jada

Hi there, well I can tell you right now it sounds like shes got someone else. She sounds like a real bitch, but I dont know the whole story. If she really cared about you she wouldnt mind you calling her up. Sounds like shes just sick of you - Remedy - just leave it, stop fussing over her, thats whats making her sick of you, make her want you again. And most importantly, stop chasing her. It will work..

So what do you do when he goes out? How do you get over that anxious feeling? and what time does he usually get home? do you fight with him before he goes? When I fight with him I dont tell him not to go, I just fight with him calling him an alcoholic etc... bad aye..... Do you trust your man? Im glad theres someone else out there like me, cool....

Hi there, I feel like Im an insecure idiot. I always get upset when my b/f wants to go out by himself with his mates. Im 27 & hes 28.. we have a baby together. He doesnt go out much, but he gets the urge once every 2 mths. When he asks I get really upset, we end up in a big argument and then he just leaves and goes out drinking with his friends. He usually gets home at about 3 - 4am, but once when I was pregnant he didnt get home till 9am in the morning!!! We had a big fight over that. Should that 9am in the morn thingee be a reason for me to not allow him out again?? I know that sounds stupid. My mates have told me that I should just let him go out and I should go out and do my own thing. Ive tried that but I dont seem to have a good time when that happens, Id prefer to be with my b/f. Weve been going out now for 4 yrs. What am I to do, I guess I dont trust him. When hes out I always feel anxious and find that I cant sleep. My minds awake listening to cars coming up the road etc. Its a crazy feeling. I always think hes cheating.. not that Ive ever found any evidence. What am I to do???? HELP......Is there anyone else like me????

This sounds like to me that she falls for the wrong guys. She is obviously head over heels for this guy, there must be something about him that attracts him to her. She probably likes the bad boy image of a guy. I doubt that there will be anything between you 2, just friends - or else she would have made a move on you already. Just sounds like she wants you as a friend and nothing more. Its going to take time but she will see the light, however I doubt that you will be her next b/f. I would stop seeing her as a sexual object, just keep it friendly. As for the b/f - you can do nothing, it is up to her, some girls are attracted to guys that mistreat them, its kind of a turn on in a sick as way. You always want what you cant have right..

To everyone that replied to me. Thats really great. Thanks a bunch for those comments. Especially the last one. Really helps me to see things clearly and see how outsiders are seeing things. Its awesome. Thanx

Hi there, well Im in abit of a rut. I want to know if my b/f is still in love with his ex g/f. Weve been together for 4 yrs and so were they. We have a baby together, but does that really mean anything? She was really quite pretty and slim, a really intelligent girl but she would do anything he would say, he used to dominate her to the max, where as me - Im different, I dont put up with it and I let him know. The thing I doubt that they are seeing eachother but I sometimes wonder if he still has feelings for her. Its the first time Ive felt like this about my partners ex. I find myself feeling sick everytime I think about her. I am constantly looking for things that used to belong to her in my b/f's house as she used to live there before me. Ive asked him but he always says that hes forgotten about her? I dunno. Im always trying to find her and find things that belong to her. I dont know why Im even doing this, I think its cos I love him so much. How will I know if he still has feelings for her?

Yes, I feel I know what your feeling. My ex b/f did that to me. You feel as though if you have a baby to them they will chill, but no, things dont get better just worse. I left my partner while he was at wk, our baby was 4 mths old. He used to give me black eyes, hit me you name it, but I still lasted with him for 4 yrs. I loved the guy heaps. I even turned my back on my family to live in another town for him, he was a real dead beet. I literally came back to my hometown with my baby when she was a mth old and introduced her to my family. They didnt even know I was pregnant. So I finally (but definitely with help from family) found a house in secret and then moved every single thing out one day while he was at work. I was scared how angry he would be, but honestly his anger turned to feeling sorry and guilty and loneliness. He found out where I stayed, I ended up getting a trespass order on him and that was awesome. I finally met someone else after 1 year who I really clicked with and treated me well but sadly because of all the violence that had happened to me, I treated him badly and he left me. That gave me 3 years to sort my shit out and finally met someone else who treats me well and so I treat him well. My advice - it will happen, but I feel sad it took my beautiful late teen and early 20's years before I did anything about it. He wasted my life except for my daughter. Act now before you become an old, bitter woman with 10 kids and a hubby who bashes you and cheats on you. If they bash you, they definitely cheat as well as they have no respect for you as a woman or person. Leave now before age creeps up on you and youve wasted all those beautiful young years!!!

Yes, I know what it is. I must say that I can be like your husband sometimes. As I am the one who earns the most in the relationship, and am used to having money all the time I feel more in control to do whatever I like. I mean I feel that I am very generous with my money to my partner, I will buy him whatever he NEEDS but if he pisses me off I will cut the lifeline. When you have money you feel as though you are more powerful than the other. You can go out with your friends and buy yourself new clothes etc if you are feeling down about yourself, but the truth is - when I do this to him, I feel depressed and the spending of the money isnt as enjoyable. It feels hopeless unless you have someone that you love to spend it with. It feels as though you are making them feel good also, which gives you a good feeling. I feel like Im ontop of the world when I have all the money and I especially feel good when he pisses me off because I know he is dependent on me. Its a way to make them suffer, I know I sound selfish but I let my partner spend the rest of his wages on himself, as long as he pays the rent, I pay for pretty much everything else like food, power, ph etc and then if he doesnt piss me off I will try to save the rest or I will spend it on good times for the 2 of us. So yes, you definitely feel much more pwerful with money behind you as a backup....

Hi there, I neeeed to reply to this one. Sounds like your man likes to have his cake and eat it too, problem is his slice is HUGE! Girl, why are you allowing this guy to disrespect you. The only reason why guys do this is because they cant handle their alcohol. Its sad but true, my partner is kinda like that but not as bad. I would never accept him to openly flirt or even dance with anyone but me. Why do you even allow him to go out? Honestly with a man like yours who just leaves you alone while he goes and does his own thing is so sad and disrespectful. My partner gets friendly also to females when he drinks, also when hes sober hes friendly but when he drinks he gets more talkative, but never would I allow him to stare at the tits and asses. You need to find someone on the side thats going to make you feel good abvout yourself again and then you will be OK to leave him. Just find yourself a scapegoat first. It helps alot. Then lets see how big his ego will be.... ha ha ha

Hi there, Well my partner and I have always had a rocky relationship. Im 27 & hes 28. He is the bro of my ex b/f - weird aye, but thats the way life went. Weve just had a baby whose 4mths. Weve been together for 4 yrs now. Right from the beginning its been hard to trust him. I mean I remember when we werent even going out I would see4 him at parties and he would be getting with other girls when he had a g/f back then. Oh yes & one of those girls was me. Im not a hoe or anything, I just really liked him. He lied to me at first and said he had no g/f. Thats how it all started, when I finally found out he did I chucked him, and started going out with his bro. Anyway fastforward- hes ultra nice to females which really drives me nuts, I feel as though its not in a sexual way but have noticed that when he gets drunk he gets even friendlier, no touching or anything that Ive seen anyway. Its not that Ive seen anything, but I do know that he was still bonking his ex the first 2 mths that we started seeing eachother, not fully committed. Anyways, he never comes home late or anything and hardly ever goes out but when we argue he will just leave and go out drinking, this makes me paranoid that hes cheating. He always says hes just with his mates. He comes home and we always have a big argument. Can an ex-playa (self confessed) be changed into a faithful b/f. He says hes changed but how do you know? Thats my problem. He admits to cheating on his ex but then doesnt give much explanations. Mind you, I know that she used to be quite a hoe when she got drunk, maybe that was the thing. Pls tell me....