Piaresssss Posted January 12, 2018 Author Share Posted January 12, 2018 Im gonna try. Im really confused at the moment. Just bouncing around different feelings. Sad to angry to just lost. I have not been doing any of the stuff to make myself better lately. Have not been gym in about two weeks. Just work then home. Work then home. Need to make plans with my friends more than i do. At least once a week would be good. Link to comment
Carus Posted January 12, 2018 Share Posted January 12, 2018 It ain't called the Emotional Rollercoaster for nuthin'..! I sense your impatience and I am suffering frustration myself...you know, the old 'I should be over it by now'.... But unfortunately it will take as long as it takes and you need to accept the feelings when they come so your mind and body can process them properly for the long term. My apartment has a bath so you won't miss out there lol Might have to start doing that myself! Carus* Link to comment
Piaresssss Posted January 12, 2018 Author Share Posted January 12, 2018 You summed me up to a tee. Im very impatient. It really is something i need to work on. I hate having to wait for something. I am very much part of the instant gratification culture. Im coming to terms with the breakup now. I have accepted we are not together which i am thankful for. Still have a long way to go. Thanks for all the support Link to comment
sputnik123 Posted January 12, 2018 Share Posted January 12, 2018 Well done buddy. Proud of you on the acceptance. It's a difficult hurdle. Have a great weekend x Link to comment
Piaresssss Posted January 12, 2018 Author Share Posted January 12, 2018 Thanks Sputnik its a big thing for me. Cannot really sleep. Im gonna go to the gym tomorrow and try and go see some friends. If they are available. Been thinking about everyones what seems universal idea of block and move on. I thought that was not for me because I did not hate my ex, she was not a bad person and honestly still is not. I understand if the break is bad do it but i could not wrap my head around it if you still cared. Now I get it. It is because you still care that you have to do it. It is not a reflection of you or the ex. Not a reflextion of bitterness but a necessity. I read stories on here of people still hung up on an ex from years ago and find myself thinking i hope i dont become like that. Gonna try and get some good sleep in, maybe even some cheeky cardio tomorrow at the gym. I normally just lift weights. Starting a new diet on monday. I have not eaten properly in about 4 months so hope this lifts my mood in general. Link to comment
Piaresssss Posted January 13, 2018 Author Share Posted January 13, 2018 Was feeling down so i took a walk with my mum and nephew and the dog. Had a nice chat with my mum made me feel a bit better. Dont really know what else to do today. Friends are busy. I feel like im wastinf the day. Maybe I should look for more jobs. Link to comment
Piaresssss Posted January 13, 2018 Author Share Posted January 13, 2018 I just read a saying that has made me feel better. Why should i be sad I lost someone who did not love me. My ex lost someone who loved her and that is alot worse. Link to comment
Carus Posted January 13, 2018 Share Posted January 13, 2018 Why should i be sad I lost someone who did not love me. My ex lost someone who loved her and that is alot worse. Ooh! I love it...! It sounds the same for you but my ex did love me...just not enough, and neither of us had the skills to right the sinking ship. If you have the strength to not go looking at her social media I wouldn't block her. I never blocked my ex but I did Unfollow her... Also, we don't have to fill every single day to the brim.... That is just a coping strategy and is ok...in the short term* C* Link to comment
Piaresssss Posted January 13, 2018 Author Share Posted January 13, 2018 Thanks for that Carus. All the moving on literature I have read talks about getting out all the time and when im not i feel like im failing somehow. Its nice to know that I'm not Link to comment
Carus Posted January 13, 2018 Share Posted January 13, 2018 Not at all buddy, and don't forget: If I was this in love with the wrong person, imagine how great it will be when it's with the right one* :) Link to comment
Piaresssss Posted January 13, 2018 Author Share Posted January 13, 2018 Was feeling lonely so went and had a chat with my stepdad. Its crazy hiw different him and my mum are. She is the soft caring type amd he is the though love tell it how it is type. I was telling him im lonely and we talked about why that is. How I havent been to the gym and am letting things in my life slide. He is right. I need to stop feeling sorry for myself and get my life back in order. My list from the other day is achievable and setting my sights on my first goal. The new job. Gonna try and line up so more interviews. Got training with my coach twice this week so that will make me feel better. Gonna stay at my bros tonight and cuddle his dog. That will make me feel better. Link to comment
boltnrun Posted January 13, 2018 Share Posted January 13, 2018 Do you see a direct correlation between not going to the gym and eating poorly and feeling down? Link to comment
Morello Posted January 14, 2018 Share Posted January 14, 2018 That's a very good point by boltrun. Going to the gym 5 times a week was definitely the biggest part in my recovery. That leads to you being more conscious about eating. This will lead you to lose weight, get fit and more confident. By doing that, you'll not only feel better physically but also mentally. I find that when you're lacking a bit of motivation to exercise, it's better to think about being consistent. I try to get myself to go to the gym or for a run or cycle on most days, regardless of how I'm feeling. Some days I'll be tired and will do a lazy workout routine. Sometimes just go for a one hour lazy walk. Some days I'll be feeling great and try to compensate and go a bit hardcore. But the consistency is what helps me get motivated to show up the next day at the gym. It's like "I'm keeping up, so I shouldn't stop now". That compared to going just 2 or 3 days a week, when I'd feel something like "I wont' really matter if I skip today because I can do it tomorrow". Link to comment
Piaresssss Posted January 14, 2018 Author Share Posted January 14, 2018 Yh you both make good points. Im going to the gym after work. Got all my stuff with me. Hoping it makes me feel better. Link to comment
sputnik123 Posted January 14, 2018 Share Posted January 14, 2018 Hey Piaresssss, Hope you are O.K "He is right. I need to stop feeling sorry for myself and get my life back in order. My list from the other day is achievable and setting my sights on my first goal. The new job. Gonna try and line up so more interviews." Yes, stick to that list my friend. It was a grand and achievable list The gym, or any decent physical exercise definitely helps in the short-tem. Not sure why, but it does! Keep spending time with the people who have your back and channelling all your thoughts on here too. Please keep remembering that you are so young and you have everything ahead of you, also being a great guy helps! Link to comment
Piaresssss Posted January 14, 2018 Author Share Posted January 14, 2018 Thanks Sputnik. Maybe its because im such an old soul i forget im young. To my journal Just finsihed reading Sputnik's and Carus' updates. Makes me feel alot better that they are both getting better. That also shows my growth. Im alot more compasionate that i was. Which is a very good thing. I had an okay day in the end. Applying for more jobs. They have cut hours at work but then hired 2 new people which doesnt make sense to me but im not in charge. Had a really nice chat with my brother yesterday night. Just made me happier talking to him. Talked about gym and stuff going on in his life. Anyway gonna have a bubble bath and then hit the hay. I planned on playing rainbow six siege but i have a five hour update which puts a spanner in those plans. Link to comment
sputnik123 Posted January 14, 2018 Share Posted January 14, 2018 You are very welcome buddy! "Im alot more compasionate that i was. Which is a very good thing". Right with you here.. it's strange how things work.. "They have cut hours at work but then hired 2 new people which doesnt make sense to me but im not in charge". - Sounds strange, but some places have a minimum headcount requirement, regardless of hours I think.. I wish you all the best with the job hunt.. it's dog eat dog out there, but I have faith in you! Hope you have a restful sleep. S x Link to comment
Piaresssss Posted January 15, 2018 Author Share Posted January 15, 2018 Got another interview lined up. Think this is the one that i really want. Thats what I have set my sights on. My current job makes me feel so bad about myself and I just dont enjoy it. Anyway. I had an okay day. Am at home and about to have yet another bubble bath. Im not sure I am missing my ex anymore but am more lonely than anything. Gonna soak in some bubbles then hit the hay. Got personal training at 10 tomorrow so gonna enjoy that Link to comment
sputnik123 Posted January 15, 2018 Share Posted January 15, 2018 That's great news buddy. When is it? The loneliness won't last long, I have no doubt. Very good news on the PT tomorrow! Link to comment
Piaresssss Posted January 15, 2018 Author Share Posted January 15, 2018 Its a phone interview with a man in texas at the end of the week. Quite exciting. Link to comment
sputnik123 Posted January 15, 2018 Share Posted January 15, 2018 Ah cool.. I hope they are picking up the charges! lol Link to comment
Piaresssss Posted January 16, 2018 Author Share Posted January 16, 2018 Me too Sputnik but if i get it its like quadruple what I earn at the moment. Just got back from the gym. First seesion in what seems like forever. Really enjoyed it. It makes me feel so much better. Gotta keep it up. Gonna go again thursday. Now im gonna chill out then go to my staff meeting. Might even have a nap. Link to comment
sputnik123 Posted January 16, 2018 Share Posted January 16, 2018 4 times more? WOW! Drinks on you when you get this one Great that you enjoyed the gym.. keep it up! Link to comment
Carus Posted January 16, 2018 Share Posted January 16, 2018 Sputnik beat me to it but yeh wow! Quadruple. That's quite an increase! That will certainly make you feel better. I'm actually lamenting taking that apartment a little coz I could actually be in a much better situation financially, but it is a beautiful spot and good for my healing. See what happens at the end of the year. Gym and bubble baths. You're doin' the right things brother :) Keep up the good work Carus* Link to comment
Piaresssss Posted January 17, 2018 Author Share Posted January 17, 2018 Thanks guys. I got the phone interview scheduled today for Friday at 8.30pm. Quite late I know but he is based in Texas. If you had said to me 4 months ago i would be having an interview with someone in texas i would of laughed at the very idea. Just shows how much has changed. I had an interview today but didnt get it. Not to worry though, each no is a chance to learn. Got some good feed back on my interview style. I just have to give more detailed answers. Anyway, how am i feeling today. Im okay. Been thinking of the ex but am going through phases of not thinking of her then realising that im not and it makes me feel good. If that makes any sense. Im getting better each day. Got gym tomorrow and that is gonna make me feel good. I need to get out and see some of my friends on saturday. Hopefully they are not busy. If i can get the new job that will knock one off my list and its not even the end of january. Hope everyones day is great and keep the healing up x 😋 Link to comment
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