alonegirl

Well today it has been 4 weeks since my ex-boyfriend of 4 years decided to end things with me. He told me that he was no longer in love with me but that he loved me yet two days before we broke up he told me how much he loved me and wanted to be with me. Turns out the real truth is he had met someone else and he is now with her. I have not heard from him since the day we broke up and I have not called him either, I guess I shouldn't expect to hear from him but then there is the part of me that wants him to call me, I just feel that he doesn't care and right now he probably doesn't because he is in this new relationship. I think I am having such a hard time with this because of all of his actions right before the break up, telling me how much he loved me, kissing me, being affectionate. He hated his job everyday he was miserable and depressed about going to work, everytime I would talk to him during the day he sounded awful and I would ask him what's wrong and his response was always I just need a new job I hate this job. I read somewhere that a lot of times when one partner feels as though they are not in love with their partner anymore it is usually because they are lacking self love and they look to their partner to make them happy. It also said that if the partner is unhappy or unfulfilled in any aspect of their live they look to their partner to treat them the way they did at the beginning and the partner usually doesn't which is why they look elsewhere. Maybe that is just wishful thinking, but I was there during our relationship and he seemed to be in love with me. I am just having really hard day and needed to get some of this out. Evenworse our anniversary is next saturday and we had all these plans of what we were going to do, that is going to be such a hard day.

I am just doing a little survey. I am wondering about breakups where the one partner breaks up with the other partner because they have met someone new. I am wondering did these second relationships work? Did your ex ever want to get back with? How long until they called you again? I am just wondering any input people have would be good.

I hate this feeling that I am feeling right now. I so badly want to hear from my ex-boyfriend that it's killing me. I should be mad at him and never want to speak from him again but nope. It's been almost 4 weeks since he broke up with me after 4 years of being together, I found out later that his real reason for breaking up with me was because he met some girl at his work that I guess he wants to be with. I have not heard from him since the day he broke up with me and I have not contacted him either. I read a lot of these posts and most people hear from their ex's, not me and for some reason I want to. How do you just walk away after 4 years and never look back? Is it because he has someone to distract him? How I wish that this new relationship doesn't work. I think one of the biggest reasons I want to hear from him is to know that he cares, does he not even care? I keep having these hopes of him calling me and us talking and I know that makes it worse. I have a really hard time dealing with this because up to two days before he broke up with me he was telling me how much he loved me and wanted to be with me. I am so confused and I am trying to answer all these questions that I may never have an answer to and that bothers me I want answers. I still have quite a bit of stuff left at our place so one day I will have to call him but I guess part of me keeps hoping he will make the first move. And right now because it hasn't been that long I probably would take him back as dumb as that sounds. 4 weeks is a long time to not hear from someone.

I can't stop thinking about my ex and wanting him to call. I have these fantasies of him calling me and us working things out. I should be mad at him I should never want to hear from him again. He broke up with me after 4 years because he had met someone else. I don't know how to get over this feeling. I want to hear from him so badly, I think because I would like to know that he cares. I would like to know if he is thinking about me. I don't understand how you walk away from someone after 4 years and never look back. We are going on 4 weeks of no contact and it is killing me. I want to call him so bad. Does he not even care? Was our 4 years nothing?

I wish I had the answer to this question these are the thoughts that run through my mind all the time. My ex-boyfriend of 4 years broke up with me three weeks ago right after we got back from vacation where he told me how much he loved me and all that. I found out 4 days later not from him that he had met another girl at work and was talking to her while we were together. He is now with her, she is probably practically living at our house and that thought makes me sick to my stomach. How does someone get over a relationship so quickly and move on with someone else. I also think that my ex doesn't love me and I don't understand that. I know I probably haven't been much help I just wanted you to know you are not alone right and if you find any way to make these thoughts go away let me know.

I am not doing well. I can't stop thinking about my ex. I try to be angry that he broke off our 4 years to be with somone else but I just can't. I am so hurt I feel it deep down in the pit of my stomach. It has been three weeks I haven't heard a word from him and I haven't called him. I keep hoping he will call me and tell me he misses me but nothing. That is so hard. I think I really just want the phone call to know that he didn't just forget about me, to know that maybe he thinks about me. But in realty I know he probably doesn't because he has her to distract him. He had totally moved on and it just kills me inside. How does someone just walk away and move on with their life without second thought. We had all these future plans, we lived together, did everything together and my whole life has been uprooted. I don't even have the energy to try and make myself feel better, to pick myself off the floor and move on. The fact that he allowed this person to come in between us just bothers the hell out of me, the fact that he did this period just hurts so bad. I just wish he could have been honest with me, if he wasn't happy he should of just told me that when he began feeling unhappy rather than wait around until someone came along and then break up with me. I just want him to realize what a mistake he has made and my fear is that he will never think that. I know I shouldn't concern myself with that but I do for some reason. I so badly want to call him and confront him with all this but it takes everything I have not to. I'm sure I wouldn't get the response I want anyways. I want the response of "I'm so sorry and I'm so stupid I love you and you are the best thing that ever happened to me" I know it's dumb to feel this way I should be angry.

Today was going ok having a pretty decent day. Was able to keep my mind of my ex for a little while (For those you never read my story ex of 4 years broke up with me three weeks ago blamed it on personal things with himself but turns out he had met someone else he wanted to be with) then I get the news that he is returning all my mail that comes to the house return to sender. I know this because the week we broke up we were on vacation so my work sent my paystub to the house, they just got it back today with return to sender. He knows where I am all he had to do was forward it to me, or drop it off at my work after I left. The agreement the day we broke up was that he was going to send it to me at my mom's house. Now he's doing this. This has just killed me and brought me back to square one. I don't even know the person that he is right now. Why does he have to be so cruel that he can't even text message me and tell me that I have mail or something. He is being such a d$*k right now and I don't understand it. I didn't think things were that bad between us, we have a dog together that I was supposed to continue to see but I guess that is not going to happen. My cat is still at the house he said he would watch until I get my own place I wonder what happened to her. I'm sure all the rest of my stuff that was there is now gone. I just don't understand. Part of me was still hoping that he might call me one day and apologize but I guess I can throw that out the window. Now even more do I want to call him and tell him off but I am sticking to no contact. This is just so hurtful.

I thought that the pain would be getting better by now, it has been almost three weeks. Still no contact at all. For anybody that didn't read my earlier post my ex boyfriend of 4 years broke up with me gave me some long story about him being unhappy in his life etc turns out he had met someone else at work that I guess he decided he wanted to be with. Everyone keeps telling me that I should be angry and I know that I should be angry and I get angry every once in a while but then it passes and I am back to hurt again. I am just in so much shock, I feel as though I am dreaming. Someone that loves you and that you love are not supposed to hurt you. Someone that you felt safe with, secure with who always told you as long as you were with him nothing would ever happen to you is not supposed to hurt you like this. I just dont understand why he did this and I know I may never but that is hard to deal with. I want to know if he even feels bad for doing this? For hurting me? I want to know how his life can just go on and he can act like he has no care in the world while I am just devastated. How does someone you thought loved you and cared about you just walk away and never look back? These are all the questions in my head that I know will probably get answered but I guess I really just needed to vent.

Here it is Friday moring I am starting my day at work and I should be so happy because the weekends here right? Wrong. I am getting so down because I know that the weekend is going to be so hard. I wrote in an earlier post about how my boyfriend of 4 years broke up with me and then I found out it was because he had met someone else. We have been apart now for a little over two weeks, no contact either and it is just killing me. I thought that I was doing a little better but I now realize I'm not. I am just dreading the weekend. I can't seem to stop thinking about what he's doing, what they're doing, are they doing all the things we would do on a weekend? I try not to think about it and I try to turn my mind elsewhere but I just can't seem to shut it off. This is awful. This pain is just unbearable. I know I should keep myself busy but that is hard too because my two closest friends have moved away and most of my friends are mutual friends so I don't really have that many people to hang out with, and even if I stay busy that still doesn't help me when I come home and lay in bed by myself. And part of me doesn't even want to stay busy part of me just wants to lay in bed and put the covers over my head, and a huge part of me just wants to go back to my old life, where weekends didn't suck and we were together. I just don't know what to do I hurt so bad and it hurts even more that he hasn't called me and he probably isn't going through this because he has her to take his mind off it. This is just awful.

When reading your posts it was like reading my own. I too am 23 and my ex-boyfriend of 4 years just broke up with me two weeks ago. Told me he didn't want to be in a relationship anymore, wanted to go out whenever, he also told me he was not in love with me but that he loved me. We had been living together for 3 1/2 years and also have a dog together. Turns out in my situation he had met someone else at his work that I guess he decided was more important than the 4 years we had together (he never told me about her I found out myself) I have not heard from him and I have not called him and it is the worse feeling ever. I too wonder why hasn't he called, it makes me feel like he doesn't even care. I can't sleep at night, I can't concentrate at work, I cry at the drop of a hat. I feel as though someone has a knive in my stomache and they just keep stabbing me with it. It is not stupid to think he will call you, sometimes I find myself staring at my phone hoping it will ring. Part of me doesn't want to move on but to keep feeling this way I don't think I can do it. He probably is feeling the same way as you are you were a part of each other's life for 6 years. I know you're next thought is if he feels the same why doesn't he call me. You will drive yourself crazy with these questions believe me I do it to my self all day long. I just realized I'm probably not really helping you but I just wanted you to know that you are not alone in what you are feeling right now.

Thank you for the help. This is so hard. I just feel as though my world has fallen down around me. To have no contact with him at all is what is hurting me the most. It just shows me he doesn't care and if he does he's not admitting to himself becuase he has someone else to occupy his time. And yes she did know about me which pisses me off even more. I don't understand girls that do this sort of thing do they not think it won't happen to them. I am driving myself crazy with wonder, I can't stop thinking about it, him and them together, and it's driving me crazy. I just don't know if I can deal with this pain anymore. I just want it to go away. I want to lie in bed until it goes away. Even worse our anniversary is in like 2 weeks, that will probably be the hardest day ever, 1 month ago we were discussing plans and what we were going to do for it and now this. I just don't know what to do.

I know what you are going through. My boyfriend of 4 years broke up with me two weeks ago, told me he wasn't in love with me but that he loved me, that he didn't want to be in a relationship, wanted to be able to do whatever he wanted without having to answer to anyone. I too didn't understand how someone changes overnight, we had built a life together a life that he said he was happy with. Then all of a sudden boom he didn't want it anymore. Well turns out in my situation he had met someone else and that is why is mind changed but not saying that is the case with you. One thing people keep telling me is that I may never get the answers and that doesn't sit well with me, I want the answers I want to know what happened, why it happened and I haven't talked to him at all which hurts even more. It's awful to be so in love with a person and then something like this happens and you feel like you don't even know them. People keep telling me it will get better so I guess that will be my advise to you.

My boyfriend (well I guess ex) of 4 years just broke up with me two weeks ago. He told me that he didn't want to be in a relationship, that he wasn't happy with his life (job,me, etc) and that he wanted to be able to do whatever he wanted whenever he wanted without having to answer to anyone (he's 26). I found out about 4 days after we broke up that he had met someone else while we were still together (he didn't tell me I found out on my own) someone that he works with, that I guess he is now with. The hurt that I am feeling is unbearable. I had trust issues when we first got together (last boyfriend was a real jerk) and he totally brought me to a place in my life where I was in a trusting and loving relationship. I trusted him 150% and to find out that he was doing things behind my back and lying to me just crushes me. He always told me that he would never do what my ex had done to me, that I had nothing to worry about. I haven't heard from him at all, which is killing me even more. I still have some things there, he also said he would watch my cat till I got my own place, he also let me keep the key. I don't want to call him because he said he needed his space and I know if I call him he will be a total jerk to me and that would hurt even more. I just can't stop thinking about him being with someone else, her being in my house, in my bed, living my life, it makes me sick. There are a lot of things that I have stood by him through (nothing like cheating or anything just some trouble he got into) and for him to repay me this way after 4 years just sucks. I can't focus on anything, I can't stop thinking about him about our life and he is just out there living his life probably not even letting it bother him. I'm sure he doesn't cry, have a hard time working or sleeping because he has her in his life and it just makes me sick. Then I talk to mutual friends of ours and he is telling pepole that the breakup was mutual, be a man and tell people the truth. Now I keep blaming myself and wondering what if I would of done this differently maybe he wouldn't of looked elsewhere. Then it makes me question me, he used to tell me I was the most beautiful girl in the world and that he never wanted to be with anyone else, well I can't be that beautiful if you left me for someone else. I hate that he has done this, but at the same time I miss him so much. This sucks! I am really having a hard time with this any help anyone can provide would be greatly appreciated.