Unprotected sex with my BOYFRIEND of 7 years & getting an STD. Did he cheat?

[Annia]

Thank you so much i really need this type of advice!! with out the help of others i wouldn't know what to do ♥

 

Good luck, you're on the right path, you'll make it and will become stronger after the storm has passed.

[jujusamples]

Yes, he definitely cheated! I hope you take everyone's advice to value yourself and dump the creep. Also, I hope you take this as a lesson learnt in regards to, I love this guy, so therefore I'm going to have sex without condoms. He has cheated on you before, therefore, the chances of him doing it again, is pretty high. To be honest, I'm not sure why you have ask why he cheated, the answer is pretty obvious. It's also a red flag when you feel scared of the person you are in a relationship with.

[Kandy29]

when we would break up it would only be for like a day or 3. i used to be scared to be alone so i always took him back, and the last time i was away from him for long was because i went on vacation. it sucks to believe he cheated, but there's no way i gave myself an STD

[jujusamples]

when we would break up it would only be for like a day or 3. i used to be scared to be alone so i always took him back, and the last time i was away from him for long was because i went on vacation. it sucks to believe he cheated, but there's no way i gave myself an STD

 

You said he cheated on you before and that's why you broke up? You need to go full no contact, see a therapist and get hobby. Keep yourself busy with things you enjoy doing so you could stay away from him.

[Hollyj]

I don't get it either... he f***ed my head up. my first love, my first anything. this is why my head is f***ed up. i made a BAD decision by making him my everything.

These are not excuses. Please stop using them.

 

This guy cheated on you. he does to care about or respect you. You need to be done with this!

[Unreasonable]

He must have loved the person that gave him gonorrhea too, to not use condoms with her.

[yatsue]

when we would break up it would only be for like a day or 3. i used to be scared to be alone so i always took him back, and the last time i was away from him for long was because i went on vacation. it sucks to believe he cheated, but there's no way i gave myself an STD

 

No, he gave it to you for sure. You asked if he cheated while you two were together, which is a different question. So, you broke up for 3 days last time? What about the other parameters? I can't determine with accuracy if you don't know, but I'm sure he hasn't changed his cheating ways after getting back together so soon. I state that his recent cheating is not 100% known at the moment because I know public health & microbiology well, and cannot assure you anything without specific information (which I hope you can use to your advantage for your own good in leaving the D-bag).

[Kandy29]

I'm not using excuses... I'm only trying to learn. This is my first time being in love, sorry that i seem uneducated about this. It's new to me

[Wiseman2]

To be honest it doesn't matter when he contracted it. What matters is he's abusive and gave you an std. End it and get counselling from whatever clinic you just came from.

i used to be scared to be alone so i always took him back, and the last time i was away from him for long was because i went on vacation. it sucks to believe he cheated, but there's no way i gave myself an STD

[yatsue]

To be honest it doesn't matter when he contracted it. What matters is he's abusive and gave you an std. End it and get counselling from whatever clinic you just came from.

 

It may not matter for most people, but clearly it does to the OP. He has cheated before. She didn't leave. Then she contracted a disease from his shenanigans. People online telling her to leave isn't always enough. Perhaps knowing exactly how he still is a cheat and put her life in harm's way may be enough.

[Hollyj]

I'm not using excuses... I'm only trying to learn. This is my first time being in love, sorry that i seem uneducated about this. It's new to me

 

The point I am trying to make, is that you need to value yourself. By being with this creep, you are not.

 

You knew this was wrong when you posted this thread, You are a smart girl!

[ParisPaulette]

i made a BAD decision by making him my everything.

 

Here's the good news. You can unmake that bad decision by walking away, learning from the experience, focusing on your own life and happiness and doing things that make you believe you can do better.

 

My first real relationship was with an abusive drug dealer. I finally left after he hit me for the first time. I got over it, went on in life, got my act together and am now happily married to a truly great guy.

 

If I can do it, you can as well, but you need to believe you deserve better. And realize the temporary pain of a breakup far outweighs the lasting pain of someone who is drain on your self-esteem and respect. Love is supposed to make you stronger, better, happier. If it isn't then something is wrong and it's not the love for you.

 

Regardless of whether he got the STD while you both were together or not, the fact is it shows he is careless with life-threatening issues both for himself and for others as well. At the very least a responsible caring individual would have gone and gotten tested and made sure they were clean before coming back to you. He didn't do that and seriously someone who cares so little about anyone's safety, even their own, is just not the person you deserve to have in your life. Such people hurt or kill others even with their own carelessness, a harsh fact, but a true one.

 

This is your first love. It doesn't have to be your only one and messing your head about is only temporary. The faster you get him gone for good the faster you will recover and learn to do better. But this is also where I'm going to tell you that you need to focus on putting your own life together and having more in it than just a guy, because a relationship should only be one part of your life, not the whole and only thing in it or reason for existing.

 

If you're afraid to be alone this is where you take the time to confront that fear, to learn to be alone, and if need be talk it out with someone to find out why that fear is there. But my point is you need to live your life for you, to have your own accomplishments and adventures, and know who you are and what you want out of life. And no other person out there can give that to you and when you expect them to do so you leave yourself vulnerable to guys like this one.

 

I have been in your shoes. It will get better once you drop the dead weight out of your life. The pain of a breakup is temporary, but if you keep him around knowing he's causing you pain and messing with your head that damage takes more time to undo. But right now you're young, you can walk away and be fine and do better. I do think you can do this and maybe now is the time to just treat this as your wakeup call that this relationship isn't the right one for you.

[jujusamples]

I'm not using excuses... I'm only trying to learn. This is my first time being in love, sorry that i seem uneducated about this. It's new to me

 

Let me break it down to help you understand;

 

First thing first, you need to seek some counselling so you could work on why you are staying in this toxic abusive relationship.

 

He cheated on you before - red flag

 

He is manipulative - red flag

 

Cheated on you again and gave you and STD - red flag.

 

He doesn't care about your well being nor does he care to listen why you try to talk to him about anything. Instead he blames you - red flag

 

There is nothing about this man I could point out that he's a good person. Anyone whom tries to harm your health, is definitely NOT a good person. You need to now focus on working on your self esteem. Learn to love yourself before others could love you.

 

A good relationship requires, trust, honestly, communications and caring for the other person. It's not just about "I'm in love" with with him. He has to prove that he is "Love" worthy. Most important, he should care about your well being.

 

You boyfriend, does not demonstrate any of these good qualities which is what you need to look for in a mate. Of course, there are much more and there will be disagreements and so on, but you get the gist of it.

 

He treats you this way because you let him. Therefore, it's time to put a stop to it. Tell yourself, repeat it to yourself, "I will NEVER let this man in my life again" He does not deserve my love and dedication to him".

[Liraele]

 

Ditch this guy like a dirty sock .

 

I second this.

[Kandy29]

Thank you a lot! I will keep this screen-shot in my phone! I will take all of your advice and also everyone elses advice! This means a lot! ♥ i can do it!! And i will!!

[chitown9]

Thank you a lot! I will keep this screen-shot in my phone! I will take all of your advice and also everyone elses advice! This means a lot! ♥ i can do it!! And i will!!

 

Yes, that is a good idea.l You really must dump him because your very life depends on it. He just doesn't care about the consequences of his wreckless actions. chi

[jimthzz]

He's a waste of time at this point.

 

Recognize that your emotions are raw and you feel attached to him still. It is UNHEALTHY and LIFE RISKING for you to continue contact with him in any way at all.

 

Dump him, get treated for the STD and move on.