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altoids144

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  1. altoids144
    Actually things changed. apparently her boyfriend doesn't trust her anymore and they're trying to sort that out. So doesn't look like we can even be friends. It's a shame.
  2. altoids144
    I met this girl at a club and we really hit it off. We hooked up that night but later she told me she had a boyfriend. She wants to stay as friends but I have feelings for her and I'm not sure if I can withhold these feelings. What can I do? Should I just stop talking to her altogether?
  3. altoids144
    Same thing happened to me... we broke up just before graduating from college BUT we had the same friends. It was difficult as it was the last chance I would see everyone but at the same time I had to deal with the breakup. In the end, she backed away from friends and hung out with people she was less close with. This was because she dumped me and it was hard for me to be alone at that point. When summer came, I finally had the chance to hang out with friends and not worry about contact with her as she returned to her home. But when she came back after the summer, problems started arising. I became extremely uncomfortable being around her and it was my turn to avoid my friends this time. I actually ended up leaving the country .... I'm not saying necessarily you have to do this but everyone's situation is different and only you can make the decision. Think it through.
  4. altoids144
    yea i think it is jealousy... I don't understand women with all the attention seeking. But sometimes i'm really turned off by how she's changed because she's not the same person anymore. When I first saw it... it kinda disgusted me. I didn't think she looked better with all the make up... but I lied and told her she looked pretty coz girls like that... i know.
  5. altoids144
    I'm not sure why this exactly bothers me, maybe someone can tell me. But i've noticed how my ex dresses has changed. She's also constantly changing her hair style, she just cut it and she tells me she wants to change it again. Also I look at pics of her and she's puts a considerable amount of make up on. I feel like her personality has changed also and I don't know why this bothers me so much. Help me pls....
  6. altoids144
    I am going through the exact same thing. I broke up with my ex about 6 months ago after a 2.5 yr relationship. It was both our first relationship. ABout a month I have moved away and this hasn't really helped me. I still think about her and wonder whether she has a new boyfriend or not. I wonder what she's doing and really want to talk to her. I have deleted her off my MSN also but we sometimes e-mail each other. I'm worried that after a year I will still be in the same situation, unable to move on. I don't know what advice to give you because I'm going through the same thing but no contact definitely works for now. It might take time but it will eventually happen. You can't love a person forever without feeling love from the other person. It's a 2-way process... right now it's just one way. I am also thinking of travelling around, to get away from it all. I think it's good to be by yourself and to realize that you can love yourself and not rely on another person's love. That's just me though. I'm not sure if this helps.
  7. altoids144
    Similar thing is happening to me. I'm e-mailing my ex and although it's supposed to be just friendly, I feel like I am holding on, keeping hopes that we will get back together again. I know it's not good so i've decided to stop replying to her. It's really up to you.
  8. altoids144
    After I read this post... i tried to check my ex's e-mail since I know she uses this one password for everything. It worked.. and i feel really bad now. It's totally wrong but it's so tempting. I just wanted to see if it worked... but then i ended up looking at who she's been sending e-mails to. Not good....
  9. altoids144
    I felt the same way as you. For me it was my way of dealing with the break up. I would often make myself angry because it worked for me last time I got dumped. I did see a counselor and she told me that it's OK to be angry. So I went home and sent a bunch of angry messages to my ex. She exploded on me and I felt really bad about it. She wouldn't talk to me or anything and was really mad at me. I totally regret doing that. It took a while to heal but eventually after months we became friends. I still have feelings for her and care about her but I try to get angry at her to deal with these feelings. However, I never send the anger to her because that would just make both of us feel bad about the situation and makes it even worse. Although you may want to make her feel guilty, you have to understand that she's a human being too with feelings and she is trying to get over you also. Sometimes you gotta think about the other person too, even though they dumped you. You still felt love towards them and cared for them and this will never change. So in summary, be angry but don't show it. Talk to others and start a journal so you can get it out.
  10. altoids144
    it's been about 3-4 months of NC
  11. altoids144
    It's been about 6 months since my ex broke up with me and I have had a good amount of time without contact with her. Recently I have been avoiding her and her friends. I will be leaving the country and I set up a meeting for lunch before I leave. I don't know when I will see her again and I just wanted to have the opportunity to see her one last time. I want to talk about our relationship and if we want to be friends but i'm not sure if this will be a good idea. I'm not really sure what I want to achieve and was wondering if anyone had similar experiences to relate to. I would really appreciate your feedback.
  12. altoids144
    I have broken up with my ex-girlfriend for about 6 months now and she broke up with me. I'm still not totally over her but I have been dating others and on the path of recovery. I will be leaving the country and I don't know when I will be returning so I asked if she wanted to have dinner. I haven't seen her for 2 weeks and the last time I saw her I totally avoided her. I made the step in asking for a dinner date to catch up and wrap things up before I leave. Is it a good idea to do this? Or should I continue with the no contact strategy I have been doing? Thanks.
  13. altoids144
    I can relate to your situation. I had been out with my ex for over 2 years and felt that it was true love. She was my first serious girlfriend and I was in love with her. It has been 3 months since i've had contact with her. Sometimes we would talk over AIM but only once or twice over the period. But today I saw her since I was meeting up with mutual friends. I wish I hadn't gone, I kept looking at her and saying to myself how beautiful she was. It kind of set me back a little and now I know i shouldn't see her anymore until i'm totally healed. It's a difficult time but I should be able to get through it. No contact is definitely the way to go. .. difficult though.
  14. altoids144
    I keep having the urge to talk to her ... not by phone but through instant messaging. I know it's bad but I just want to talk to her and see how she is doing. What can I do about this? Is it really gonna hurt me that much?? I'm not sure if i want to be friends with her.. or these are lingering feelings.
  15. altoids144
    The mutual friends are closer to her. Since college finished, a lot of my friends have left which doesn't leave many to do things with. I'm feeling kind of lonely and I think this has contributed to the feelings coming back. I definitely think that she has no feelings for me. She wanted to move on when we broke up and since I was her first and she is still young, she wanted to explore more. She did mention the possibility of coming back in the future, but not in the near future. I think the best I can do is just keep my contact with her and her friends to a minimum. It's a difficult balance but i think I can achieve it. Thanks for the advice.
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