itsallgrand Posted July 26, 2015 Share Posted July 26, 2015 I think my reason for asking is that, as time goes by I more and more think that anything that I don't do that "everyone does" just makes me look even weirder. Why would you look weird? You seem like a cool person from your online posts anyways. Link to comment
TMifune Posted July 27, 2015 Author Share Posted July 27, 2015 Why would you look weird? You seem like a cool person from your online posts anyways. Don't know, but I do know that being kind, patient, intelligent, clever, "cool", "chill", loving, interesting, educated, funny, playful etc.....aren't generally enough to capture or maintain a woman's interest. It's almost funny that something as simple as social media seems like it's a bigger negative than even the combination of the above is a positive. Link to comment
Rosti87 Posted July 27, 2015 Share Posted July 27, 2015 Don't know, but I do know that being kind, patient, intelligent, clever, "cool", "chill", loving, interesting, educated, funny, playful etc.....aren't generally enough to capture or maintain a woman's interest. It's almost funny that something as simple as social media seems like it's a bigger negative than even the combination of the above is a positive. Well you had plenty of women here that did not care. If you view that in proportion to the population there are enough women out there that don't care if you conform. Link to comment
TMifune Posted July 27, 2015 Author Share Posted July 27, 2015 Well you had plenty of women here that did not care. If you view that in proportion to the population there are enough women out there that don't care if you conform. I hear ya. Sometimes it seems like dating is walking through a minefield. Everything's fine, but one single tiny misstep and BOOM. I'm just trying to figure out where the mines are, even though I know it can't really be done. Link to comment
notalady Posted July 27, 2015 Share Posted July 27, 2015 I hear ya. Sometimes it seems like dating is walking through a minefield. Everything's fine, but one single tiny misstep and BOOM. I'm just trying to figure out where the mines are, even though I know it can't really be done. All you can do is be who you are and do what you feel comfortable doing, live your life the way you want to, and the right person will fit right in. If there is something you consider not a big deal and someone does, then you're not compatible. Link to comment
Rosti87 Posted July 27, 2015 Share Posted July 27, 2015 I hear ya. Sometimes it seems like dating is walking through a minefield. Everything's fine, but one single tiny misstep and BOOM. I'm just trying to figure out where the mines are, even though I know it can't really be done. I'm with notalady. If you project yourself in a way that makes it plain where you stand then you will attract people of similar views and lifestyle. I'm an anomaly by American standards and I embrace it. Sometimes you are on the road alone, but most times there are others on that same road. It is truly a road less traveled but to me it is the most rewarding in the long term. Hang in there. Link to comment
Batya33 Posted July 27, 2015 Share Posted July 27, 2015 All you can do is be who you are and do what you feel comfortable doing, live your life the way you want to, and the right person will fit right in. If there is something you consider not a big deal and someone does, then you're not compatible. As one of my dear friends used to say- if you sneeze the wrong way while on a first date it's all over. It depends what is said "my mother did NOTHING" in response to "what did your mother do for a living" on a first date might not be the best thing to share or "my co-workers are all really dumb" or "I listen to an audiobook on how to find love during my commute every day". It's about being yourself and also making a good first impression -it's a balance. Link to comment
John John Posted July 27, 2015 Share Posted July 27, 2015 Ladies, Would you date a guy who didn't use Facebook at all? (Didn't read the whole thread) I don't use Facebook. I have a profile that I could re-activate, but have no desire to. Hilarious how this is even a question lol OP don't even worry about this, it's a non-issue! Link to comment
John John Posted July 27, 2015 Share Posted July 27, 2015 A number of women stopped communicating with me when they found out that I didn't have FB--I assume they thought I was married or shady or something. This doesn't surprise me at all. Someone once referred to me as weird for not having an active FB account. I just got so tired of it after a while and found it rather mundane and impersonal. And a waste of time. Link to comment
Sportster2005 Posted July 27, 2015 Share Posted July 27, 2015 Well you had plenty of women here that did not care. If you view that in proportion to the population there are enough women out there that don't care if you conform. I think it is an asset to not conform and march to the beat of your own drum. As long as you're not going out of your way not to conform. Which is just another way to conform, just more annoying. Think hipsters. Link to comment
Rosti87 Posted July 27, 2015 Share Posted July 27, 2015 I think it is an asset to not conform and march to the beat of your own drum. As long as you're not going out of your easy not to conform. Which is just another easy to conform, just more annoying. Think hipsters. Well to me hipsters are financially privileged kids and young adults who are bored with there mundane suburban lives. I don't know how they are in you neck of the woods but where I live they tend to be trust fund babies and privileged backgrounds and get off on being dingy, dirty and quirky. Of course, I'm speaking to people who evolved 'differently' from the mainstream either because of their childhood or their life adventures took them down a road less traveled. Link to comment
JustWishing Posted July 27, 2015 Share Posted July 27, 2015 I have a facebook account but I haven't so much as logged in in 5+ years. I still get notifications in my email sometimes, but they're mostly random status updates that facebook sends me in the hopes I'll log back in. I only keep it in case someone I might want to talk to from the past reaches out to me, but for the most part nobody uses it to try to get in touch with me, so it's basically just an old digital snapshot. Exact same thing here. Don't have Facebook, even though I meet the average age for having it. Also don't care if a guy has it or not. As a matter of fact, I prefer a guy not having it Link to comment
Patrick974 Posted July 27, 2015 Share Posted July 27, 2015 I assume some will prefer dating someone who doesnt own a FB account as to not be monitored. Ive seen so many empty account with barely a few pics and never a status update at all. Fake name and all. On the other hand more mundane people with thousand pics on vacation with glamour pics. That and the babies pics. God, Dunno if those kids later in life will appreciate their childhood pics registered in the Silicon Valley ad vitam. Yes, FB is before all an outlet and people do whatever with it. Depend how its used. Link to comment
Tanzi Posted July 27, 2015 Share Posted July 27, 2015 How very, very sad that a question like this even needs to be asked or made an issue of. And how very, very sad that to some there is no life outside of Facebook. I would actually find it quite attractive that someone doesn't feel the need to follow the heard. Link to comment
Sportster2005 Posted July 28, 2015 Share Posted July 28, 2015 I would actually find it quite attractive that someone doesn't feel the need to follow the heard(sic). Everyone follows a herd. Not having Facebook, is just the herd that doesn't use Facebook. Link to comment
TMifune Posted July 28, 2015 Author Share Posted July 28, 2015 Everyone follows a herd. Not having Facebook, is just the herd that doesn't use Facebook. Meh, it depends. If you're doing it because other people are doing it, it's following a herd. Personally I don't use Facebook because it would be too tempting to stalk exes and because it's hard not to compare your life against the perfect little snapshots of other people's lives and feel like you come up short. Even if you realize that those snapshots aren't accurate representations, sometimes they just get to you anyway. Link to comment
TMifune Posted July 28, 2015 Author Share Posted July 28, 2015 I would actually find it quite attractive that someone doesn't feel the need to follow the heard. I like to follow the hearing impaired! I know it was just a typo but I couldn't resist! Link to comment
Rosti87 Posted July 28, 2015 Share Posted July 28, 2015 Everyone follows a herd. Not having Facebook, is just the herd that doesn't use Facebook. Some herds are bigger and have more company than others. Link to comment
Tanzi Posted July 28, 2015 Share Posted July 28, 2015 Sportster, you surely know what I was trying to say! Having FB is a choice .... most of us choose to do it because ... well .... we want to get in on the game. There's nothing wrong with that. I have FB. Those that choose NOT to have FB are doing so because they don't feel compelled to have to or for more specific or personal reasons ... not necessarily because they are trying to follow a different or unique type of herd. It was just a form of expression. Maybe I should have worded it differently but .... Jeez .... why do some people like to over analyse obvious flippant comments, purposely missing the point? Link to comment
Tanzi Posted July 28, 2015 Share Posted July 28, 2015 I like to follow the hearing impaired! I know it was just a typo but I couldn't resist! Well in my defence, it was very late here in the UK! 😀 Link to comment
meozorchild Posted August 1, 2015 Share Posted August 1, 2015 It's a quick, superficial way to gauge someone's social status and value in the dating market. But, at the end of the day, it's a multi-billion-dollar internet fad. Great for promoting a product or advertising yourself as an artist/businessman, however. Side note: Narcissists on Facebook are instantly discernible, and it's extremely unattractive. Makes my groin itch. Link to comment
Hermes Posted August 1, 2015 Share Posted August 1, 2015 Yes, Meozorchild. "But, at the end of the day, it's a multi-billion-dollar internet fad." I cannot see that FB has any merit at all. Link to comment
Hermes Posted August 1, 2015 Share Posted August 1, 2015 "Another study (link is external) involving students who sought to go without media for 24 hours recorded their reactions to this, and included such feelings as: fretful, confused, anxious, irritable, insecure, nervous, restless, crazy, addicted, panicked, jealous, angry, lonely, dependent, depressed, jittery and paranoid. But near-constant engagement with social media can also have a negative impact. Facebook and Twitter can be time sinks at work and at home. They can make us less productive, but more importantly time spent on our social networks can actually undermine our flesh and blood social lives. " From: link removed Link to comment
pippy longstocking Posted August 1, 2015 Share Posted August 1, 2015 Ladies, Would you date a guy who didn't use Facebook at all? I did ...my ex didnt have it ..I joined then left , back on now though. If you want the truth I see it as a bonus after been on this forum ..I have never gone out with anyone and been on facebook with them and it seemingly drives everyone to class A stalkers who nearly drive themselves mad . Link to comment
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