SuperDave71

Goingforit_77, Hey... The fact she is on "Facebook" is NOT the issues whatsoever....I personally cannot stand MySpace and Facebook....and how I have seen people get allll worked up because they are NOT one someone's "friend" list. WHO CARES!! If she needs space...GIVE IT TO HER. IF she wants a break...GIVE IT TO HER. WHat is difficult about this? If someone said..."Pick up the pen on the desk to write with. It's right in front of you" and you asked What do I write with and where is it?" ..Would basically tell ANYONE..you were NOT listening OR you only wanted to hear what you wanted to hear. "I need space" does NOT mean..call me all the time...IM me all the time.. come over unannounced all ya want and please text me. NOOO NOOO NOOOOO! I she needs space the LAST thing you need to do is CONTACT HER! I you truly love her..you will listen to her...if not..Go ahead and obsess and push her away completely. Don't say I didn't warn you.. Be careful. SuperDave71

Thank you soo much TJ, I wish you the best....if you take ANYTHING away from all of this... Take the knowledge you learned and pass it on to someone else that needs it... Take care my friend, SuperDave71

Tijuana, I am so scared for you. 19 days...19 days of what? 19 days is two weeks and 5 days which breaks down to: 456 hours.. What have you learned? To communicate? What was the issue? Why didn't you guys just talk before? I wish you the best....I seriously do BUT I feel in your case... Nothing has been resolved... sure you got her back...but THE goal is not to be in love...its to STAY in love... Make sense? Communication is HUGE! I wish you could have been a bit stronger in this. I feel like you guys are going to jump in the pool before checking for water. AGAIN, PLEASE I wish you the BEST.... I have seen this sort of thing over and over...take care and I hoe you will ALWAYS fiind what you are looking for my friend. Good Luck and God Bless, -SuperDave71

Good Afternoon Everyone, I do NOT wanna hear PITY PARTIES IN HERE.... This post is for getting better...NOT FALLING BACKARDS. Pisces, We know you miss him...you must realize that he may NOT come back. Because of your low self-esteem and feeling of self-worth has been hit pretty hard.. THIS DOES NOT mean you are worthless. You may FEEL this way..but it is FAR from the truth..STOP PUTTING YOUR SELF WORTH INTO YOUR EX..for GOODNESS SAKE.... Go stand in the mirror adnd tell yoru self over and over.."I AM SOMEONE'S TREASURE!!" "I MATTER"..."I AM VALUED AS A PERSON, FRIEND, AND LOVER..I DESERVE BETTER!!" You have GOT to snap out of this NON-SENSE. One day you will look back on this and say "WHAT IN THE WORLD WAS I THINKING!!!" YOu can DO THIS!!! and do it today!!! -SuperDave71

Alltornup, Good morning and one major obstacle down ....good for you! I am glad you told the boys. I am sure this will help on your trip as well. I hope you have a great time..all of you. As for the blocking and deleting the number...etc etc.. You do what you want. Deleting someone DOESN'T mean anything. I will help you NOT to see that she is online. My answer is, if you don't want to know if she is online or not....delete it. As for the number, you do what you feel is necessary for you to move on. You can do it! -SuperDave71

I am sure its painful. I am sorry you are hurting. I really am. Sometimes the very things we want the most, turn out they are bad for us. ( PUT THAT DOUBLE FUDGE BROWNIE DOWN!!!! DOH! -SuperDave71

Hey there... Welcome to eNotAlone! I think you are looking to hard at the statement above. If someone told me, let's see what happens in a couple of months.... That BOLD statement would let me know one of two things: 1.) They assume I will be around in a few months 2.) They assume that they can still contact and see me It really depends on your situation. I would chalk it up as, he want you gone. My reasoning is, if he comes back later....you are surprised. If he doesn't, you would have already started mving on. Good luck to you! -SuperDave71

Regular..I am sure the men's version would be good as well. -SuperDave71

marriage....i know your not married but the advice is great! -SuperDave71

It takes time Goodwaves... You have to make a positive decision to get through this. You can do it ! -SuperDave71

Onlittleladybug, Of course I did....I am human It was sooooooo hard NOT to have those feelings. I don't care what ANYONE says...True love does not JUST end....it is not a light switch. People do NOT just go from HOT to COLD because they "Fell out of love with you". The phrase "Fell out of love" to me is like saying you ALMOST fell UP a cliff instead of OFF one. It doesn't make sense. Do feelings change..ABSOLUTELY. One question that I asked myself" "Did she fall out of 'love' with me...or did she just stop showing me the attention that I assumed was love or loving." If you look up at the sky...and you KNOW it's blue. Then someone comes along that you admire and look up to or ya just want to impress them a bit. They disagree with ya...they say the sky is gray or even yellow. Now this is funny becauseyou KNOW the sky is Blue...you are 100% certain. They still see it as yellow. You might change your answer to a Bluish yellow.... They disagree....you say where you can understand where they see that it is yellow....BUT you KNOW FOR SURE its blue. WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD YOU CHANGE YOUR ANSWER???!! THAT is exactly my point when it comes to "Falling out of love"....you NEVER fall out of love. What happens is that the love you once had made NOT be as intense but you NEVER just STOP. In the Bible it says: 1st Corinthians 13:10 "B ut when the perfect comes, the partial will be done away" (Sorry about the religion folks) I agree with the above verse VERY strongly. how many of you have been "In love"...it was WONDERFUL....then ya breakup. Then whatever amount of time passes you meet someone that WAAAAAAAAY exceeds ANYTHING you have ever had SO FAR. Make sense? I learned to love me. Romantic feelings came and went....they haunted me daily UNTIL I LET THEM GO. How are those feelings helping me? How can I benefit from feeling something THAT WANT THERE ANYMORE? I wasn't. I had to let them go. It was NOT until I did...that i was truly free. -SuperDave71

BTW....a book will NOT teach you how to get your lover back... Good luck! -SuperDave71

Gary Chapman's = THe Five Love Languages Excellent read! -SuperDave71

Ahhhhh2jz, KEEP IT UP!! and as for PINKBUNNIE! I will come over there and duct tape you to the floor while luvmykids thows half-eatten twinkies at your head. YOU CAN DO THIS!!!! -SuperDave71

PINKBUNNIE!! DON'T MAKE ME COME OVER THERE YOUNG LADY!!!!! *sigh* -SuperDave71

I agree luvmykids.. -SuperDave71

I agree 100% with Robowarrior. -SuperDave71

Leo, If she refuses to let you go and you have already broken up with her... This is NOT your issue but hers. -SuperDave71

Finalcloud, I do NOT believe in friends right after a breakup. You are you trying to fool? It takes time to heal affter such a blow and disapointment. After a few months have passed, and you are stronger....it is possible to rekindle a friendship. Good Luck to you, -SuperDave71

Sad, You you were a talker and not motivated to SHOW her how much you loved her? Let me ask you, did you assume she would stay with you just because of the time you spent? Did you ever listen to her when she told you what she wanted or expected of you? I hope she was not a "he just doesn't get it" kinda gal. Please let me know. -SuperDave71

Alltornup, DON'T EVER EVER EVER EVER cry in front of an ex IF YOU CAN HUMANLY HELP IT!!! PLEEEEEEEEASE trust me on this one. Crying only twists the knife your ex MAY BE feeling in her side for hurting you already. You would NOT be crying in front of your children because she will no longer be there...you would be crying because she is GONE FROM YOU ALL....PERIOD. You really need to get a grip on your situation especially for your kids. You must have known that when you started dating and the MOMENT you let her move in, that you MIGHT have to deal with this in the future. You need to be STRONG for your KIDS!! NO EXCEPTIONS. I know it may be hard on them, but it will present itself soon regardless WHEN you tell them. As far as the "opportunity to say good-bye", is she dead, or moving to another state? This is a dramtic statement for you, NOT them. Your children will love her no matter what. I am certain they will miss her and God love them. The fact stands you need to be a MAN and SUPER DAD...when this happens. Telling your kids has nothing to do with your post. It's the PANIC factor that is setting in because you know when you leave tomorrow, she will be GONE when you get back. THAT is the issue here. You are not thinking clearly on this. She already said, we can have dinner with the children when you get back. She is making an effort..small or not. You are making this harder than it is my friend. I know you will miss her, I know she will miss you but you have to realize that she is OUT OF YOUR HOUSE WHEN YOU GET BACK. If you love her as much as you SAY you do....Take alllll that love and SMOOTHER YOUR KIDS WITH IT!!! SMILE WITH YOUR CHILDREN and BE THANKFUL YOU HAVE LOVING KIDS AND THAT THEY HAVE A GREAT DAD!! THIS IS NOT ABOUT YOUR EX...THIS IS ABOUT YOU GROWING...AND LEARNING TO DEAL WITH A SITUATION YOU HAVE NO CONTROL OVER. I wish you the best. I seriously do. Let go of yoru drama and fear... Just let go... -SuperDave71

SadOldMan, Hey there. I am so sorry for your pain my friend. Let me give you some advice: 1.) People do NOT LIKE "talkers".."I've changed".."I will do better".."I will never do that again" 2.) BE a "DOER" (Way to go pisces!) 3.) We always tend to relish in the "Don't know what you've got til it's gone" syndrome. Try not to dwell on this. 4.) YOU yourself cannot FIX her broken heart. There had to have been something that happened or occurred that you closed off to her. Why? What happened? Did she do something or NOT do something you needed to be valiadated? Give us a tad more informations please.. We will be happy to try and help... -SuperDave71

Pisces, I did see my ex while we were broken up in the beginning because I wanted her back so badly...then I stopped I kept NC for a loooong time... -SuperDave71

By the way... My ex came to me....she knocked on my door and I opened it. I had no idea it was her. She said I wouldn't answer her calls so this was the only way she could get me to talk to her. She made the effort....and she KEPT doing it. Her actions spoke louder than any words.... -SuperDave71

Pisces, We were apart for almost 2 years -SuperDave71