Wiseman2 Posted January 4, 2020 Share Posted January 4, 2020 Take her advice and find love and be happy. Delete and block her so you can peacefully move forward.Happy new year, hope you find love, be happy etc. Link to comment
Dmk1986e Posted January 10, 2020 Author Share Posted January 10, 2020 I replied to her email. I just kept it short and told her I am doing fine, just got a new apartment (the house we planned for 3 years to share together) I wish her well... etc..I basically relieved her guilt. Even though doing this hurts me more, and makes her feel better. Got a email back within minutes.. she said she is in pain, and she is very sorry how she ended it. That she misses me, and wishes she did love me. She ended it saying she is very happy with what I said, that we can always be great "friends", and to tell her as soon as I find a new girlfriend. I replied again and said I am focusing on my life, and not trying to date so soon after being engaged. Then I said I wish the best for you and your boyfriend. She has not responded. Am I reaching indifference? Some days. For a few moments I see the light at the end of the tunnel. This is the biggest challenge of my life as of yet, but I can see the only way to be free of the pain is to accept this Link to comment
RayRay63 Posted January 10, 2020 Share Posted January 10, 2020 Anyway, Ignoring her email and not replying felt good. I replied to her email. .... Even though doing this hurts me more Has she asked for any money yet? Link to comment
boltnrun Posted January 10, 2020 Share Posted January 10, 2020 Ok, the boyfriend comment was passive aggressive. You were hoping she'd come back with "what boyfriend???" So now can you block her and move on with your life? Link to comment
ninjabib Posted January 10, 2020 Share Posted January 10, 2020 She still isn't blocked? Good lord. Link to comment
RayRay63 Posted January 10, 2020 Share Posted January 10, 2020 She still isn't blocked? Good lord. The OP has deluded himself into thinking this is "indifference". Some days, anyway. Link to comment
Dmk1986e Posted January 12, 2020 Author Share Posted January 12, 2020 The OP has deluded himself into thinking this is "indifference". Some days, anyway. Come on mate, Im not doing that bad lol. Bordering acceptance, and maybe indifference. 2 months no contact, and I replied to her 2 christmas and new year emails and simply wished her well. She said she is finally studying to become a vet ( I had already saved money for her to study this in US) I wanted to say to her, you will be a great vet, just please treat animals with more humanity and compassion than you treat your relationships😂 Moving forwards to better things.. Link to comment
boltnrun Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 Come on mate, Im not doing that bad lol. Bordering acceptance, and maybe indifference. 2 months no contact, and I replied to her 2 christmas and new year emails and simply wished her well. She said she is finally studying to become a vet ( I had already saved money for her to study this in US) I wanted to say to her, you will be a great vet, just please treat animals with more humanity and compassion than you treat your relationships😂 Moving forwards to better things.. I hope she didn't ask for any of that money. And if she did have the nerve to ask, I hope you didn't send any. Spend that money on something fun with your child, is my recommendation. Link to comment
Dmk1986e Posted January 12, 2020 Author Share Posted January 12, 2020 Ok, the boyfriend comment was passive aggressive. You were hoping she'd come back with "what boyfriend???" So now can you block her and move on with your life? It was, you are right. I figured since she said she hopes I find someone that makes me happy, I would wish her and her new love the best. Lets just remember when she broke upshe told me she met someone ( 2 weeks after I payed for her to fly to Rio for a us visa interview) None of this matters anyway, still its nice to express it, in some shape or form. How can I private message on this site? I need more posts? Link to comment
Dmk1986e Posted January 12, 2020 Author Share Posted January 12, 2020 I hope she didn't ask for any of that money. And if she did have the nerve to ask, I hope you didn't send any. Spend that money on something fun with your child, is my recommendation. no, but she did say in her second email when I am dating, to not give any woman money, because we feel "bought". I replied that I never intended to buy anyone, but I have no problem helping someone I care about. True enough. Thank you. I am planning a vacation with my daughter soon, I think traveling again will help change my perspective of all this. I just need to snap out of it and see life for what it is. Link to comment
RayRay63 Posted January 13, 2020 Share Posted January 13, 2020 Come on mate, Im not doing that bad lol. Bordering acceptance, and maybe indifference. 2 months no contact, and I replied to her 2 christmas and new year emails and simply wished her well. She said she is finally studying to become a vet ( I had already saved money for her to study this in US) I wanted to say to her, you will be a great vet, just please treat animals with more humanity and compassion than you treat your relationships😂 Moving forwards to better things.. You just undid a lot of that two months' good work. You broke no contact, and replied to bread crumbs, even though you already said it felt good to not reply to the Xmas one. Even then, instead of politely saying thanks, and leaving it there, you gave her some information about you, and extended the exchange. Then you posted the detail of it here for comment/discussion. Are you reading and re-reading the emails, trying to analyze every word? It's OK to admit you were still holding some hope that she busted up with the new boyfriend and wanted to get back with you, and come and live in that apartment you told her about in the email. While you continue to communicate, and hold that hope tightly, you have not reached acceptance, let alone indifference. Be brutally honest with yourself - if you are thinking 'this is just sort of period of confusion on her part, it won't work, she loves me and she'll be back' - then you are still in denial, some days. The grief process is not linear, you can swing back and forth through the phases, but when you reach the final detachment point, and truly become indifferent, you'll know it. Link to comment
ninjabib Posted January 13, 2020 Share Posted January 13, 2020 You are still stuck OP. I see no progression Link to comment
boltnrun Posted January 13, 2020 Share Posted January 13, 2020 You blocked her, correct? If not, why not? Link to comment
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