Just wondering if anyone else is suspicious when a guy comes on too strong too soon.
I met someone though the course of my work. There seemed to be an initial attraction, so I was not too surprised when he contacted me via Facebook. He asked me out and I accepted. He asked me for my number and we started chatting on the phone. The initial date was good, but a little awkward--I just chalked it up to first date jitters. He started calling every day and I accomodated him, but after a few days he started complaining that I did not talk to him long enough; e.g., more than fifteen minutes and that he could not reach me in the mornings (I am a doctor and am typically busiest in the am). I told him nicely that that is my schedule. He asked me on a second date during the week and I perhaps accepted a bit too soon. We made plans to have dinner at a local spot near my apartment, but he showed up with a bottle of wine and after dinner he prolonged leaving. We kissed a bit but I wasn't sure I was feeling it, so I asked him to leave, since it was a "school" night so to speak and I needed to wash my hair. His response? "You don't have that much hair." I told him I wanted to take things slow and he said "Ok" in a mocking tone of voice.
For some reason he took this as a green light to go forward and in addition to calling, started texting and emailing. At dinner the following week, I emphasized again that I wanted to take things slow and said that as far as I was concerned we were at the stage where we were casually dating. He wanted to know exactly how long it would take me to decide whether I wanted to be with him. This was date #3. I asked him to please limit his phonecalls and encouraged him to spend time with his friends. Coincidentally, I get an email a few days later saying that he was out drinking with a friend and that it "could have been me." His texting & emailing increased to several times a day and he would ask to come over when we had not made plans. I told him firmly to please slow down because he was overwhelming me, and he backed off a bit. I went on another date but my initial attraction to him has sort of fizzled. He seems too clingy and needy.
This man is 45, has never been married, and from what I know has not had a relationship that has lasted more than a year or two. He seems reallly awkward despite being bright. He will say & do things that most people would not do to someone they were interested in, like kick me under the table at dinner. He doesn't seem to have many friends and I'm beginning to think he has Asperger's Disorder. He does not seem to grasp nonverbal cues & makes odd references to things. He's also got a bit of that "crazy in the eye" look.
On the upside he's a kind person, really bright, has a professional degree, and clearly wants a serious relationship.
Has anyone else had a similar experience that can relate.