Sometimes I think it really is all about looks....

[cursedgirl]

For me there is a difference between sexy and beautiful, sex is all about lust, sexual desire, though i think most women can be sexy. Beauty is harder to define, it can be about elegance, it can be about posture, personality etc. For me beauty is far more powerful than lust, thats me anyway. Im still a guy though beauty leads to lust as well. Im not into porn stars, they are cheap and easy, sorry if that causes offense, just not really attracted to them.

yeah that's what im saying.looking sweet/beautiful/pretty whatever..it can all be sexy.and can def. arouse guys.

I didn't say I wanted to look like a porn star, just that I look too innocent. There is a happy medium (and it's not Pam Anderson, lol!)

well i dont know what is " looking too innocent" as a woman in your age..but i suppose you can change it? shouldnt be hard.

[sjjohnson89]

yeah that's what im saying.looking sweet/beautiful/pretty whatever..it can all be sexy.and can def. arouse guys.

 

well i dont know what is " looking too innocent" as a woman in your age..but i suppose you can change it? shouldnt be hard.

 

I dont mind innocent, in fact i think i would be attracted to innocent types, havent met any in a while though. Guys can be aroused by pretty much any woman, not per individual guy as they have different tastes etc but on the whole, i dont think theres a woman out there who who some guy wouldnt find attractive. My opinion.

[BriarRose]

yeah that's what im saying.looking sweet/beautiful/pretty whatever..it can all be sexy.and can def. arouse guys.

 

well i dont know what is " looking too innocent" as a woman in your age..but i suppose you can change it? shouldnt be hard.

 

It is hard. I have short, curly hair (from chemo) - try making that sexy! I look like a schoolmarm. My clothes are not stylish because I am broke and can't buy new ones. My figure is okay, but I am only B cup on top.

[cursedgirl]

I dont mind innocent, in fact i think i would be attracted to innocent types, havent met any in a while though. Guys can be aroused by pretty much any woman, not per individual guy as they have different tastes etc but on the whole, i dont think theres a woman out there who who some guy wouldnt find attractive. My opinion.

however...we only want to attract the guys we are attracted to..i wouldnt be very happy if i were only attractive to old guys..for example.haha

[BriarRose]

however...we only want to attract the guys we are attracted to..i wouldnt be very happy if i were only attractive to old guys..for example.haha

 

I'm not looking for some hot guy. Just a nice guy. But even the nice guys want beautiful, sexy women.

[Sparkly Eyes]

You guys are being too hard on yourselves. I know plenty of average looking women in relationships.

[BriarRose]

You guys are being too hard on yourselves. I know plenty of average looking women in relationships.

 

We feel we are below average. Most people fall into "average".

[cursedgirl]

I'm not looking for some hot guy. Just a nice guy. But even the nice guys want beautiful, sexy women.

 

hahah that doesnt sound right ay..who says nice guys should just want average girls? also every girl is beautiful,in their own way. some are lucky to have found a guy who appreciates that..others..like me,are still struggling.lol i cant figure out why the guys choose other girls to be with but not me..when i asked them,they couldnt give me an answer as well..i suppose im stuck

[Sparkly Eyes]

We feel we are below average. Most people fall into "average".

 

Most of the below average women are that way because they have weight problems. You said you don't so I highly doubt you fall into that category.

[sjjohnson89]

however...we only want to attract the guys we are attracted to..i wouldnt be very happy if i were only attractive to old guys..for example.haha

 

Yeah, but for some that might be there thing lol. Basically im saying im open to different types of beauty, it will lead on to them being sexy even if technically they arent.

[Yaz]

Nice guys are the devil. Go for a friendly guy - much better

 

Nice guys arethe ones who go out of their way to be so nice they end up screwing you over. Saying they love you so they don't cause a fight, or seem like a mean person. Not telling you they had lunch with the sexy new receptionist because it'd hurt your feelings. It goes on.

 

Friendly guys are where it's at. If only they were friendlier... heh heh heh.

[BriarRose]

Most of the below average women are that way because they have weight problems. You said you don't so I highly doubt you fall into that category.

 

No, I have an average figure. But I don't feel like my face is that great, and my hair is crap. Decent skin, but I look tired from my medical stuff I went through.

[BriarRose]

Nice guys are the devil. Go for a friendly guy - much better

 

Nice guys arethe ones who go out of their way to be so nice they end up screwing you over. Saying they love you so they don't cause a fight, or seem like a mean person. Not telling you they had lunch with the sexy new receptionist because it'd hurt your feelings. It goes on.

 

Friendly guys are where it's at. If only they were friendlier... heh heh heh.

 

I don't know that I agree with that. I've met some decent guys in my life.

[Yaz]

I don't know that I agree with that. I've met some decent guys in my life.

 

I guess I'm talking about self-labeled nice guys, more than guys who are just plain nice. I try not to use the word nice, so I say friendly. It's the 'nice guy' label that turns me off, the stereotype.

[In the Dark]

Nice guys are the devil. Go for a friendly guy - much better

 

Nice guys arethe ones who go out of their way to be so nice they end up screwing you over. Saying they love you so they don't cause a fight, or seem like a mean person. Not telling you they had lunch with the sexy new receptionist because it'd hurt your feelings. It goes on.

 

Friendly guys are where it's at. If only they were friendlier... heh heh heh.

 

You interpretation of a nice guys just sounds like a liar to me who wants his cake and eat it.

 

Makes me think what category I actually fall under.

I thought I was one of the nice guys for a while.

But that was just my GFs interpretation of a nice guy.

 

I have learned a fair bit about myself since being here and what I write which leads me to believe I am not all that nice at all

I have my moments, but for the most part I am, brutally honest about situations whether someone likes it or not and I do not like seeing people get slammed for no reason.

 

Something for me to think about.

[BriarRose]

I am just feeling a little harder on myself since the guy I had a torch for for a few years saw recent pics of me and then dumped me. Was a blow. Made me feel like crap, even though I know it shouldn't.

[In the Dark]

^^ Even though you shouldn't?

Of course you're gong to be gutted!

I would!

Real confidence dropper.

Always sucks when someone you liked all of a sudden drops you like a sack of potatoes.

In this case I don't think there is much you can learn from it besides the fact he did not like what he saw.

Only thing I can think of is to pick yourself up from the situation.

 

Sorry to hear it happened

[BriarRose]

^^ Even though you shouldn't?

Of course you're gong to be gutted!

I would!

Real confidence dropper.

Always sucks when someone you liked all of a sudden drops you like a sack of potatoes.

In this case I don't think there is much you can learn from it besides the fact he did not like what he saw.

Only thing I can think of is to pick yourself up from the situation.

 

Sorry to hear it happened

 

Glad to know it's not just me that would feel that way after what happened. Gutted is exactly how I feel

 

I guess I knew it would end, I just didn't think it would be like that. He used to think I was beautiful (before the medical stuff).

[In the Dark]

Yeah well there is no way around the obvious reaction.

 

Sounds like this connection you had with this guy was always in a romantic way.

Of it was as a friendship I could see him still being around unless he does not like the company of women unless it is romantic in some way or another.

 

Well at least you can stub out the flame if he didn't do it already for you and give your arm a rest.

A few years is a long time to be holding a torch for someone.

[BriarRose]

Yeah well there is no way around the obvious reaction.

 

Sounds like this connection you had with this guy was always in a romantic way.

Of it was as a friendship I could see him still being around unless he does not like the company of women unless it is romantic in some way or another.

 

Well at least you can stub out the flame if he didn't do it already for you and give your arm a rest.

A few years is a long time to be holding a torch for someone.

 

I agree with all you said. I don't know which is worse - being dusted because he was no longer attracted to me of if it had been because he had met someone. Honestly, I think it would have been easier had it been for some other reason.

[sjjohnson89]

I agree with all you said. I don't know which is worse - being dusted because he was no longer attracted to me of if it had been because he had met someone. Honestly, I think it would have been easier had it been for some other reason.

 

I think either reason isnt any reason to get really depressed over, it shows to me that the guy wasnt for you, he left you when times werent as peachy. You want to be with someone that will stick by you through thick and thin, through all lifes obstacles. You dont want someone who does a runner BriarRose, thats not what its about.

[BriarRose]

I think either reason isnt any reason to get really depressed over, it shows to me that the guy wasnt for you, he left you when times werent as peachy. You want to be with someone that will stick by you through thick and thin, through all lifes obstacles. You dont want someone who does a runner BriarRose, thats not what its about.

 

I agree. It's just that I can't help that I got sick, and it's not like I look terrible, I just didn't expect he would end things when he saw the photos. Not sure why he called at all afterwards - I think so it wouldn't be so obvious? Because he felt badly?

[sjjohnson89]

I agree. It's just that I can't help that I got sick, and it's not like I look terrible, I just didn't expect he would end things when he saw the photos. Not sure why he called at all afterwards - I think so it wouldn't be so obvious? Because he felt badly?

 

Sure, relationships are great when the good times are flooding in, but its when the bad times come you know who your friends are so to speak. When a bad time came about for you he wasnt there for you, trust me, hes not worth beating yourself up about.

[BriarRose]

Sure, relationships are great when the good times are flooding in, but its when the bad times come you know who your friends are so to speak. When a bad time came about for you he wasnt there for you, trust me, hes not worth beating yourself up about.

 

Very true. But as a woman, it was a blow to have it come right after he saw the photos. I mean, it's not like I sent him pics of when I had no hair - they were just normal photos. I didn't hear from him for several days after that, and I just accepted it. Then he started calling again. I am not sure why.

[sjjohnson89]

Very true. But as a woman, it was a blow to have it come right after he saw the photos. I mean, it's not like I sent him pics of when I had no hair - they were just normal photos. I didn't hear from him for several days after that, and I just accepted it. Then he started calling again. I am not sure why.

 

Was he calling to make up? I know that looks are a very big deal for women, they are a big thing for guys too but i think we generally dont worry about it to the same degree. I understand why that made you feel bad when you sent the pics and got no return, just take the positive that the guy would appear not to be worth your time anyway.