I can tell you that I am in a sort of similar situation. My bf of 6 years and I were rather opposite, however, I think that was great in that we complemented each other's strengths and weaknesses and helped each other grow. Then he met somebody at work who he feels is his soulmate and dumped me as he feels they are more compatible. (The girl pursued him and fed his ego and he fell for it...part of me feels like she got interested in whatever he was interested in and I hope someday he realizes the truth and his mistake). Somebody once said to me, that you can't grow in somebody's shadow if you are too similar. But I've been wondering this as well to see the likelihood of us getting bak together...so I wish you luck in your situation. Miahni