Blue53
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I am so sorry for your pain. He did not deserve your devotion or love is how I would look at it. Remember that there are those out there looking for a love like yours. Maybe after you lose this creep, you will find them. Stay Strong!!
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I love my husband but am in love with another man...
Blue53 replied to aprillynnn's topic in Infidelity
Choose, but choose wisely!! I am just getting over my first emotional affair, so I know how somewhat how you feel. The butterflies and closeness are like a drug addiction. What I did was realize that if I leave my marriage to follow my passion, my new partner would always have in the back of their mind that I would leave them. Plus I would hurt my current partner. Way your pros and cons. Better to feel good knowing that someone felt this way about you, and you didn't pursue them. It is always a good feeling to be loved, even if you cannot follow that love. Blue53 -
Is was an emotional affair. She is avoiding me, which is fine by me. If we continue to act like this not sure what will happen. I figured if I see her with mutual friends I should speak and let her be the prud!! You know be happy.
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It's kind of messy. I initated the breakup, but after that she sends me an email telling me not to contact her. So that's why. But we still have the same friends. Like today, she was walking by with her boss and her boss spoke to me and I replied to him. I ignored her. It was weird because we were always joking and talking before NC.
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I have begun NC with a friend. But we still have some mutual friends. If I have run into her with other people around, what's the best way to handle? Do I make her speak(just hello) or just ignore her? I have been ignoring her but it is very arkward. Suggestions, comments!!
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I agree with darkblue on this one. The best way to get her back is to act like you don't care. Drives them wild. Rent the movie 'Swingers" and watch it. Let her be the one that calls you. You could be smothering her with affection. That could be why she wants to be friends. Back off!! It's the hardest thing to do, but it will work. Give her some space and work on maybe getting another girl.
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I've found the best way to get over these things is to channel a bit of that heat you felt for the interloper and reinvest it in your spouse. Maybe rent a fireman's uniform and do a sexy little dance in Mrs. Blue53's honor? Actually smallworld, it has already started. My SO has responded to the hand-holding and hugs that I gave to another. The girl that I see at work is really mad at me, had to force her to say "hello". I figure the best way to combat that is to be kind, but distant. That should work. We know that what we did was wrong between us. But she must have a grudge. Emotional affairs are deep. Might take some time to heal. She lost a friend to confide and talk to. Any ladies out there can give me a woman's pespective on girlfriends feelings after we went into NC mode? I will have to be in limited contact with her in the future. What's the best way to handle future contact? Thanks Blue53
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Someone please help me i dont know what to do
Blue53 replied to gregsgal78's topic in Relationship Advice
Not sure , but he could be generating these arguments because he is having an affair and wants out of the marriage. I don't think I would rock the boat, but I would think if his behaviour has been strange lately. Not enough info to go on but you should act natural and maybe do some snooping around. Very sorry for you!! -
Thanks smallworld for the encouraging post!! I ended it although it wasn't easy. I probably would have acted on my feelings with her and screwed everyone's life up. Actually it ended because of a small spat which was ok. I have deceided that women that even flirt with married men have other emotional issues like low self-esteem and desperation problems. That brings in pity. I felt sorry for her and thats how things got started. Even though my marriage isn't perfect and I have some issues I need to deal with, my wife has been there for me. That by itself is worth more than any affair! Thanks everyone
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This just happened 4/20 and I haven't seen her since. I needed some time to sort out my feelings. I have talked to her on the phone, but I need to think this out. I thank everyone for your candid answers!
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Actually I had business that required me to contact this girl. I had to install some computer equipment . That was when I began to feel something for her. I was wrong by making any type of gesture. I haven't lied to the wife because I have to see her for business.
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Emotional cheating is worst than physical cheating? Maybe I should have had sex first and then held her hand!!
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If a married man and friend that is a girl, hold hands is this cheating? Just kind of fell into this thing where this girl held my hand when offered and said is was mutual. She knew I was married and I asked her go for a motorcycle ride with me. She accepted. During the ride, I reached back and grabbed her hand. I guess this is emotional cheating, but I have strong feelings for this girl. Never had an affair, but emotions are all screwed up now. Could we be just friends? Suggestions???