boltnrun Posted April 24, 2018 Share Posted April 24, 2018 Good for you. You can do much, much better. Stay strong, though...he WILL contact you acting like nothing happened. After all, he'd be hard pressed to find another attractive woman willing to put up with his BS. Link to comment
mandeelove Posted April 24, 2018 Author Share Posted April 24, 2018 Good for you. You can do much, much better. Stay strong, though...he WILL contact you acting like nothing happened. After all, he'd be hard pressed to find another attractive woman willing to put up with his BS.You are right . And if he did call again I have to remind myself its not that he has real love for me, he most likely needs someone to abuse and take his bs. The only way to show love is to change his bad behaviors and make it stay that way.. But he never did longer than a few days. Link to comment
ThatwasThen Posted April 24, 2018 Share Posted April 24, 2018 No I see more bad than good in this relationship and long term it could never work for me. Theres too many issues but lack of respect is the theme overall from his end.Did you break up with him then? Link to comment
figureitout23 Posted April 24, 2018 Share Posted April 24, 2018 Good for you Mandee! You can do it. Link to comment
mandeelove Posted April 25, 2018 Author Share Posted April 25, 2018 Did you break up with him then?I broke up with him after that incident yes Link to comment
lostandhurt Posted April 25, 2018 Share Posted April 25, 2018 Reading through all the replies it looks like you have an unanimous agreement that he has been wrong to treat you the way he has and did that evening. You were right to dump him, are you committed to staying true to what you knew all along? For some reason you chose to tolerate this D-bag all this time even though you knew he could care less about your feelings, your time and your love. Stop making excuses for anyone that treats you badly. Knowing your value is the key to your future... Lost Link to comment
annie24 Posted April 25, 2018 Share Posted April 25, 2018 I don't know if it was already mentioned, but if you know he will be 30 minutes late, then tell him to meet you at 5:30 but don't show up until 6. If everything is otherwise good, and it sounds like it wasn't. :o Link to comment
mandeelove Posted April 25, 2018 Author Share Posted April 25, 2018 I don't know if it was already mentioned, but if you know he will be 30 minutes late, then tell him to meet you at 5:30 but don't show up until 6. If everything is otherwise good, and it sounds like it wasn't. :oLol Thanks .!! But yes I wish it was only about time. It's more about lack of respect overall and not putting effort. Putting more effort for everyone except me. The same things he disrespects me on, he would never disrespect others on. Link to comment
Batya33 Posted April 25, 2018 Share Posted April 25, 2018 Lol Thanks .!! But yes I wish it was only about time. It's more about lack of respect overall and not putting effort. Putting more effort for everyone except me. The same things he disrespects me on, he would never disrespect others on. But the comparison isn't as relevant as you think it is. It's whether he treats you with respect according to your own standards and values. Link to comment
mandeelove Posted April 25, 2018 Author Share Posted April 25, 2018 But the comparison isn't as relevant as you think it is. It's whether he treats you with respect according to your own standards and values.Yes I know. He doesn't at all Link to comment
Batya33 Posted April 26, 2018 Share Posted April 26, 2018 Yes I know. He doesn't at all Right and that's all that matters. Obviously it's irritating to see his ability to treat others but here's the truth -unless a person has a serious mental disorder or has dementia he or she is able to treat others with respect and thoughtfulness and compassion so no need to go there with "well maybe he "can't". Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted April 26, 2018 Share Posted April 26, 2018 Unfortunately, you can blame him, but your propensity to keep running to him is the part that needs the most reflection and introspection. Otherwise this will be like bad reruns just with one guy like this after the next. You are waiting for him to change and blaming him but that's easier than being honest with yourself about why you do this.he most likely needs someone to abuse and take his bs. The only way to show love is to change his bad behaviors and make it stay that way.. But he never did longer than a few days. Link to comment
mandeelove Posted April 26, 2018 Author Share Posted April 26, 2018 Right and that's all that matters. Obviously it's irritating to see his ability to treat others but here's the truth -unless a person has a serious mental disorder or has dementia he or she is able to treat others with respect and thoughtfulness and compassion so no need to go there with "well maybe he "can't".Exactly I agree with you 100 percent. And when I asked him this a while back he basically said those people are all " business related " so he has to kiss their butts. Which irritated me even more. Link to comment
boltnrun Posted April 26, 2018 Share Posted April 26, 2018 Exactly I agree with you 100 percent. And when I asked him this a while back he basically said those people are all " business related " so he has to kiss their butts. Which irritated me even more. Did you stay with him after that conversation? One thing one of my exes pointed out to me has stayed in my mind...when I protested yet again about how he was treating me, he said "well, you keep coming back so I figure you must like the way I treat you." Something to think about. Link to comment
mandeelove Posted April 26, 2018 Author Share Posted April 26, 2018 Did you stay with him after that conversation? One thing one of my exes pointed out to me has stayed in my mind...when I protested yet again about how he was treating me, he said "well, you keep coming back so I figure you must like the way I treat you." Something to think about.Yes I stayed. That convo was early on in the relationship so that set the tone and I should of listened to it right away. All I can say is that it got worse in regards to lack of respect and effort. It was always the same story and I do think by me staying he saw me as a pushover. It's interesting what your ex said . I believe this guy would tell me the same thing if I asked. Link to comment
boltnrun Posted April 26, 2018 Share Posted April 26, 2018 Yes I stayed. That convo was early on in the relationship so that set the tone and I should of listened to it right away. All I can say is that it got worse in regards to lack of respect and effort. It was always the same story and I do think by me staying he saw me as a pushover. It's interesting what your ex said . I believe this guy would tell me the same thing if I asked. So just remind yourself of that when he comes creeping back. If a man treats us poorly and we not only stay but tell them we love them...it becomes our responsibility, not theirs. Link to comment
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