Found out he cheated a while ago…

[adviceseekingtina]

I’ve been dating this guy for close to 3 years now, and we’ve had our ups and downs but it’s overall been a fruitful relationship. I don’t know what was in me to check his email account, but he has two so I scrolled through the second account on his phone and found that he had commented on a girls craigslist post, asked for an exchange and received a photo. There was another post in which he asked to meet up, but there were no other follow ups… I don’t know how to bring this up because it happened 2 years ago and he’s been faithful since, but I can’t stop thinking about it. I need direction 

[Rose Mosse]

I’d be concerned that I felt the need to look through his emails. It suggests things have gotten that bad between the two of you. That’s an indicator to me I no longer feel comfortable in a relationship and uneasy enough possibly think of ending it permanently. My peace of mind is paramount and hold that as more valuable than anything else a person can offer.

You may never know the truth of what happened two years ago even if you confront him. And he may have started using another email address or just found other women to meet up with (not through places like Craigslist).

Do you have children and/or do you live together? 

 

[MissCanuck]

38 minutes ago, adviceseekingtina said:

I don’t know how to bring this up because it happened 2 years ago and he’s been faithful since

Well, he hasn't been trolling Craigslist. But that doesn't mean he's been faithful. 

Something must have been bothering you to lead you to check his emails. What's been happening in the relationship that brought you to that point?

 

[Wiseman2]

4 hours ago, adviceseekingtina said:

I’ve been dating this guy for close to 3 years now.

Sorry this is happening.  Do you live together? How long? How old is he?

What inspired you to scroll through his messages? It seems like you are uneasy about things.

What do you mean by ups and downs? Do you have similar goals? Marriage, family, etc.?

How do you know he's been faithful since? Does he frequent escorts? 

Once scrolling through phones happens, something is wrong. You're in a tough place because you don't want to admit you've been rifling through his phone, yet you were looking for something and you know why .

 

[smackie9]

During those "down" times he was probably hitting girls up. 

[reinventmyself]

This is a character issue.  It is in his character to solicit women on craigslist. 

Are you ok with that and are you going to be able to compartmentalize this and move forward?