THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE, Part 2

[northpickle]

The ex is out of your life. If you are feeling any pain it is self induced. Quit worrying about what they are feeling and just concentrate on yourself. It may be hard but it is part of the process of letting go.

 

Hey, I know, I'm a lot better this morning, it was just a complete shock and it hurt me I suppose. You're right, it doesn't matter what he's thinking

[Mariana123]

Day 7.

 

Today I was really close to breaking NC. A part of me thinks that if I did break NC we would be able to talk about our relationship and then we would get back together or I'd finally get closure. But I must stay strong because he eventually will talk to me.

[businessman]

Day 4 of no contact. Had a sick today today but actually have not thought about him nearly as much as I did yesterday. We broke up in July, and even post-break-up, the longest we have gone without talking has been 4 days. So once tomorrow comes around, I will have beaten my personal record, hahaha.

 

Sometimes I honestly feel like a loser having to post on this forum and keep track of how many times I haven't contact him.... but being in love made me become so overwhelmed with emotion that I truly lost myself. I became someone I don't recognize - someone I am not proud of being.

 

 

For anyone who is unsure, NO CONTACT IS THE WAY TO GO! Contacting your ex-love again just makes things so much harder. I wish I had realized this 5 months ago, but better late than never, right?

[businessman]

Also, although it may sound cliche, I've learned something really important through all of this:

 

Never lose yourself in love.

[jeepman41]

Also, although it may sound cliche, I've learned something really important through all of this:

 

Never lose yourself in love.

 

 

That usually happens to the person who has the most emotional investment in the relationship.

[jbug]

i really want to joint this thread, can i do nic?

 

i work where she lives.

[The walkingman]

I think after 24 days of NC I will send her a happy thanksgiving text on Thursday... don't know if I should say more in the text or not.

[businessman]

end of day 4 and he just texted me telling me something i might fight interesting. not texting baaaaaaack. haha

[jbug]

i really want to joint this thread, can i do nic?

 

i work where she lives.

 

any thoughts? please

[jeepman41]

any thoughts? please

 

NIC means No Initiated Contact but the thread is open to anyone. Some people believe in hard core NC as a way of healing and getting over a relationship. Are you contemplating reconciliation or what are your motives for asking this question?

[northpickle]

Day 25

 

For the first time since breaking up 12 weeks ago, last night I felt a sense of inner calm, I'm not sure why but it was amazing. A sense of "que sera sera", whatever has happened has already happened, I cannot change it, I have held my dignity since break-up (as least as far as the ex knows!) and I cannot do anything more but enjoy every day and look to the future.

 

I embraced it and slept an entire night through, no waking up in the middle of the night which after over 3 months of horrible broken sleep is brilliant. I can't say I feel completely calm again right now, but it was a wonderful feeling and one I'm looking forward to experiencing a lot more now

[businessman]

Broke NC on Day 5 I found out today that I'm moving to Australia in January, and I really wanted to tell him. I called him and told him, and he was happy for me, but he tried his hardest to get off the phone within 1 minute....

I truly don't even recognize him anymore... I don't feel like I'm talking to him, just to some stranger.

 

I guess we're back to day 1.

 

The second I talk to him, I get so much anxiety, it's crazzzzy! I don't like this feeling, and I really just need to cut it all off with him. It really will be better for the both of us.

[AnnaN]

Day 9

 

I saw my signature and I realized I broke NC on 11/4 and 11/14 (this was his birthday), I don't need to add 11/24...

[The walkingman]

Going to break NC tomorrow, after looking over her facebook wall and looking at quotes (she puts up the occasional quote that is related to her thoughts on something and has put up 3 in the past week that I strongly believe deal with me). Hopefully she responds back this time after trying 3.5 weeks ago (2 weeks after bu) and getting no response. I wouldn't be surprised if she was planning on texting me this weekend but I think thanksgiving is a good excuse to give in.

[tujna]

Day 32 and Day 4

 

I feel OK, I have come to some realizations - things that it is not that I didn't know before but I can process them now in a more reasoned way. I kind of feel strong and ready to go on even though I feel hurt.

[northpickle]

Day 26

 

Woke up early (again!) and my mind turned to imagining him next to me, spooning behind me, kissing my neck as he used to do. I immediately felt sad but quickly got out of bed, made a coffee and here I am. I never think of any of my other exes that way and one day my mind will be free of him too.

[AnnaN]

Day 10,it may be a hard one

 

I dreamt of him last night. We were very ... intimate, I think I never had a dream of him all these years we were together.

Tonight I will go on a date, after more than 4 years. This guy has the same name, it was strange to see this name as caller ID and not be him.

I hope I won't be back home wanting to make a drunk call or texting after realizing that there is no one like my ex...

[HoliPoli]

Hi all and Happy Thanksgiving.

 

Not sure what day of NC this is.

 

Today I'm dropping off the face of the earth. I do not wish to tell him Happy Thanksgiving nor do I wish to receive one. A few days ago I ran accross a journal entry of mine where I logged a particularly bad fight in which he proceeded to say a bunch of REALLY horrible things to my face. I don't want to be friendly with an abuser. He should have tried to be a better person.

[carrie8484]

im ashamed im only at day 6

and weve been broken up nearly 6 months!

ive helped him, the dumper, move on by igiving in to his drips of crappy contact

 

no more

 

this time NC is for me.

[Reilly2856]

Day 21 NC

 

Never been this far before and it feels calming.

 

I've been getting some mssges from his end and even a call but I've been strong AND maintained NC.

 

It feels different this time...yeah, I miss him but I don't look forward to hearing from him because it reminds me that if I give into this temptation of speaking to him, I'll be stuck in that limbo again. Things didn't change in the past and I doubt they will change in the future. I regret not walking away sooner but no matter...I will walk away this time. I'm tired of looking back and hoping for him to be what he use to be.

[The walkingman]

I broke 24 days NC 4 hours ago..... no response yet so it is most likely I won't get one ): I just don't get it.....

[AnnaN]

Day 10,it may be a hard one

 

I dreamt of him last night. We were very ... intimate, I think I never had a dream of him all these years we were together.

Tonight I will go on a date, after more than 4 years. This guy has the same name, it was strange to see this name as caller ID and not be him.

I hope I won't be back home wanting to make a drunk call or texting after realizing that there is no one like my ex...

 

End of Day 10

I knew it would be difficult. I had written about my hopes... I was right. I got so sad after the date, it was ok during the date but when I got home I started thinking about our first date... I am not going to contact though, I need to be strong, I was strong all these days that I didn't want to make a contact...

[lonelyheart2]

So....I'm starting again here....! I know guilty but this time I PROMISE I won't break nc...at least not first anyway...so I believe I am now on Day 6.

[dobbin]

I broke up with my ex almost a month ago. been in low contact to sort out issues since we lived together. i've seen him twice including last night, which i hope will be the last time i see him since i will be moving out in a week's time and he will be out of the country for work for several weeks.

i see this as Day 1. it's been a very hard day. i shed a few tears but i cannot wait until i move all my stuff out, that way i can make a clean break and focus only on bettering myself and healing from my pain. i passed this day by leaning on friends for support. i have no plans to see him for anything anymore once my things are moved out. i will mail him his keys.

[Swift]

I'm fine, thank you. Taking up a new hobby. Finding a job is more important then relationship problems at the moment, far more concerned about that. How are you doing on day 3?

 

Not bad thanks.

 

Feel a certain sense of liberation but emptiness as well. I'm sure it'll pass.