Is it wrong to lose your virginity to a prostitute?

[Cognitive_Canine]

Pardon the mixed metaphor, but I couldn't talk my way out of a paper bag. I'm talking about being able to fake, say, junior-high-level social skills, before the girl eventually realizes my real gradeschool-level ones.

 

In MD's defense, it sounds like he wants a serious (if traditional) relationship. You're absolutely right, though--some of us avoid people as much as we can, save for sex.

 

Bluespiral, I know you're good guy. I know you aren't trying to trick anyone. You have little desire for social interactions, that's just how you're wired. And, when I meant "tricking people into sex", I actually wasn't talking about you. Your comment just mirrored how I think a lot of these guys think and I used it as a jumping off point.

 

I too had awful social skills. I was really stunted in middle school and high school and am very much a late bloomer. I had to actively fix this and learn how to be social. Sometimes it's a face when I meet someone new. And, it's definitely a face when I meet someone I don't particularily like. But, when I'm around good friends, it flows so naturally. So, I just try to be the person I am around friends and channel that when not in a comfortable or familiar situation.

 

As I've gotten older though, I realize that a lot of my friends (and heck, everyone) has had problems with their social skills. Does it really come natural to anyone? Just about everyone has felt lonely in a room full of people, has been smiling when wanting to scream. It's something I've come to realize and it's made life a lot easier on me. I think "maturing" is just slowly losing your weirdness (or at least learning to hide it better). I've practiced and trained to only show my weirdness to certain people, my friends. And, everyone else I sort of have to fake it a bit.

 

Some people, never comet to that conclusion. They think they are the odd one out, and that everyone else gets it perfectly. But, that's now how it is.

[The Wire]

Then why do you care then if all you see is whining?

 

Who said I did care? Guys going around spewing nonsense about how women are evil and all this crap need to grow up and stop looking for sympathy. Rule one of the game of life: Life isn't fair, get use to it, some of us may end up carrying the v-card for life, best be prepared for that. Does moaning about it help the situation? Nope, so why do it?

[Sparkly Eyes]

Then improve yourself. Aren't you fat? Well, work on losing weight and getting in shape, for starters.

 

See, this is what bothers me.... If a girl is overweight and complains about not getting dates, everyone will say oh ok lose weight. But for some reason, some guys think they should be a prize to women and men's look should just not matter. Time to wake up, women might not be as visual as men, but they are still pretty visual. Why do you think all these gym rats have it so easy? It's definitely not just because of their confidence.

 

If you have no looks, no money, and no good attitude, why on earth do you think you should be able to attract women?!

[jonny15]

Then improve yourself. Aren't you fat? Well, work on losing weight and getting in shape, for starters.

 

I doubt that is gonna improve my personality or anything like that.

 

And I am trying to work on losing weight.

[jonny15]

Finding someone who returns your affections truly does make it easier to be yourself. And while it doesn't seem like it now, you will have a lot to offer her.

 

It's possible, but very difficult to find someone like that.

 

I personally don't say much to anyone in public anymore.

 

No need to draw any negativity towards me.

[jonny15]

You just aren't comfortable with them at all.

 

I'm really not comfortable talking to anyone that isn't in my family.

 

Also, I know you hate alcohol and refuse to drink, a lot of women will be turned off by that. There are probably other things that you can work on as well.

 

I just can't stand drinking.

 

It's gross and messes your brain up.

 

But, you can't just do the same thing over and over again. I have one friend that tries to talk to a lot of women but he doesn't learn from his mistakes at all. He's awkward, uses the same opening lines again and again, has yet to learn how to keep conversation floating, and is filled with doubt that he goes in assuming he'll fail. After doing the exact same thing for a decade and more of dating, he still hasn't found a girl. Because, he's trying to find a girl who likes his pickup rather than changing his pickup to find girls (plural is important).

 

I just don't have anything to talk about.

 

Sure won't be trucks or cars. LOL

[jonny15]

Ok, that was one girl. Did you guys meet online? Maybe she was just looking for sex or you told her too early. Who knows. You can't go off of just one person.

 

there's nothing wrong with a perverted sense of humor. I have one myself. It's funny. I bet you have lots of other good traits/talents but you're just too down on yourself to see them.

 

I met her online.

 

Never met her in person.

 

We did talk about sex most of the time tho.

 

And I reallly have no talent at all.

[Fudgie]

I'm really not comfortable talking to anyone that isn't in my family.

 

 

 

I just can't stand drinking.

 

It's gross and messes your brain up.

 

 

 

I just don't have anything to talk about.

 

Sure won't be trucks or cars. LOL

 

You need to get used to talking to women. Practice, practice, practice.

 

There's nothing wrong with NOT drinking. I don't drink myself. I've been in college for 3 years and haven't had a drop. I only drink wine when I'm at home alone, with a good meal.

 

You don't have to drink to make friends or meet people. But you have to be okay with them drinking. But by all means, if you don't want to drink, don't do it. Order a soda or something. Too many guys get drunk too much anyway. Don't be one of them.

 

I met her online.

 

Never met her in person.

 

We did talk about sex most of the time tho.

 

And I reallly have no talent at all.

 

Well there's your answer. She was probably just after sex, considering that's all you talked about. Not a good person to be in a relationship with, IMO.

 

And you probably do have a talent, you just haven't found it yet.

[jonny15]

There's nothing wrong with NOT drinking. I don't drink myself. I've been in college for 3 years and haven't had a drop. I only drink wine when I'm at home alone, with a good meal.

 

You don't have to drink to make friends or meet people. But you have to be okay with them drinking. But by all means, if you don't want to drink, don't do it. Order a soda or something. Too many guys get drunk too much anyway. Don't be one of them.

 

I simply don't like people getting drunk.

 

It's a turn off.

 

Not that I go to places where people drink.

 

Well there's your answer. She was probably just after sex, considering that's all you talked about. Not a good person to be in a relationship with, IMO.

 

And you probably do have a talent, you just haven't found it yet.

 

I guess she might have been after sex, but then again....so was I.

 

And I don't have any talent.

 

I have never been good at anything.

 

I don't see how one is gonna discover something while nearing 30.

[Fudgie]

I simply don't like people getting drunk.

It's a turn off.

Not that I go to places where people drink.

 

 

 

I guess she might have been after sex, but then again....so was I.

And I don't have any talent.

I have never been good at anything.

I don't see how one is gonna discover something while nearing 30.

 

Then avoid people who get drunk. That's fine.

Lots of people drink without getting drunk. I am that way when I get home. I do it for the taste. Trust me, if wine could taste just as great without any alcohol in it, I'd be all over it.

Getting drunk, especially on purpose, is what immature people do because they think it's "cool". But loads of people drink without getting impaired and you probably won't be able to tell the difference when talking to to them.

 

It sounds like you just haven't gotten out enough or explored yourself enough to know what your talents are.

 

Anyway, this is turning into a back and forth. If you want to talk further, feel free to PM me but I think it's best if I left this thread as I have nothing else new to say.

[MD Geist]

Who said I did care? Guys going around spewing nonsense about how women are evil and all this crap need to grow up and stop looking for sympathy. Rule one of the game of life: Life isn't fair, get use to it, some of us may end up carrying the v-card for life, best be prepared for that. Does moaning about it help the situation? Nope, so why do it?

 

You posted a response so you care to a degree.

 

Why should I be one of those "Some" that will end up going through life without sex? Thats some of us going to live in the ghetto for life, F that, I have my choice even if its the wrong one.

[Shepard]

See, this is what bothers me.... If a girl is overweight and complains about not getting dates, everyone will say oh ok lose weight. But for some reason, some guys think they should be a prize to women and men's look should just not matter. Time to wake up, women might not be as visual as men, but they are still pretty visual. Why do you think all these gym rats have it so easy? It's definitely not just because of their confidence.

 

If you have no looks, no money, and no good attitude, why on earth do you think you should be able to attract women?!

 

Gym rats have it easy? Hardly. I am a gym rat and most girls tell me I have too many muscles. I am pretty puny by my standards so...

[MD Geist]

See, this is what bothers me.... If a girl is overweight and complains about not getting dates, everyone will say oh ok lose weight. But for some reason, some guys think they should be a prize to women and men's look should just not matter. Time to wake up, women might not be as visual as men, but they are still pretty visual. Why do you think all these gym rats have it so easy? It's definitely not just because of their confidence.

 

 

 

Okay first off if your over 400lbs, out of shape, zero disire, beer belly, bad habbit kind of guy and you think your going to land a woman who takes care of herself, has a beach body and such you've got another thing coming. I'm overweight, I've lost close to 100lbs now since 2005, its not been easy and I've got another 60+ to go before I feel content with myself. I would never go after a smaller more petite girl who has that beach body unless she persues me. Yes I've had that happen to me in the past but it was during a time when I was blind and now she's married but it can happen. I often seen guys who are ugly with sexy girl friends. Why? Because some of these guys have great paying jobs and spoil them.

 

Everyone has good looks especially some overweight women it really depends on how they carry themselves out in public, if you throw on a pair of sweats, flip flops and non matching colors you'll get attention but for the wrong reasons however if a person just takes time in their apparence they can maxiumise their full potential regardless of how big they are, i've seen guys in clubs that are beyond 375lbs dancing with smaller girls.

 

If you have no looks, no money, and no good attitude, why on earth do you think you should be able to attract women?!

 

 

This really justifys my tainted views on women were if you don't Look like Justin Timberlake with Donald Trumps wealth and the understanding of Doctor Phil then why bother trying or keep trying? Women won't like you anyways, you have to be almost perfect or else your not good enough. People get College degrees for two purposes in life these days 1) To get a Job 2) To get a girlfriend.

 

MD, if women are evil, just don't date them. Apparently they don't like to date you much either or you wouldn't be here complaining. Don't you think it would just be easier to kiss dating goodbye?

 

I have no other choice. What are the other alturnatives? Seriously what is?.

 

I haven't even been in a simple date! all thats been happening to me is getting screwed by girls and them turning me down no matter what I do they all turn me down. But this topic is about seeing a pro, not dating.

[Sparkly Eyes]

Gym rats have it easy? Hardly. I am a gym rat and most girls tell me I have too many muscles. I am pretty puny by my standards so...

 

Every gym rat I know had it easy, providing they were social enough and got out of their house. Girls come onto them all the time.

[Shepard]

Every gym rat I know had it easy, providing they were social enough and got out of their house. Girls come onto them all the time.

 

Do they flash their muscles in their faces all the time?

[Sparkly Eyes]

Do they flash their muscles in their faces all the time?

 

What do you mean? When someone is in good shape, it shows no matter what they wear.

[Shepard]

What do you mean? When someone is in good shape, it shows no matter what they wear.

 

I disagree. How would you tell that?

[Fudgie]

I disagree. How would you tell that?

 

You can see the muscles. If a ripped guy wears a normal t-shirt (not tight) maybe you can't see his abs but you can see that he DOESN'T have a beer belly. You can see his ripped arms as well. People who are in shape also tend to have excellent posture. You CAN tell.

[Sparkly Eyes]

I disagree. How would you tell that?

 

oh boy, I can tell. I can easily say by looking if a guy is skinny, muscular or fat. It reminds me of this guy who said guys can always tell a girl's breast size, no matter what they wear (this I disagree with).

 

Fudgie is right. You can see the muscles...even if just their forearm is out.

[Cognitive_Canine]

I often seen guys who are ugly with sexy girl friends. Why? Because some of these guys have great paying jobs and spoil them.

 

 

This really justifys my tainted views on women were if you don't Look like Justin Timberlake with Donald Trumps wealth and the understanding of Doctor Phil then why bother trying or keep trying? Women won't like you anyways, you have to be almost perfect or else your not good enough.

 

 

Why are you so hooked on money? Does personality not play any role in dating for you?

 

And, if women needed those standards, NO ONE would have a girlfriend. Not a single guy. Your outlook is outrageous.

[Fudgie]

No one is perfect. Men are imperfect and so are women.

 

I don't get the money thing either, honestly.

[Sparkly Eyes]

Why are you so hooked on money? Does personality not play any role in dating for you?

 

And, if women needed those standards, NO ONE would have a girlfriend. Not a single guy. Your outlook is outrageous.

 

He is just being a drama queen. And they say women are illogical.

[Shepard]

oh boy, I can tell. I can easily say by looking if a guy is skinny, muscular or fat. It reminds me of this guy who said guys can always tell a girl's breast size, no matter what they wear (this I disagree with).

 

Fudgie is right. You can see the muscles...even if just their forearm is out.

 

I work out and I don't think you would think that just by looking at my forearm.

 

image removed

[Cognitive_Canine]

No one is perfect. Men are imperfect and so are women.

 

I don't get the money thing either, honestly.

'

 

Honestly, MD, Fudgie and I both have boyfriends. I know mine is far from perfect (still loveable) and I'm sure Fudgie has a lot to say about how loveably imperfect her boyfriend is.

 

My boyfriend drives a 20 year old car without air conditioning and the passenger door doesn't open. I love that car. We go 50/50 on just about everything. His family isn't rich, comfortable, but certainly not rich. When I met him, he had very low self esteem because all of his past girlfriends cheated on him. I think he's good looking but he isn't conventionally good looking (I like interesting faces better than generic ones). He has a roman nose and has really bad eczema on his hands and feet. He has a crooked smile (which is adorable).

 

You do not need to be perfect to get a mate. I'm not perfect, he's not perfect. You do need good qualities though. For everyone, they have things they like. You'll never be everyone's kind of guy but you can increase your pool of interest by working on things like social skills and humour.

[MD Geist]

Why are you so hooked on money? Does personality not play any role in dating for you?

 

And, if women needed those standards, NO ONE would have a girlfriend. Not a single guy. Your outlook is outrageous.

 

Personality seems to not matter with women.

 

I've been overtaken many times for a robot that makes more than I do. It happens to me quite frequently actually.

 

The ones who have girlfriends are those who make good money or look good themselves.