Is it racist to exclude people based on race?

[Clarity]

Trying to summarize this thread:

 

"I am generally not attracted to men/women, but there have been/could be exceptions"

 

-> IMHO, not racist, just personal preference.

 

"I am not attracted to men/women and never will be."

 

-> IMHO, this is racist, you are prejudging whether you will be attracted to people you have never met, solely based on their race.

 

"I would never date a man/woman."

 

-> Obviously racist, especially since it's open-ended as to whether it's even based on looks.

[Batya33]

Trying to summarize this thread:

 

"I am generally not attracted to men/women, but there have been/could be exceptions"

 

-> IMHO, not racist, just personal preference.

 

"I am not attracted to men/women and never will be."

 

-> IMHO, this is racist, you are prejudging whether you will be attracted to people you have never met, solely based on their race.

 

"I would never date a man/woman."

 

-> Obviously racist, especially since it's open-ended as to whether it's even based on looks.

 

As for the third I would never date someone who was not of my religion no matter what race they were because I follow that part of my religion that prohibits interfaith marriage and I only date people who I potentially could marry. That doesn't make me racist or prejudiced.

[Daddy Bear]

If someone is prejudiced against a group based solely on their race it of course IS racism. More to the point, it's a racist preference.

 

Does this mean that the poster that posted that is a Klan member? No it doesn't necessarily but it does mean that when it comes to dating he is racist.

 

Dating preferences do not automatically indicate prejudice. One person may not be attracted to people with pale skin. Another may wish to have a fair-haired baby. A third may feel a duty to preserve his or her cultural or religious heritage. All of these people could, at the same time, view others of all backgrounds as equal to themselves.

[Superfreak]

Dating preferences do not automatically indicate prejudice. One person may not be attracted to people with pale skin. Another may wish to have a fair-haired baby. A third may feel a duty to preserve his or her cultural or religious heritage. All of these people could, at the same time, view others of all backgrounds as equal to themselves.

 

Simply not true. What you're misssing is that implicitly their are degrees of racism, and when you exclude someone on the basis of race (i.e I don't want to date a white person because I don't like pale skin) it's by definition racism. It might be a lesser degree of racism then someone that says "I will never have any white friends" or "I would never work for a black manager", but it is still a racist statement.

[selkie]

I know several people who have said they would not date someone of a certain race. One of my girlfriends has said she would never date an Asian guy. Another guy friend of mine said that he would never date a black girl. I'm sure most of you know someone who has said something along these lines.

 

My question is, is this just a simple preference, or does it go deeper than that? Would you actually consider this to be (a form of) racism?

 

 

I have a specific type that I always go for. I don't like Blond guys. I dont like Red haired guys. Or Pale ones.

Only guys that are brown, dark brown or black haired with hazel or green eyes and light olive skin or tanned skin.

I notice some mixed guys have these qualities and thats cool.

We like what we like and looks is huge part of the initial equation for most people.

[ghost69]

in no way does this make you racist. unless you solely express hate for a particular type of race. then you are racist. just saying you aren't attracted is nothing.

 

preference is much different than a belief.

[Clarity]

As for the third I would never date someone who was not of my religion no matter what race they were because I follow that part of my religion that prohibits interfaith marriage and I only date people who I potentially could marry. That doesn't make me racist or prejudiced.

 

Of course it's not racist, because you're excluding based on religion, not race.

 

Whether it's prejudiced is debatable, but that would be getting into semantics, I'm afraid. When someone's faith demands certain things of them, it's not a personal decision, but something "higher", so I wouldn't view it as a personal prejudice.

[Iceman26]

I think there is a difference between preference and racism. As the saying goes the heart wants what the heart wants.

[Altruist]

To say that 'I find all black women unattractive' sounds blatantly racist to me.

It just shows the person has deep-seated racist predudices about black women and black people in general. If it was a particular black woman I'd understand but all. Pfft.

[Batya33]

Is it discriminatory against overweight women for a man to say that he finds all overweight women unattractive?

[Daddy Bear]

Simply not true. What you're misssing is that implicitly their are degrees of racism, and when you exclude someone on the basis of race (i.e I don't want to date a white person because I don't like pale skin) it's by definition racism.

Poppycock. A black man who is turned off by pale skin should be no more labeled a racist than a white man who is turned off by pale skin. In fact, f you look in the three examples in my previous post, you'll see that I made no mention of their respective races. That was an erroneous assumption on your part, based on your own reactionary bias.

[Brooke657]

There are no degrees of racism...racism is racism...a black man being racist towards a black woman is still racism. Not wanting to associate with a certain race regardless of your race is still racism in my mind.

[ghost69]

There are no degrees of racism...racism is racism...a black man being racist towards a black woman is still racism. Not wanting to associate with a certain race regardless of your race is still racism in my mind.

 

i don't think the OP was asking about not associating with a specific race. i think they are referring to being attracted to a particular race or not specifically.

 

this all has to do with preference. if it is a personal belief that you don't want to date someone because you dislike the race altogether, then yeah, i can see that as racist. but that is a type of hatred and not preference.

 

if it is racist, then everybody is racist. everyone has their own preference who they find attractive. i have black women friends, but i'm really not attracted to black women. does that make me racist? nope.

[Altruist]

Excluding an entire race goes down as racist IMO.

[tmp0620]

Being naturally attracted to dark skin more than light isn't any more racist than being attracted to blonde hair and not black.

 

I have a feeling a lot of people say something that sounds absolute "I'm not attracted to black people", but would find that there are a lot of black people they are attracted to, for example. There was a thread about girls being attracted to tall guys. It's the same thing. Many of the girls that responded to the thread said they do prefer tall guys but end up dating guys that are shorter than they are.

[Yates33]

If you just really aren't attracted to a certain race, that is not your fault. Thats not racist.

 

Now if you find yourself attracted to a race, and won't date them because of the race, THAT'S RACIST.

[Daddy Bear]

Racism is not about whom you find attractive, it's about why. Most people who have certain ideals that they wish to pursue in a dating partner have the utmost human respect for people of all ethnic categories. End of story.

[Yates33]

Racism is not about whom you find attractive, it's about why. Most people who have certain ideals that they wish to pursue in a dating partner have the utmost human respect for people of all ethnic categories. End of story.

 

You can't help who you are attracted to.

 

I am not attracted to most white women or black women, I am attracted to some and if I find one I am attracted to I will date. So am I racist? Its only racist if you find someone from a difference race attractive but wont date them because of the race.

 

You cant blame or force someone for finding someone not attractive.

[kmartin85]

i would consider it to be a form of racism, but at the same time what about people that only date blondes, or people that only date tall people and so forth..that would be sort of like racism then too wouldnt it?

[Yates33]

i would consider it to be a form of racism, but at the same time what about people that only date blondes, or people that only date tall people and so forth..that would be sort of like racism then too wouldnt it?

 

Again, how is it racist to NOT FEEL ATTRACCTION towards someone of a different race?????

 

I think the confusion lies in the difference:

 

Not liking someone because of their RACE is WRONG.

 

Not liking someone because you are not ATTRACTED to them physically, isnt your fault!!!!!!

[tmp0620]

Again, how is it racist to NOT FEEL ATTRACCTION towards someone of a different race?????

 

I think the confusion lies in the difference:

 

Not liking someone because of their RACE is WRONG.

 

Not liking someone because you are not ATTRACTED to them physically, isnt your fault!!!!!!

 

You're right... at the same time I don't think that EVER happens... people might say they're never attracted to this race or that race or tall people or short people or whatever, but there seem to always be lots of acceptions.

[GrandGuy8682]

Just wanna say something....

Sorry if this is rude...

But girls who are into sex and say they wont date a balck man...

Black men TEND to have larger U'know's

 

thank you for assuming that women only want to date well endowed men. Even women who love sex don't necessarily just want a big one. And thank you for stereotyping that all black men are that way. I am sure there are black men out there who can't dance and have a small penis. Shocking huh?

 

I totally agree. In fact there are women out there who are very sexual who actually prefer guys who are somewhat smaller than average - my ex girlfriend for example. One of the main reasons she broke up with me was because I didn't meet her size requirements (or should I say over-exceeded them) :sad: And I only consider myself to be average. My best friend's cousin also ran into the same problem - his girlfriend left him because he was too 'big' for her. I'm caucasian by the way, and so is he...

[Yates33]

I totally agree. In fact there are women out there who are very sexual who actually prefer guys who are somewhat smaller than average - my ex girlfriend for example. One of the main reasons she broke up with me was because I didn't meet her size requirements (or should I say over-exceeded them) And I only consider myself to be average. My best friend's cousin also ran into the same problem - his girlfriend left him because he was too 'big' for her. I'm caucasian by the way, and so is he...

 

You guys must of had a really short and shallow relationship, no offense. Thats crazy, never heard of a woman leaving her boyfriend because of that, small or big.....

[GrandGuy8682]

You guys must of had a really short and shallow relationship, no offense. Thats crazy, never heard of a woman leaving her boyfriend because of that, small or big.....

 

Yeah tell me about it.... No offense taken at all. And it was short, 4 months. But she isn't just my ex, she was my first and only girlfriend, and you never forget your first. I just hope that doesn't happen to me again.

[Aueft]

If you have no preference in your friendship relationships with people of a certain race, but simply don't find people of that race sexually attractive-- it's not racism.

 

A few of my friends are black, but I don't find black girls attractive.