Is it wrong to lose your virginity to a prostitute?

[MD Geist]

First of all, you have a terrible attitude towards women, as everyone who comments on your threads tells you. Just terrible.

 

 

Can you blame me? Put yourself in my shoes for a minute. Every girl you've ever tried to get with basically does you wrong from the beginning. But nobody seems to care, women are always the victim. But when I hear stories from guys like me and IwishIknew and countless others who have gone through life dateless we are the freaks, we the wrong, yet we have nothing other than tried, You know what I'm sick and tired of it! Yes I'm bitter and Yes I'm expressing my frustrations and anger, I hope other men in my shoes stand and take notice.

 

 

Second, stop insinuating that single mothers aren’t “decent.” It’s ridiculous. If you don’t want to date a woman with kids, fine! Just stop with your ridiculous posts about how they are “near junk.” It’s awful.

 

 

Ok, but when brought up a suggestion of "Take what you can get" I want to make it clear where my heart is in that department, many here keep on trying to convince me otherwise.

Third, I see from your older posts that you are over 100 lbs over weight. Have you been working on that? If you are still that much over weight, then of course it’s going to have a major impact on your dating prospects.

 

 

Have I been working on that? I can tell you that I'm no couch patato! I do a mile per day walking, eat as best as I can, and other things to try and be healthly even then losing weight isn't working out for me. I have lost close to 100lbs already and have roughly 60+lbs to go before I meet my goal. All I can do is what I can do but it seems to never be enough regardless of what I do there's always someone else out there that can do better. Its sad and pathetic to put it that way but its the truth.

 

 

Didn't you know that being overweight is only a bad thing for women?

 

No its not. There's men out there who will date overweight women.

[Sparkly Eyes]

actually, studies show that obese women have it much harder than obese men in the dating world.

[Shinobie]

Before anyone says it, yay the idiot Shinobie is back. I have been away from this site for about a year now and I have never felt this good about myself in all my life. I'm not saying this site was the only thing keeping me so negative but it certainly helped me stay that way. I have been improving so much this last year and I'm currently back on my feet working like a normal human being again. Saving money every paycheck bit by bit to improve my life even further. It took me awhile to realize just how trashy this world can be but I finally matured and came to the realization that a lot of it is. I have finally accepted the fact that a very huge part of this world's population is so immoral and selfish. We live in a "me" world and nobody can change that. It's not about "what can I give someone" but "what can I receive?". I have finally been around all the type of people that i could clearly remember back when I was a teenager. Like some random girl that went to my high school with that is on my facebook for example. The typical "bestie" girl who has her best friend that shes constantly around since relationships always fail. One of the girls that always goes for the typical hot jerk that only thinks about pleasing himself. Then when she gets played she always has to post about how guys are such jerks and girls don't need them. Then a ton of the besties come on and commenting about how much they agree.

 

I know I can be and have been a very critical person but it has always mostly been about those are really immoral or think about themselves. I know I shouldn't be critical at all but I want to state the other side of things. I feel and know that I am a very kind guy that wants to treat the woman I'm with like she is everything to me. You are suppose to love and cherish your significant other, not treat them like garbage. So many people go from relationship to relationship just to be in one with the purpose to just be boyfriend and girlfriend. Thinking about things like "is the sex going to be good enough?" or other things that are just so shallow and stupid It seems like most people just have sex with someone that they aren't even in love with. I don't see how you could be in love with someone then say the sex is horrible and want to leave them. O yah and darn straight I'm still a virgin. That tag doesn't hold much significance to me anymore other then the fact that I want to and still have the chance to give it to the love of my life. I don't think I have to have had sex to know whether or not I don't want to be shallow or immoral.

 

I hope I don't say anything to wrong but I might There were many factors contributing to my depression and this site was one of them. It felt like everyday that i came here, it just fed my depression and made me more unhappy all the time. I guess it's like anything else. Things should come in moderation instead of all the time because too much of something can be bad for you. Everything here always felt like a big time bashfest and I know that i definitely contributed to a lot of it. The conclusion I came to and have always known is that there are just a lot trashy girls AND guys out there. People in general can be really horrible and selfish. I always felt and knew that I was always overlooked. I was just always waiting for someone to come into my life, building up so much for them. I knew that I always wanted to devote, love, and care for one woman for a lifetime. Give everything to them, cause that is just what I have always believed in. I just wanted to be with one person and never wanted to do what everyone else does.

 

actually, studies show that obese women have it much harder than obese men in the dating world.

 

I know that you and this article are stating that not all men don't want an overweight woman but the majority do. I have a girlfriend now @_@( and no I didn't come back here right when I got one, I have been with her for about 6 months), and my girlfriend has weight on her. It doesn't bother me and I love her with all my heart. I just want to put it out there that I am a guy and that it in fact does not bother me. If you are stating a study I guess I want to state something that I have noticed for awhile and that I have mentioned in the past. Why on so many forums out there and everywhere else does it always seem like its guys who are extremely lonely? Why does it seem like its usually men who have a hard time getting dates? I have noticed on many forums I have gone to it has always been the same trend. There are always posts saying that they are 20+ years old and still dateless. It seems like about 95% of these posts are men and the other 5% are women.

 

I have been improving and have been trying to improve my life. I feel like a completely different person in a way by how I function now but I still have the same beliefs/thoughts. I have definitely noticed after being away from this site for a year that negative criticism can be very bad for anyone. People do it a lot and I have done it a lot myself. I'm sorry cause I probably did plenty of it in this post too

[randomgirl59]

No. Just...no. Not true at all.

 

I agree with pretty much the rest of your post, and I really didn't even want to return to this thread as all the negativity just feeds MD Geist and the rest of the people here (including myself) further, but saying that most guys want overweight girls is the biggest lie I have ever heard. I'm really happy that there are guys like you who can be attracted to bigger girls, but the majority of guys are not. I have been on the bigger side ever since puberty. On good days I dont even consider myself fat, just really curvey as I am taller, dont have rolls of flab spilling out nor do I eat a ton of junk food. Still, according to today's society I would be considered fat. This is proven because of the very little male attention I get. Even with a less than perfect body, having a decent face (symmetrical, feminine) isn't even good enough. I also see very few overweight women with men when I go out as well. They are usually with other female friends. Most overweight couples consist of both the male and female being overweight, and they look to be older too...possibly married or with kids.

 

Men are more visual, men care more about looks. This is just fact. Men on here even stated it. I think women care a lot about looks too, but not as much as men. They are willing to overlook some aspects over others. How many times do you hear a "fat chick" joke? I hear one probably every few days. Compare that to "fat dude" jokes...there are none.

 

Yea...out of all the things I've read on ENA, I dont think I've ever disagreed more than with this lol. Take it from a fat girl, men do not prefer us. Some do, but the majority do not. And even if they did, they dont want to be seen with us because they are so afraid of what their friends and society would say.

 

Also another thing to note, I suspect that maybe the reason there are more men on ENA saying they are dateless is because they dont have friends to confide in like most females do. Society tells men they should just bottle up their problems and if they confide to their friends about this stuff, chances are they will make fun of them. I think this attitude is ridiculous, unfair, and unhealthy, but unfortunately until people let go of archaic thinking, more men are just going to vent online because of the anonymity (which increases rude behavior) and cuz they dont have any other source.

 

With that being said, unless you want to make an honest effort to truly change, then you need to suck it up and deal with your social situation, that goes for everyone. Kudos to you Shinobie for making a positive change in your life.

[Mr. Franklin]

Like I said earlier most people do not understand dateless people's situations. You can't just tell us to go out there and date. It is not simple when you have NO options. To tell us we are only looking for status and sex is ridiculous. We could say the same thing about you before you were ever in a relationship. This is NOT a double standard. Finally dateless people cannot control their situations. We can ask all the women out as we want, but at the end of the day they make the choice to not date us. We can't force someone who love us nor date us.

 

Randomgirl

 

Yes, there are some men who like bigger women, but the majority do not. There are groups and sites just for dating bigger women. Have you looked into them?

 

I must say I hate it when I see a big guy who refuses to date a big girl. I think that is hypocritical. However, I do understand why slender, tone, and built guys refuse to date bigger girls. They take care of themselves and deserve the same in return.

[randomgirl59]

How many times does it need to be pounded into people's heads that slender does not automatically equal healthy or someone that "takes care of themselves" have you seriously never seen a thin person eat a burger? ever heard of something called anorexia and bulimia? come on man.

 

Toned and built guys I understand, but if a thin guy is constantly cramming junk in his face (and I see this often with my male friends) then he's as much a hypocrite as the fat guys that don't date fat girls. If he refuses on aesthetic reasons, fine. But dont be a hypocritical jerk just because your clogged arteries dont show on the outside. I cant stand people who are not living healthy lifestyles, yet think they get a free pass to criticize someone else's health just because they're thin. I can understand why this happens though. Many people who are blessed with simple things in life like a good metabolism, or natural confidence, often take these things for granted.

 

And no I dont bother with those bbw dating sites or any dating sites for that matter because each day I just care less and less about dating or finding someone. And that would honestly be my advice to all the people here who are struggling so much. If someone truly feels they have no options, or that they just cant go out there and date, then give up. Stop caring. Force yourself. You may not completely get it out of your system, but it does get easier by the day if you are determined not to care. I'm doing it, and I'm only determined with very few things in my life. But let me guess, that's not an option either, right?

[Mr. Franklin]

I don't mean slender as in sick. I mean slender as in healthy. Slender with meat and small muscles on a man's body.

 

Giving up is always an option. It's actually been on my mind for the past year as well. I was born with deformed ears and a slender, but healthy frame. In every school my status was the worst looking guy in school. It kinda made me angry when I noticed a girl working at a store with deformed ears refusing to notice me when I was at the registrar. Her hair was not hiding her ears at the moment because she accidentally brushed her hair back while moving. Oh well at least she can comb her hair and let it grow long to hide her deformity. While I have the either pay thousands of dollars for a surgery that is only 30 minutes to 2 hours long or give up. It rarely takes more than an hour. At this point giving up feels better for me then having surgery because that is like paying someone to love me.

[Wayfara]

The first way rejection is an insult is by how it was done. Telling someone something negative about them in a rejection such as weight issues, a negative physical feature, negative body language(when a girl looks disgusted that this guy asked her out). If a woman ignores a man then that is very degrading. That shows to man the woman thinks she is too good to at least give him a response.

 

Everything can be an insult by how it's done, even a compliment if done with irony. And letting someone down is always hard, the rejected will almost always get a bit hurt. Some men don't want to get the rejection verbally, they rather want the girl to show they are not interested by other means (like ignoring). Some men want an honest answer, a descriptive list to why the girl isn't interested (like being brutally honest). Some men wants the “it's not you, it's me” rejection, some men don't want the girl to be too nice when rejecting because it's easier to move on if she isn't... It's hard to make everyone happy. Unless she takes joy in rejecting you in an unnecessary cruel way don't take the rejection as a personal insult.

 

The second way rejection is an insult is by how many times a guy is rejected by women. If a guy has been rejected over 20 times and more than that is pretty insulting. That tells guys they are not good enough in many aspects of dating and love.

 

If the girls you ask haven't given you any signs of liking you that way I don't think it's abnormal to get rejected by 20 in a row. It's more of an exception than a rule that attraction sparks in, I don't think I'm attracted to even one guy of one hundred. When asking out I think most people go with the safe cards. Usually a relationship starts with both parties giving each other escalating signs of interest until it's obvious that there is a mutual like.

 

If I would sense a guy would get offended if I didn't go out with him I would think he has some huge ego for thinking he has the right to my yes (why else would he get offended?). With that attitude I would feel he's more concerned about getting a relationship from me than me wanting it with him. Dates and relationships can't be deserved, they happen because both parties want it to happen.

 

Can you blame me? Put yourself in my shoes for a minute. Every girl you've ever tried to get with basically does you wrong from the beginning.

 

All the one hundred girls you have asked did you wrong? What wrongs did they do you?

 

The perfect rejection doesn't exist and when put on the spot most people get nervous, if they weren't intentionally out to hurt you don't dwell on it. If all the one hundred girls were intentionally cruel to you you're probably going after bad girls.

 

I deserve better. Thats a fact, I'm Intelligent and I take care of myself and have my **** together, I don't need to be stepping up and providing for kids that aren't mine to begin with, I have a bright future its only natural that I ask of someone to be brought into my life who has their life together without zero drama as well.

 

I deserve better than whats been offered to me, what has been given to me has been near junk and is not quality what so ever. *

 

Conditional love is simple, its all under the "Conditions" you meet and as long as you continue to meet those conditions your loved by that other person which is why I don't date single mothers b/c that is a conditional relationship, the kid comes first and as long as I step up to the plate yeah she'll love me but the moment I don't well thats the end of that.

 

You have conditions on what kind of woman you want to date, like “not being a single mother”. You probably have conditions like “not being a serial cheater”, “not being a gold digger” too and so on. Would you love your girlfriend if she no longer met the “not being a serial cheater” condition? I would hope not, that would make you a doormat. It's possible to have conditions and not have them to be about the partner not getting disfigured, severely injured etc, the conditions could be about something else, like the partner not being an abuser and that the partner should be a good person.

 

Yes I'm bitter and Yes I'm expressing my frustrations and anger

 

Well can you give any good reason to why women should date bitter angry men who resent women (besides of selfish reasons like you wanting love and sex)?

 

You can't count with women being so altruistic that they will have a relationship with you just because you want it. A relationship is a lot of work so of course people want the relationship to be worth the pain. You want to get love from women, women want something out of a relationship too. Maybe you would be willing to give love in return, but being angry, bitter and resenting women is not a good way of showing that. As long you keep up with the resentment you are going to need a small miracle to get a decent non-desperate woman interested in you.

 

Is your anger, bitterness and resentment really worth it for you? Well then you have to accept there is a good chance you'll never have a date. And if hating women is so important to you that you rather keep hating them than having a shot of love with them, then I suppose seeing a prostitute is a good way to lose your virginity without having to lose your bad attitude. The experience might even help you to feed your mind with even more resentment, anger and bitterness.

[jonny15]

Random comment.

 

I'd without doubt date and even marry a single mother before i'd ever give a hooker the time of day.

[The_Seeker]

Random comment.

 

I'd without doubt date and even marry a single mother before i'd ever give a hooker the time of day.

 

Word. I would to.

[Shepard]

MD_Geist, you sound clinically depressed; obsessing about your lack of women/sex isn't going to change your situation. The reason I suggest you might be clinically depressed is because you systematically ignore all the suggestions made for you. I was clinically depressed once too; one lives in a fog and the only thing that is there is the depression and whatever else accompanies it, in your case your obsession with this topic. I guarantee posting on ENA will not help either; this place tends to depress more than it helps. As I said, you are needlessly obsessing, but I think that obsession is likely a part of a greater depression.

[Sparkly Eyes]

You know, I think one reason is that girls don't tend to go on and on about it and like randomgirl said, perhaps Internet forums are the only place guys can actually open up about their problems. Many girls have come here, made a few posts about how they got rejected and how no one approaches them and then stopped talking about it constantly. I doesn't necessarily means that girls are less frustrated, but perhaps they can control themselves better and they don't exactly see the point in constantly complaining.

 

I honestly think I have seen the same amount of women complaining about not being able to have anyone here as men, perhaps even more. There are just some male posters here that post quite a lot about their lack of luck with women.

[Cognitive_Canine]

What about the girl that blatantly hit on you that you made no move on?

[Cognitive_Canine]

Yes its out there. Unconditional love happens, have you ever see those who stand by their husbands or wives while they have a diasease or have been severely injured and have become disfigured? They stand by their partner because they love them no matter what, no matter how bad things get they stick together.

 

Conditional love is simple, its all under the "Conditions" you meet and as long as you continue to meet those conditions your loved by that other person which is why I don't date single mothers b/c that is a conditional relationship, the kid comes first and as long as I step up to the plate yeah she'll love me but the moment I don't well thats the end of that.

 

I also do not believe in unconditional love. I ask that the person does not cheat on me, hurt me, break up with me, abuse me, doesn't change completely, continues to care about what I think.

 

These are all conditions of my love.

[Kantriakhor]

So you mean to tell me in order to have a relationship I need to become a father? I see other people out there who have relationships and no kids, why can't I have that? I don't see any rules that state I need to take what I can get. I don't want that in my life, I deserve better than whats been offered to me, what has been given to me has been near junk and is not quality what so ever. You expect me to work with broken relationships and bad situations and call them Decent? No thats setting my self up for unhappiness for life.

 

I mean this with any due respect.

 

1 - Never said that. If you want to fish, try a pond, not my posts.

2 - If a woman likes you, and no other woman seems to (given your attitude), writing her off because she has a kid under the false-assumption you must now be come the father or that it's a broken situation is shallow.

3 - No one deserves anything. We work to earn things in life but we should never believe we're owed something. You build yourself up with this ego of yours yet can't see how the attitude you show here is a good reason for why you can't seem to get into a relationship that you deem yourself "worthy" of.

4 - The attitude you have her is setting yourself up for unhappiness, any other alternative would be an improvement.

[Shepard]

I mean this with any due respect.

 

1 - Never said that. If you want to fish, try a pond, not my posts.

2 - If a woman likes you, and no other woman seems to (given your attitude), writing her off because she has a kid under the false-assumption you must now be come the father or that it's a broken situation is shallow.

3 - No one deserves anything. We work to earn things in life but we should never believe we're owed something. You build yourself up with this ego of yours yet can't see how the attitude you show here is a good reason for why you can't seem to get into a relationship that you deem yourself "worthy" of.

4 - The attitude you have her is setting yourself up for unhappiness, any other alternative would be an improvement.

 

Pretty much what I said and I agree completely. Constantly posting here is making him unhappier.

[MD Geist]

MD_Geist, you sound clinically depressed; obsessing about your lack of women/sex isn't going to change your situation. The reason I suggest you might be clinically depressed is because you systematically ignore all the suggestions made for you. I was clinically depressed once too; one lives in a fog and the only thing that is there is the depression and whatever else accompanies it, in your case your obsession with this topic. I guarantee posting on ENA will not help either; this place tends to depress more than it helps. As I said, you are needlessly obsessing, but I think that obsession is likely a part of a greater depression.

 

 

What are you talking about?

 

I'm not depressed, I'm angry, you mean to tell me that being pissed off is now being depressed?

 

2 - If a woman likes you, and no other woman seems to (given your attitude), writing her off because she has a kid under the false-assumption you must now be come the father or that it's a broken situation is shallow.

 

Wrong!

 

Its this kind of thinking that really gets under my skin with people were they act like kids are like Dogs or cats, not a big deal but the fact is the moment that relationship becomes serious guess what you become a father and there's no working around it cause if you don't except her child your out the door. Its very rarely that a single mother doesn't comes from a bad situation most of the time there's baby daddy drama, drama between the kids and such, you just caught in the middle of and on top of that the kids come first which they should but there should be a period of time were you as the man should come first before they even come into the picture. Further more she's not going to love you as much as her childrens father, you are expendable. So yes I'm going to write them off because they have kids, I don't want to deal with that at all. Even if I have nothing to work with id rather be alone than be in a situation I don't want to be in.

 

All the one hundred girls you have asked did you wrong? What wrongs did they do you?

 

Oh jezz I don't even know were to begin everything from being led on to the mind games to the lies.

[Wayfara]

Oh jezz I don't even know were to begin everything from being led on to the mind games to the lies.

 

Well if they were all liars toying around with you they can't have been nice girls, they were probably players. Sometimes women complain about only meeting jerks, and they think all men are jerks because of their experiences, but it isn't true, there are many nice guys out there. The same is true for you, you have only met female jerks and you think all females must be jerks because of your experience, but it isn't true, there are many nice girls out there, it's only a matter of finding them. But when you do meet the nice girls you should be concerned about giving off positive friendly vibes, instead of hostile ones that you probably give off now as you seem very angry.

[Shepard]

Common reaction in depressed people is denial. You seem very clearly depressed to me; I know because I was depressed too.

[greywolf]

You've complained several times that women aren't attracted to you, and now you're saying that some women are in fact attracted to you, however, they're not good enough for you. It's fine to have to have deal-breakers, but when you're the one that's rejecting the women who are into you, I don't know why you're so upset.

[greywolf]

Yes its out there. Unconditional love happens, have you ever see those who stand by their husbands or wives while they have a diasease or have been severely injured and have become disfigured? They stand by their partner because they love them no matter what, no matter how bad things get they stick together.

 

Conditional love is simple, its all under the "Conditions" you meet and as long as you continue to meet those conditions your loved by that other person which is why I don't date single mothers b/c that is a conditional relationship, the kid comes first and as long as I step up to the plate yeah she'll love me but the moment I don't well thats the end of that.

 

No it's not. How many people would stick with someone who raped their own children or murdered someone else? Love is never conditional; not human love anyway.

[Mr. Franklin]

What about the girl that blatantly hit on you that you made no move on?

 

I actually got an upcoming update about that in my journal!

 

MD Geist,

 

Have single mothers shown interest in you? I don't think you should look at single mothers as a negative aspect about children. This is a great opportunity for you to make a difference in a child's life. The kid might has a beatdown dad who does not care about his child. You could find love in a single mother. Also have you found yourself physically attracted to single mothers? You may at least want to give it one try and you never know what can happen.

[Mr. Franklin]

You've complained several times that women aren't attracted to you, and now you're saying that some women are in fact attracted to you, however, they're not good enough for you. It's fine to have to have deal-breakers, but when you're the one that's rejecting the women who are into you, I don't know why you're so upset.

 

Sounds like his main problem is that single mothers have interest in him, and not women without children.

 

In my opinion the only time I have the attitude "I refuse to raise another man's child" is if the woman I am with cheated on me and had the child while in a relationship with me.

[greywolf]

MD Geist, I don't know your background, but what things have women done to lead you on? The reason I ask is that sometimes it's easy to get interest confused. For example, there have been a couple of guys who have accused me of leading them on. It was when I was younger and still influenced by a culture that isn't good at rejecting people. Guys would ask me for my number, and they'd ask me out. I'd always say no because I was busy (which was true), but I never gave them an outright rejection. Then they'd call me to talk often, and honestly, I hate chatting with people. I don't even call my friends to chat.

 

Later I grew some balls and told them that I would never be interested in going out with them, and some accused me of leading them on. The problems I have with that is this: I never promised anything to these guys. Most of the time they were never 100% clear about what they wanted either. Asking me to 'hang out' could also be interpreted as platonic, but whatever.

[randomgirl59]

Slender but healthy looking can be subject for debate as well, since you really dont know a person's lifestyle just by looks. Men can develop at least some muscle easier, even if they dont work out (from what I've heard anyway) but I dont want to argue this so lets just agree to disagree.

 

As for your ears, I wouldn't look at it as paying someone to love you. If this is a medical deformity, why not fix it if you think it will improve your life? and its not superficial like plastic surgery, which is just "fixing" things that weren't bad to begin with. As for the girl with the same problem, yea maybe she refused to notice you because of that, but there could be other reasons too. Maybe she felt self-conscious about herself because she saw someone with the same issue, maybe she already has a boyfriend or isn't interested in dating, or maybe she found you unattractive for other reasons. Maybe she was also too shy to talk to you. I've ignored and averted my eyes from cute guys before because of shyness and a "why bother" attitude. So there are many reasons why someone may ignore another. Plus she was working in a store. I've worked retail before, its hell and I have no interest in conversing with customers lol.

 

Anyway, I'm not going to sugar coat it, as I agree and can relate. If you have lots of evidence pertaining to your unattractiveness, then you cant really deny it. However, not getting men or women doesn't only have to do with your looks. Yea, looks are important, but if you have a healthy outlook on life, and aren't a bitter jerk, then your chances will improve even if you aren't the best looking person. I think guys are luckier, because there are women who will overlook unattractiveness, more so than men will overlook unattractiveness in a female. Though I have heard stories about not so great looking women getting men because of their confident, good natured personalities. I also know a guy with a physical deformity who has had a girlfriend and sex before, so its not impossible. And no, he isn't rich. He does have a fun personality though.

 

Basically, I think if someone is going to give up like we're considering, they should be lacking in both looks and personality. If they've got a decent personality and have a healthy outlook, then all hope is not lost, even if they're not that good looking. Beauty is also in the eye of the beholder, so while an unattractive person may not appeal to the masses, there will at least be some people out there who find them attractive in one way or another.

 

This is just my opinion on the matter though.