Aleadragonhawk

There's a site that I'd like to point you towards - link removed. They have a lot of information on sex, birthcontrol, etc, that's directed specifically for teens.

Threats and blackmail probably aren't a good idea, and threatening to reveal his addicition might result in him becoming violent. I think you're just going to have to accept that he has the tapes of you two en flagrante delicto. If nothing else it's a good lesson for the future. Altogether this guy sounds pretty sleazy, I'd try to just keep him out of my life. Don't let him hold the tapes over you.

Have you tried flat-out telling him that "I don't want to meet her because..."? Sometimes, people just have to be shown the reason behind why you're feeling the way you are - though he really should be able to infer it from this situation. What worries me is that he seems to be forcing you into a situation that you don't want and that you aren't comfortable with, and that is NOT okay. You _have_ to be able to say no in a relationship, and your partner _has_ to be able to accept that. Otherwise, it isn't a healthy relationship. And if your partner isn't accepting your right to refuse, then maybe it's time to leave.

Hmm, Batya, I don't know if I'd feel the same about someone not being willing to meet unless you chatted on webcam first - guys can get into bad situations as easily as girls can, and it's always smart to verify as best you can that the person you're going to be meeting up with is real. Things like pictures of photo id (ie, drivers license) can help out too. I guess I'm just saying that guys have a right to be conscious about their safety too!

Mannerisms on webcams are different from those in person. You can feel very self-conscious while on webcam - the best thing I found for acting natural was closing the small window that let me see what I was showing on my webcam. It became more natural when I wasn't able to watch myself. The difference between in person is very startling. You don't really catch any of the physical mannerisms, and you only get a slight feel for facial expressions. It's better than nothing, though, and I'd always recommend that anyone in a cyber relationship utilize voice chat and webcams. It's a good way to verify who you're talking to, if nothing else.

As far as your girlfriend being wet enough for sex, even if she is aroused, some women just don't produce much natural lubrication. I'd suggest looking into lubricants. Astroglide is considered a good brand, and silicone based lubricants are pretty good too.

The method you're using with condoms right now is ineffective, as there are pregnancy risks from pre-ejaculate - especially if you've ejaculated earlier that day. Mythical's right about the STD risks too. If you haven't already, I suggest that you and your partner get a full battery of STD tests just to make certain that you're both clean. Remember that STD's can come through oral sex as well as vaginal/anal, so don't assume that just because your partner was a virgin that they can't have an STD. As far as lube goes, sorry Mythical, but the warming lube you're using is a bad idea. To produce the warming sensation, they use accacia honey - and letting any sugar into the vagina is a very good way to develop a yeast infection. Better to stick to something that doesn't have a chance of getting you sick. Most people recommend Astroglide as a good brand - I'm glycerin intolerant, so my partner and I use silicone based lubricants. And Shep88ner? Wet or not, using lubricant is an important part of condom safety, and it does tend to make intercourse more pleasurable for both parties involved.

Nnjlon, there's something I'm picking up on in your posts that no one here has mentioned yet. It sounds like you really don't want to be giving your boyfriend oral sex. If that's rooted in not recieving pleasure in return, or his selfishness, that's part of the issue - but if you don't want to be having a sex act? Don't. It doesn't matter if you've been in a relationship for a long time, and are usually sexually active -- if you don't want to be doing it, you shouldn't be doing it. His cavelier attitude in telling you to "take one for the team" shows a lot of disrespect to you and your feeling about this matter. Rather than playing games by witholding oral sex or tempting him with other sexual games, why not tell him, flat out, that you aren't enjoying performing oral sex on him? And remember, also, that you shouldn't be performing oral sex on him so that you can get it in return. Do it because you want to - no other reason really cuts it.

The effectiveness of Plan B does depend a lot on when you take it. It's been proven to be effective up to five days after unprotected sex, though the package information recommends use for only up to three days after. It will work better the sooner you take it, and if taken within 24 hours, the rate of effectiveness is 90+%. As far as rates of pregnancy from unprotected sex, the FDA places it at 85%. Your girlfriend stressing out can result in delaying her period, and the hormones in the plan B can make things weird, so just be sure to take a pregnancy test 10-14 days after you had the risk to calm both of your minds. It might be easier on you than waiting for her period, especially when there are so many factors outside of her normal irregularity that can postpone it. Oh, a quick edit. Part of your problem with condom breakage might be because you aren't using a lubricant, or because the lubricant you are using may not be condom compatible. Also make sure that you don't store condoms in hot/cold places (keeping one in your wallet is a BAD idea). Make sure to check expiration dates, and consider switching to a different brand of condom. You can look on the 'net and find a study consumer report did that'll show you which condoms tested as most effective.