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  • Steven Robinson
    Steven Robinson

    The Healable Heartache of Failed Relationships

    Failed relationships are a heartbreaking truth of life. When two people love each other but things don't work out, it can feel like everything is lost and there's no way to make it right again. Yet, while the heartache can be deep and devastating, it doesn't always have to be permanent- there are ways to work through and eventually heal even the most painful of relationship breakups.

    When someone you care deeply about is no longer a part of your life, trying to reach them can feel like an impossible goal. Yet just as every situation has its complexities, understanding the complexities of the wounded heart can provide new pathways that haven't yet been explored. Depending on the details of the breakup, it can often take some initiatory action or strategic planning to bridge the gap between two people that were once close.

    The first step in healing from a broken relationship is to take a step back from the emotional intensity of the experience and allow yourself to process your thoughts. It can feel easier said than done, especially if the breakup has been sudden or unexpected; but taking even a few moments of peace to check in with yourself can be vital to finding some inner clarity.

    Company can be comforting in times of distress, so reach out to friends and family who will be understanding and supportive. Work might also help keep your spirits up- by immersing yourself in something to focus on, you'll be able to heal more quickly. Exercising or engaging in a hobby that makes you happy can be another great way to distract yourself.

    If you're ever feeling overwhelmed, know that time is a great healer. Sometimes the most effective remedy to the pain of a failed relationship is patience. As difficult as it may be, start to practice body scanning and noticing where the uncomfortable physical sensations related to anxiety and sadness will manifest in your body- this can offer a window of understanding into your feelings and help you to process them.

    It can help in times of deep heartache to find something to ground yourself in at all times, to remind yourself that life does go on. Whether it be a painting, a song or even a physical object, having something to find comfort in during low moments is essential. Reflection and self-care post-breakup can be a powerful combination, healing not only the hurt but also propelling you forward in life.

    Try to access the little joys in life and recognize that there can be beauty and value in times of sadness. When you become comfortable with being in the moment, then, and only then, will you be ready to move forward. This could mean reaching out to the person you still have strong feelings for- it can be nerve-wracking, but when done in the right way with a clear intention, it can make all the difference. But don't be disheartened if it doesn't work out- the key is to remember that communication and kindness are always more powerful than silence.

    Breakups are difficult and it's natural to feel grief and even guilt- however, solutions do exist. Keeping forgiveness and self-compassion at the top of the list during healing can bring lasting solace. By following these steps, anyone can eventually get beyond a failed relationship so that they can develop inner strength and fulfilment in their lives.

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