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Thread: Pages he likes on Facebook

  1. #31
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    I think you were right to look at his Facebook. I do when a woman in one of my parenting groups wants to friend me - specifically I look for whether she's involved in an MLM, whether she posts a lot of political rants (no matter what her leanings are) etc -I don't drill down that far but sure I give it a look.

  2. #32
    Platinum Member boltnrun's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Batya33
    I think you were right to look at his Facebook. I do when a woman in one of my parenting groups wants to friend me - specifically I look for whether she's involved in an MLM, whether she posts a lot of political rants (no matter what her leanings are) etc -I don't drill down that far but sure I give it a look.
    Employers do the same thing. I know people think they don't but they absolutely do.

    That's why I cringe when I see the pushed up cleavage selfies one of my employees constantly posts. She is up for a promotion and doesn't seem to think her boob shots might affect how she's viewed or that posting those photos could even remove her from consideration.

    OP, you can date or not date whomever you choose, as you've stated. And it can be for any reason or no reason at all. Totally your choice.

  3. #33
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    I think you were right to look at his Facebook. I do when a woman in one of my parenting groups wants to friend me - specifically I look for whether she's involved in an MLM, whether she posts a lot of political rants (no matter what her leanings are) etc -I don't drill down that far but sure I give it a look.
    Same.

    I had a woman friend who seemed like the nicest woman. But on her facebook she was a huge Trump supporter. She sounded very racist and hateful.

    That was the end of our friendship.

    You can learn a lot about people via social media.

  4. #34

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    Originally Posted by boltnrun
    My ex was immature and juvenile enough to hang pics of topless, large breasted women on the walls and ceiling of his bedroom like he was living in a frat house. I mean, every inch of wall and ceiling was covered and most of the pics were poster-sized.

    One would conclude that he was attracted to large breasted women, right? Except, no. I mean, mine aren't tiny but not huge either and yet he cheated on me with and then dumped me for a young woman who is maaayyyybe a 30AA. No visible breasts at all.

    Turns out he was overcompensating because he's actually closeted and the new (still current) girlfriend is willing to switch roles with him and, um, "do" him anally. And I was unfortunate enough to be told this wonderful bit of information by his sister. Super bad visuals.

    OP, he's overcompensating IMO. For what, who knows. But if you don't like it and you're only two dates in, why not just stop dating him? Who cares if he agrees or disagrees, YOU decide who you date, not anyone else.

    Wow, sorry you went through that.. You definitely don't deserve a guy like him.
    I was just thinking to discuss this with him and explain the reason why I want to stop dating. I hate it when people just ghost you. I wouldn't like to do that

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  6. #35
    Platinum Member boltnrun's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Anastasia253
    Wow, sorry you went through that.. You definitely don't deserve a guy like him.
    I was just thinking to discuss this with him and explain the reason why I want to stop dating. I hate it when people just ghost you. I wouldn't like to do that
    You don't have to ghost, but why meet with him? Don't you think that meeting would be awkward and uncomfortable?

    Would you want a guy to ask to meet with you for the sole purpose of telling you he doesn't want to see you anymore?

    How about a phone call?

  7. #36
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    Originally Posted by Anastasia253
    Wow, sorry you went through that.. You definitely don't deserve a guy like him.
    I was just thinking to discuss this with him and explain the reason why I want to stop dating. I hate it when people just ghost you. I wouldn't like to do that
    It's two dates -it's not ghosting at all. Please don't put him to the trouble of meeting you - I agree with boltnrun. If he asks you out for another date then respond with "thanks so much and I don't think we have enough in common for it to make sense to see each other again." If he doesn't ask you out again I think it's fine to give short responses to any texts he might send that signal that you are not interested in interacting.

  8. #37
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    Here's my take fwiw.

    I'd have no issue with him liking large breasts, many men like looking at large breasted women nothing new about that; as j.man said it's no different from men looking at playboy or other such mags years back.

    What would be the dealbreaker for me is his need to broadcast it on FB where he knows you'd see it, a woman he is hoping to impress, and worse sending you crass photos/texts claiming it was a "joke" under the guise of a Disney cartoon.

    Low class bottom of the barrel behaviour as far as I am concerned, no thank you, next!

    To me, him doing that (especially him sending you that "Disney princess" photo and writing what he did) suggests he has zero respect for you.

    Men who respect you would never send something so crude OP, for me, that is the red flag, and dealbreaker.

    Also, may I ask why you have only had two dates since May?

    He sounds gross imo, I'd be totally turned off, why aren't you?

    After seeing that photo he sent, along with what it said, and after only having two dates in three months, I would have just blocked him, and I find it curious you described it as "humorous," what are you his "frat buddy?"

    Cause that is something a man would send a frat buddy, not a woman he just started dating and hoping to impress.

    Ick.
    Last edited by katrina1980; 08-25-2019 at 08:29 PM.

  9. #38

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    Originally Posted by boltnrun
    You don't have to ghost, but why meet with him? Don't you think that meeting would be awkward and uncomfortable?

    Would you want a guy to ask to meet with you for the sole purpose of telling you he doesn't want to see you anymore?

    How about a phone call?

    Well, I tried to have this conversation by text but he insisted that we speak face to face..

  10. #39
    Platinum Member boltnrun's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Anastasia253
    Well, I tried to have this conversation by text but he insisted that we speak face to face..
    Not text! A phone call.

    So what if he "insists"!! You have free will and the right to say "no" to an in person meeting.

    Do you struggle with asserting yourself or your boundaries?

  11. #40
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    Originally Posted by boltnrun
    Not text! A phone call.
    Yes a phone call. I could not agree more. I did that when I "ended" something after two dates even though we typically e-mailed (no texting, no cell back then). I felt better about myself calling him and showing him I cared enough not to just do a one-sided email. He appreciated it (although the next day sent me 6 emails in a row, each increasingly angry, sigh)

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