Does weight matter?

[PLC]

Helllo all,

 

I started to date a guy. We went out for 2 times. He seems a good guy but he is twice my weight. I'm just 5ft 3 in/95lb and he is 6ft 1 in/212lb. I feel somehow uncomfortable to walk on the street with him. Does weight matter in a relation? I need your opinion on this matter.

Thanks,

PLC

[EvaGina]

This is just my experience, but I dont think he is right for you.

I find that when you are with someone you shoud be with, you are proud of them no matter what they look like.

 

My ex was the best looking man I have ever seen in the flesh (not exaggerating) but I was still all werid iwth him in public, becuase we werent compatible.

 

So, although i think it is totally nasty and shallow to dismiss someone becuase of their weight, imo, you would find somthing else about htem to be embarrassed of if it wasnt his 212lb

[CarnelianButterfly]

My friend and her husband are 5'2" 110ish and he's 6'3" 240. They are happily married because their personalities are good for each other, not because the fit like lego blocks.

[Hope75]

My mom is 5'3" and about 130lbs, and my dad is 6'8" and 280lbs. They've been married for 36 years and are still happy. I don't think that height and weight matters, at least not for them.

 

How important is it to you what other people that don't know you think about your differences?

[rocio]

what matters is that you're attracted to him and he's attracted to you. you might think that people in the street care about your size difference, but honestly there are a million things that any given person cares about more than that.

[sophie274]

It's a bit hard to tell from your post - are you ashamed of his weight or something similar, or do you just think you two make an odd couple?

 

I'm a lot shorter than my boyfriend (by 8 inches) - and at first it was a bit weird hanging around someone so much taller than me, but I got used to it. And I love his strong build. My aunt and uncle are oddly matched (she is 5 foot, he is 6'5), and people totally laugh when they see them together (especially since she is quite dark and he is very blond), but they have been married for about 20 years!

 

If you don't find him attractive, then you probably shouldn't date him. Finding your mate attractive is a key component to any relationship.

[isisastaria]

I think it's fine. Who cares what they think? Really!!! I bet he adores you and thinks you're beautiful! Do you really want to look back and say, "Well, I could have been really happy, but he was too much bigger than me and what would everyone have thought???" Don't think so. And if so, should you be in a relationship at all right now? Sometimes when you wonder about those sorts of things you just need to take a break so things don't feel so akward for you. I hope that made enough sense and was helpful and not insulting at all! Really...!

[sasky101]

Hey,

I am 5'6 and weigh 110 pounds while my boyfriend is 6'8 and weighs 210...trust me it's fine!! Who cares what people think anyway?

[BeStrongBeHappy]

are you worried about the difference in height, or are you saying you think he is too fat for you? if you are attracted to him on more than a superficial level, then neither should matter...

 

but if you are more worried about what other people think about him a bit overweight (and not really that much), then do him a favor and don't go out with him again... he doesn't need to be with someone who is ashamed of him or embarrassed to be seen with him because he is not whippet thin. he needs to be with someone who thinks he's great as he is and is interested in more than just his looks...

 

when you really care about someone, you have the opposite reaction of the one you are having now, i.e., you would get angry that anyone else would criticize someone you care about, and you don't spend time worrying about your looks together, or what other people think.

[Night Pumpkin]

What matters is how big his heart his, not how big his waist is....

 

Helllo all,

 

I started to date a guy. We went out for 2 times. He seems a good guy but he is twice my weight. I'm just 5ft 3 in/95lb and he is 6ft 1 in/212lb. I feel somehow uncomfortable to walk on the street with him. Does weight matter in a relation? I need your opinion on this matter.

Thanks,

PLC

[Altruist]

To me weight doesn't matter at all. If she's healthy and takes good care of herself, its OK. I draw the line at obesity though.

[applepie]

My mom is 5'3" and about 130lbs, and my dad is 6'8" and 280lbs. They've been married for 36 years and are still happy. I don't think that height and weight matters, at least not for them.

 

How important is it to you what other people that don't know you think about your differences?

 

How tall did you come out!?

[Leonhart]

As long as attraction is there, then no, weight does not matter.

[omayra]

I would say that if you are really in love with him then dont care for what others have to say but if ur just with himm just because then dont go out wit him dump him. i know yall just stared going out but i think u should just give it a tri and really c if it is real love u never know

[TheFoglifter]

Depends on what the weight means.

 

I have known many overweight girls who carried themselves differently. Some accept themselves for who they are, and understand that they are choosing not to lose that weight. They maintain a happy outlook on life and are fun to be with, and are probably great in bed.

 

Others sulk and beat themselves up silently -- hating their appearance, but not making an effort to fix it. Those are the ones that project their issues onto others, making others pay for their mistakes as such. Those are the ones that don't want to have sex, and if they ever do, it must be in absolute pitch black.

 

My gf started out as the first type, and is now the second type. Its kind of sad really because falling in love with her because she was such a wonderful person taught me that its whats on the inside that counts. Now I have the worst of both worlds, as such. If I had known that it would end up this way, I wonder if I'd have told myself NOT to get involved because no matter how good things seemed, they would degenerate.

[ghost69]

if you sleep with him and you wake up missing an arm or something and there is a tub of barbeque sauce next to the bed and he has it on his lips. get out.

[Aurian]

212 is overweight for 6'1"???

[therealshrek]

212 is overweight for 6'1"???

 

i was asking the same thing. man if people think thats bad, i wonder what they think of me!?!? I'm 5'11" and 250 pnds

[Aurian]

Depends on your build I guess... but still, I hope the OP was referring to height, not weight!

[Night Pumpkin]

Have you ever slept with a man and woke up with a missing arm and a tub of barbeque sauce next to your bed ?? Just wondering where a comment like that originated from...

 

if you sleep with him and you wake up missing an arm or something and there is a tub of barbeque sauce next to the bed and he has it on his lips. get out.

[ghost69]

it was a joke pumpkin. i've never slept with a man and never will.

 

i'm 6'3 and 215 and in great shape. 212 isn't overweight. depends if they are in shape though.

 

anyways, my ex was 5'0 95 lbs. we got along great. i was much bigger than her, but it was all good.

[Night Pumpkin]

I am pretty sure that over 190 pounds is over weight for someone of your height, but only slightly.

[willow2900]

I am pretty sure that over 190 pounds is over weight for someone of your height, but only slightly.

 

WHAT?? I hope that's a joke?!

My ex was 6'1" and 245, and NOT fat at all! Solid muscle.

 

Muscle weighs more than fat!

 

BMI index is a GUIDELINE not a hard fast rule. There are so many variables to weight that they are too numerous to list.

[ghost69]

BMI is almost never right for fitness people. BMI is based on averages.