Need some words of advice

[Ana CR]

I (30F) was in an on and off relationship for two years, we are both doctors, it was a long distance relationship because of my residency, I had some suspicions of home cheating on me (eg fingind an empty condom box at his house after months of not seeing each other); last December he ghosted me for two days so I broke up with him via text, he later texted me back saying I was immature and refused to talk to me even though I tried reaching out several times, a month later he blocked me on everything, now he is fooling around with several women and I’m still hurting, it’s important to state that he’s 47 and all the women he hits on are on their twenties. I don’t know why I’m still so sad even though he’s made clear he’s moved on and he doesn’t want me, I wonder if he ever remembers me o will he ever miss me or acknowledge me as someone worthy.

[Wiseman2]

51 minutes ago, Ana CR said:

 December he ghosted me for two days so I broke up with him via text, he later texted me back saying I was immature and refused to talk to me even though I tried reaching out several times, a month later he blocked me on everything, now he is fooling around with several women and I’m still hurting,.

Sorry this happened. It sounds like you dodged a bullet if he runs around cheating and blocking you. Please don't wrap up your self worth in someone like this. 

[Batya33]

What were your feelings about the big age gap at the time? It sounds like a lot of drama and perhaps he liked the long distance aspect so he could keep his options open.  I'm sorry.

[yogacat]

He sounds like a 47-year-old immature man who has not been successful with women so he chooses women 20 years younger than him.

Are you sure that this is someone you would want to be with in the long-term? Do not fret about his actions and what he is doing, he is running away from being alone and is thinking like a 16 year old, not a 47 year old. Be grateful that you dodged this bullet.

[catfeeder]

10 hours ago, Ana CR said:

I wonder if he ever remembers me o will he ever miss me or acknowledge me as someone worthy.

What you describe is someone who isn't looking for 'worthy,' he just likes to get laid. Worthiness starts with the Self. You set your own value. If you're willing to indulge in scraps from a man who doesn't value women, then you're the one who's willing to devalue your Self.

If you want a relationship, don't mess with anyone who sets their own bar at 'casual'. That's the stuff to suss out before you even start dating someone. Ask whether a man is dating to find a committed relationship, and any answer less than a straight 'yes' to that question is too casual to date.

Most people are NOT a good match. This is true of everyone, it's natural odds. We each hold intrinsic value, but we won't know that or feel it if we base our self esteem only on recognition by others, because everyone has a selective lens in seeing and appreciating the value of others. So rejection only speaks of the limits of another's vision rather than of any deficiency in you.

Think of all the acquaintances you've made over a lifetime with perfectly worthy and appealing people. Yet there are only a few who you've synched with well enough to be considered a 'close' friend. Same is true of dating. So value your SELF enough to hold out for true simpatico with the RIGHT match for you--not someone who doesn't own the right lens to see your value.

Meanwhile, you are 'worthy' of more than this man offered, and it's up to YOU to recognize that.

[ShySoul]

You are sad because you invested two years of time and a part of your heart into a person that ultimately wasn't worth your love and couldn't appreciate what he had. Even if you logically know he wasn't good, it takes time for the heart to catch up. But know you'll be fine and in time you'll be able to see him fully for what he is. He was the one not worthy of you. Someone else out there will be worthy. of you. And more importantly, you are worthy in your own right, no man needed.

Your hurt will heal. Meanwhile he will continue to hurt himself with meaningless flings that will ultimately leave him empty and unfulfilled. You're the one who is better off. 

[SooSad33]

So it was on and off ( first problem)... and he doesn't care, by his behaviour.. continuing on with younger gals.

Oh, what a thrill.  

He's probably never had a long lasting relationship & will always be single.  This is someone you do NOT want in your life!  His loss 😉 .

I knew a playboy like this years ago, I wasted longer time than this.  I wish I had more strength than I did at that time! 😕 .. But, we live & learn.

You will be fine.  Look to find a real man!  Someone you know does value you 🙂