Del

Give me an average looking woman, with a great smile, great personality, good sense of humour, over a Jordan (an airhead model in the U.K.) any day. Big boobs don't mean nothing!

In my opinion, giving oral sex to a woman is just simply, The greatest Feeling In The World. Nothing comes close. When I get carried away, I just simply want to DEVOUR her.

I was the same, absolutely terrified by motor vehicles. I used to say to myself that I would never drive. Now, I am 39 years old and I drive a car like it is second nature. Trust me, if I can do it anybody can. Darrell

I never had a girlfriend until I was 23, and yes people would insinuate I was gay. I was very shy until I was maybe 22 or 23, what I did was this. i used to go running a lot and went to the gym a lot. This makes you feel good within yourself. I bought myself some decent clothes, and this made me feel good when I went out etc. I was now more confident than I had ever been. Then I started to ask girls out, yes, I got knocked back a few times, I then started dating a girl who eventually became my wife. So, Sandbox, get your confidence built up, you are partly there as you can talk to women who you work with.

I separated from my wife in July '96. She left me for someone else and told me she didn't love me anymore. All the cliches I hear such as 'Time is a great healer' are true. It is only the passage of time that can truly heal someone (in my humble opinion). It is very hard getting through the initial months, infact I found it agony. I would say 4 to 5 months to get over the initial agony. But to truly get over someone depends how long you were with them. I was with the ex for 6 years and I can honestly say I never truly got over her until 2 to 2 and a half years, I don't mean I was in despair for that period, I just found I went certain days when I never thought about her, also when someone told me she was remarrying I truly didn't care. I excercised the NC after 6 months and I believe that was the key. But to anybody else going through a break up I really do sympathise, it is without a doubt a rotten period in anyones life, and I know it can DESTROY certain people. I found it really was a case of gritting ones teeth and just getting on with it. You have to keep yourself busy, I used to go to the gym a lot, started going out with mates etc. I hope this post might have helped someone. It is a long hard road, but you always get there in the end.

Thanks for the advice here. I realise I have been stupid. I have decided to go down the N.C. route. It is the only way. As of today I have ceased contact totally. Still think about her, but I know it is the right thing to do. Six months from now I will probably feel ashamed I posted something like this. P.S. What a great forum. Del.

Is this normal. Last year I started a new job, the happiest person in the world. I got to know a fellow colleague, a female. I wasn't attracted to her at all, but as time went on, I found I could talk to her, I still wasn't attracted to her. After Xmas, she told me I was a really funny person, and she had been looking forward to seeing me. I still wasn't attracted to her! At the end of our works course (in January) she seemed to get upset and asked me for a hug as we wouldn't see each other for 10 weeks, I gave her a hug, and my phone no. I still wasn't attracted to her. After 10 weeks, we saw each other again, she said something along the lines of 'you are the nicest colleague I have met'. I still wasn't attracted to her! but I did like to talk to her. So here I am now, in July, I have met up with her on a course in June, we all went out together in June on a works do. I have now realised this woman is an absolute Gem. She has been split from her boyfriend since March, I have found the woman I was not attracted to at all, has become the biggest crush in my life EVER. I am constantly thinking about her daily, we were talking on the phone last week, and she said I sounded down, so I told her why, I was attracted to her. she sent me a message back saying we would always be friends etc, I have since met her and we have talked. The problem is I have a partner and 6 year old son. I feel I am going thru a mid life crisis, but I just cannot get this woman who meant NOTHING to me last year out of my head. It has got to the point where it is destroying my life, is this normal. I am convinced this woman feels the same but will not reveal it as I am attached. P.S., it would take a lot for me to walk out on my partner, as I love her. Is this normal. Advice please.

Hi Mate, Of course it is normal to get these feelings. It might take you another year or 2 to totally get over it. Time is on your side now mate, you are over the worst, believe me.

Hey, I know exactly how you feel. Do not do anything stupid. I have been in exactly the same Pos. It takes time, and a lot of time. Get thru the initial stages and I guarantee you will feel better. You need people to help you thru this, and you WILL get thru this.