mellowchild

I don't know if it's just me or him. We've been together for a while... say a year. It's a long distance relationship by the way. But we do see each other on a regular basis. Back then, the way he would look at me and treat me, I used to feel really special. Now I feel like a shadow of a girl. What I mean exactly is I'm with a guy who compares me with other girls (or at least I feel that way). He talks (about and) to a lot of other girls too, which makes me feel like I'm not special enough for his attention. For example, he spends time and takes photos with other girls. He doesn't tell me sweet things anymore. Are my expectations too high? I don't know if this problem will continue to break me away from him. What do you guys suggest?

My current relationship right now is with my first love. Half way into the relationship I met this guy (call him John). John and I became good friends quickly. I knew he had feelings for me but I was involved in a wonderful relationship and kept things mutual. John has been waiting for me and passed many opprotunities to date other girls. Months have passed and John's always been there to support me whenever I had problems with my bf. Our friendship still remains platonic. Like all great things in the world... there will be a point where things end. The past couple months my relationship has been very rocky yet holding it's ground. My bf doesn't appreciate me anymore. John finally moved on and recently has a gf now. However, me and John we're still close friends... yet our feelings are getting stronger. (feelings are there) I have no intention of cheating or stealing John from his gf. I tried to break it off with my bf, but he held me back. I still love my bf, I just don't know what to do.

it's important for the guy and girl to communicate on this level of intimacy. NOT all girls like the guy in charge. I for one, agree with equality, but in this case the definition varies. I really like cuddling, the advantage cuddling has over sex is because it shows the guy cares for the girl and respects her. Guys who just want sex and leave is a super turn off. It's important for the guy and the girl to try and satisfy one another. Just because a girl is on top doesn't mean the guy's a wimp. She may just be a lil fun and aggressive. Not one partner should do all the work. If my boyfriend doesn't care about my happiness then "goodbye". If he does care it doesn't mean he's "pussywhipped" We do want a sensitive guy but it varies with each women's preference. good luck.

no one's really sure who "the one" will be until they've put they're whole heart into it. many people don't like taking this risk because it makes them vunerable. i suggest you date only one man at once. the reason is because right now you're comparing these two men to your standards. you're not sure because most likely there's no real chemistry going on. give yourself time to explore yourself and discover others. yes i do agree that even younger women (like myself) we like to have fun.. but deep inside we're looking for that special person. Even when they say that they're "not exactly looking for marriage" it doesn't mean they can't change their mind. Some men say that just so they won't scare women off or they're just not sure. Men are worried about getting hurt also thereforeeee they need that space. good luck.

Thanks, before I read that post, I didn't know what a "doormat" was. Yes, you're right about him wanting me to focus on myself. And there are a lot of signs that he's losing interest. (I give him a lot of attention) I've given your advice a lot of thought, and I think it's one of the best advices that I've received from anyone. Yes, I'm the type that tries to please everyone... and let people walk on me. Starting today I'll work on being the person (that I've put on hold) that i want to be. *sincerely much thanks

I know how it feels to miss someone and be depressed over them. A friend once told me that: "don't let relationships be the center of your life" and "you have bigger things to worry about like "friends/family/school" I agree this is true. Not that the significant other isn't important but he did remind me that "relationships don't last forever" so in the end you're left with friends/famiy/school to worry about. The only way to cure this is to put less into "love" and more into life. Make sure you appreciate friends/family/school as much as you can.

If the girl you share the "experience" with cares for you. There wouldn't be a difference if it was 10" or 3" *laughs well you get the idea. It's not important because the IMPORTANT part is WHO not WHAT.

Make sure you're playing the right game. For example can't mix basketballs in a football game. So first, FIND OUT for SURE if she's bi or not. And well after you find out you have two options: Bi: Ask her out Straight: Don't ask So just make sure you guys are on the same level.

I've been with my bf for a fairly long time. (let's just say a year) Everything has gone well except the past 3 months things have been sliding up and down. He's done a lot of things for me and we've been though so much. I forgot to add that it's a long distance relationship. But we do see eachother on a regular basis. I have to say I'm in love. Recently I've felt like he's been putting me down a lot but I've tried to be very understanding. Not to mention his wandering interest in other girls... (but I suppose that's normal) Out of no where he started to ignore me. I asked for a serious talk but he continued to ignore my request. I've been crying a lot lately and stressed to the bones. That's when I said "I'm breaking up with you." It hurts so much when you love someone but you're forced to let go. He called soon after and wanted to see me. When I saw him he acted as though nothing happened and was extremely nice to me. And explained that there was a misunderstanding. I took him back without so much of a hesitation. My friends think that I keep letting "this crap" slide by when I should do something about it. And some of my friends are worried that he's just using me. Love makes us blind, it's hard for me to judge.

in relationships... we always look back and say "i could have done this" or "if only.. that person did that" i guess the only thing i can tell you is... on your next relationship don't let the same mistakes happen. doesn't matter who's fault it is, a relationship takes two to make it work and takes two to break. (well sometimes) it must be hard for you to sleep. i'm in a relationship myself, it's hard work... and breaking up would be the last thing anyone wants. yeah of course you'll have to face her at school... but you know, keep a smile on your face. i'm sure she'll realize that she'll want you back. if not, it's ok .. just do your best and good luck in life hope you feel better.

what's wrong w/ me? i dream about bad things... that my boyfriend loves someone else. i feel like no one cares about me and every other girl out there is better looking than me. i have a boyfriend that loves me very much i don't know why i'm getting so protective. at one point i even asked myself if he's cheating on me...because he's been extra nice. and if he isn't giving me as much attention i wonder if he's looking at another girl. but there's no reason i should doubt him at all... i hate myself, even typing this sounds crazy but i can't control what i'm thinking. i'm so depressed and almost into tears thinking about the person i've become. no one knows i'm in this state... i can't talk to anyone.