Is it stange that I enjoyed this?

[Starlight925]

21 minutes ago, midnightdeirdre said:

And I can't help but wonder if that's a bad thing/strange thing. 😏

Yes, both bad and strange.

Are you under a therapist's care?

[MissCanuck]

24 minutes ago, midnightdeirdre said:

lol guys obviously THE WHOLE WORLD was tuned in to that when it happened.

Well, yes, that's the point I am trying to get across to you. 

It's frankly quite strange that it makes you feel important when you are but one of a whole world of people who were around when it happened. 

[midnightdeirdre]

7 minutes ago, Starlight925 said:

Yes, both bad and strange.

Are you under a therapist's care?

Why is such a terrible thing that I like the feeling of "belonging" to an event that went down in history?

I have seen over a dozen therapists since I was 16. Only a select few have genuinely helped. I do take medication to help with my depression, OCD, and anxiety. I'm also autistic.

[itsallgrand]

Do you have people and places where you feel a sense of belonging these days? I mean honestly, I don't think a lot of people will feel warm and fuzzy hearing you feel excited to share witnessing horrible things and many may feel uncomfortable about it. It comes across as lacking empathy for those impacted by tragedy and making it about you.

 

[Wiseman2]

49 minutes ago, midnightdeirdre said:

. I can't help but enjoy the fact that I'm able to say that I am one of those hundreds of millions who can say they remember such a life-changing event clearly.

It seems like you want to belong and be recognized. However watching something on TV doesn't make anyone important.  Please rethink your wording about it. It's unclear if you're doing it for attention, but telling people you "enjoyed" a tragedy does the opposite of what you're hoping which is to belong or be recognized.  

[Capricorn3]

2 hours ago, itsallgrand said:

Do you have people and places where you feel a sense of belonging these days? I mean honestly, I don't think a lot of people will feel warm and fuzzy hearing you feel excited to share witnessing horrible things and many may feel uncomfortable about it. It comes across as lacking empathy for those impacted by tragedy and making it about you.

 

Agreed.  It's also rather disturbing that many of your (OP) posts in this thread have "lol" and smileys, as if the whole thing is so funny and hilarious and remembering it all makes you super happy. 100% of people will not find this amusing at all.  I do hope your therapists can get through to you to help you understand.

[midnightdeirdre]

4 minutes ago, Capricorn3 said:

It's also rather disturbing that many of your (OP) posts in this thread have "lol" and smileys, as if the whole thing is so funny and hilarious and remembering it all makes you super happy. 

The comments where I put "lol" and smileys have nothing to do with the 9/11 tragedy.

[Jaunty]

Most of us on this thread can remember what we were doing when the Twin Towers bombing was happening.   Those of us who were alive, and especially in America, can remember when JFK was shot.   I was a very little child and can recall.

I don't think that any of us feel "important" because of it except for you, @midnightdeirdre

There is some kind of positive feeling involved when people are sharing about what we were doing at those exact moments.  It can bring a sense of solidarity and also helps us see each other as fully human instead of just typed words on an Internet forum, or maybe loose acquaintances at work.   A common thread that binds us together.  I understand why that can be experienced in a positive way.  

I think it's very unusual though to feel important or to "enjoy" having seen it on TV, much less to have it as a centerpiece of the "happiest summer of your life."  

There's something anti-social about viewing this in a way that makes it mainly reflect back upon yourself.   

 

[Seraphim]

1 minute ago, Jaunty said:

Most of us on this thread can remember what we were doing when the Twin Towers bombing was happening.   Those of us who were alive, and especially in America, can remember when JFK was shot.   I was a very little child and can recall.

I don't think that any of us feel "important" because of us except for you, @midnightdeirdre

There is some kind of positive feeling involved when people are sharing about what we were doing at those exact moments.  It can bring a sense of solidarity and also helps us see each other as fully human instead of just typed words on an Internet forum, or maybe loose acquaintances at work.   A common thread that binds us together.  I understand why that can be experienced in a positive way.  

I think it's very unusual though to feel important or to "enjoy" having seen it on TV, much less to have it as a centerpiece of the "happiest summer of your life."  

There's something anti-social about viewing this in a way that makes it mainly reflect back upon yourself.   

 

I think that is the crux of it , none of us find our own importance in these events. We don’t anchor who we are on tragic events. 
 

OP, you need to find value within yourself .  

[midnightdeirdre]

2 minutes ago, Jaunty said:

There's something anti-social about viewing this in a way that makes it mainly reflect back upon yourself.  

I know I keep saying it, but it's because I'm autistic. (The A in Autism should stand for Anti-social, lol.)

[Seraphim]

Just now, midnightdeirdre said:

I know I keep saying it, but it's because I'm autistic. (The A in Autism should stand for Anti-social, lol.)

It maybe how your Autistic experience is expressed but definitely not all Autistic experience. 

[Starlight925]

I know many Autistic people.  I’m having dinner tonight with a friend who has Asperger’s.  
 I’ve never seen such a lack of empathy or compassion from any of them. 
You get an actual thrill out of this, and it’s highly disturbing. 

[Jaunty]

OP:  At times it seems like you really do enjoy making posts that are likely to get a rise out of people.   Am I right about this?

[midnightdeirdre]

7 minutes ago, Starlight925 said:

I know many Autistic people.  I’m having dinner tonight with a friend who has Asperger’s.  
 I’ve never seen such a lack of empathy or compassion from any of them. 
You get an actual thrill out of this, and it’s highly disturbing. 

There's a saying that goes, "If you've met one person with autism, you've met one person with autism."

In other words, no 2 autistic people are alike and it is a W-I-D-E spectrum. (To put it mildly.)

[midnightdeirdre]

9 minutes ago, Starlight925 said:

I know many Autistic people.  I’m having dinner tonight with a friend who has Asperger’s. 

Ironically, I would think you of all people would understand that it is a wide spectrum. 🤨

[midnightdeirdre]

4 minutes ago, Jaunty said:

OP:  At times it seems like you really do enjoy making posts that are likely to get a rise out of people.   Am I right about this?

lol no, that is not my intent. I'm trying to understand if my reaction to the 9/11 tragedy was normal on some level. Everyone either seems to think it was highly odd OR they understand that it gave me a sense of importance and belonging. 

[Wiseman2]

24 minutes ago, midnightdeirdre said:

I know I keep saying it, but it's because I'm autistic.

That's ok. However you are fully aware that enjoying tragedy is "weird". In fact it's your thread title. Please understand there are better ways to get attention and recognition than trying to create controversy. 

[midnightdeirdre]

Just now, Wiseman2 said:

However you are fully aware that enjoying tragedy is "weird".

Rather it wasn't the tragedy itself that I enjoyed...it was the fact that I knew such a monumental event comes once in a lifetime, and that it was something that was going down in history----and I was going to be able to say "I was there." (You know what I mean.)

[Seraphim]

14 minutes ago, midnightdeirdre said:

Rather it wasn't the tragedy itself that I enjoyed...it was the fact that I knew such a monumental event comes once in a lifetime, and that it was something that was going down in history----and I was going to be able to say "I was there." (You know what I mean.)

Don’t hinge your importance on those events. You don’t become important because you have an event to talk about . 

[midnightdeirdre]

2 minutes ago, Seraphim said:

Don’t hinge your importance on those events. You don’t become important because you have an event to talk about . 

This actually made me feel better....but why is that?

[Wiseman2]

On 12/16/2023 at 1:30 PM, midnightdeirdre said:

 Naturally I took a photo of the TV set that day.

Watching TV doesn't make anyone interesting or important.  

[Seraphim]

9 minutes ago, midnightdeirdre said:

This actually made me feel better....but why is that?

Because people are important due to the fact they are unique. There is only one of you in the world. How are you important if 50 million people talk about the same event ? 

[midnightdeirdre]

13 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said:

Watching TV doesn't make anyone interesting or important.  

I repeat: it was the circumstances that day that made me take a photo of the TV. (The photo was obviously to look back on and see how much our house has changed since that infamous day that changed the world. I knew nothing was going to be the same again, and I wanted to soak in the fact that I was around for it all.)

[midnightdeirdre]

7 minutes ago, Seraphim said:

Because people are important due to the fact they are unique. There is only one of you in the world. How are you important if 50 million people talk about the same event ? 

Well, being unique isn't always viewed/experienced as a positive thing, sadly. My entire life I felt I never fit in. (And for the obvious reason. 🧩)

[Seraphim]

Well, every human in the entire world that exists , that has ever existed and will exist are unique. We all experience life and events in our own specific way, never the same as another human. 
 

My son solves the “ not fitting in” by only relating to friends that are Autistic. Family he can’t choose, however he does have other neurodivergent family members. His dad, me, his cousin, one of his grandfathers was. He chooses to relate to other neurodivergent people and not pigeonhole himself to “ fit in”.