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THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE - SuperDave71


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Day 7:

 

Feeling ok, Not bad. I think about it but it's not unbearbly painfull like it was before when I found out she had a bf. I have a face to this guy and man is he ugly wow!

 

I'm guessing she's blocking me again. I have her blocked as well. We have not talked since last thursday when she cancelled valentines dinner plans.

 

I have to stick to this and be the better person. I will not say or do anything.

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He emailed me. Wants to meet up for a drink... guess what?! I don't actually want to go!!! My date from last week (with a guy I dated years ago) went so well, I've been speaking to him tons and we're out again tomorrow night!

 

Don't care much for my ex now. My engery lies elsewhere. Just seeing this other guy has made me realise Mark really wasn't for me anyway!!

 

Life feels good. Even with the hangover from hell I'm nursing today

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Day 5... Doing a little better each day. Cannot wait to reach day 30 because I know I will feel so much better by then. Honestly, I do believe no contact is the best thing because I feel better not knowing what is going on with him. I mean, dont get me wrong, I assume the worst as normal people do in that he has maybe forgotten me or has moved onto someone else already, but I look forward to the day that this thought no longer bothers me.

 

Day 5...keep racking them up!

 

(No contact from his side as of yet)

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Day 3 been a month since we last saw each other

 

*shrug* I WANT to hear from her but I think I finally have it in my mind to never contact her again. Would respond though...if it wasn't something mundane. The days seem to go by smoother but I still get those thoughts of her w/ another guy that ruin the calm.

 

Yea I always assume the worse too Irish, hell it's gotten me i trouble with her before when we were together lol. Blew things out of proportion.

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Day 42

 

I still miss her, and think about her a lot.

 

I also was thinking why I think about a person so much when we last spoke she said, "I am seeing someone else and I am happier than when I was with you" thats harsh, and just plain hurtful. Even if this were true for me I would never tell someone that. Especially someone I had been with for five years.

 

Why I ask? She was always so sweet and kind and happy. She never said a hurtful thing to me. We had a couple arguments in our time, but nothing was EVER said that came remotely close to that. From me or her.

 

I feel like the person I was with has been replaced by someone I never met. It really is a sad thing to experience.

 

 

Christ i must have been going out with your exs twin sister,had exactly the same thing,5 years,no problems etc and now shes happier with the new fella.

Its all so scary that we dont know the girls we dated for all those years

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It'll be back to 2 days in 5 minutes, lol...I'm an idiot!

 

those moments of weakness come...i've been experiencing it really bad lately as well. I want to reconcile but also don't want that thought of hope lingering in my head if it really is all over, from what she's been saying to me lately it isn't.

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Day 8-

 

I had a few moments of sadness today. The weather here in Vancouver turned absolutely beautiful. 15 degrees celcius and bright sun.. this was the weather we had our first dates on. You can sense spring around the corner and it just has that energy in it.. .. I'm lonely.

 

As for the situation. She is in another relationship and at least she is showing she is this time instead of me being an ass for months not knowing she had a bf.

 

THis may be the best thing to happen for both of us. THis will really be our time to heal. We never really got it.

 

She has tried to mask and forget me, but it kind of makes me feel good that she's struggling to find ways to forget about me.

 

She won't forget about me.

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Day 34 is almost over.

If I don't post here, I would seriously have lost count.

 

Anyway yesterday night I was using my sister's PC to play games...when my ex MSN her again. This it the 3rd time it has happened in 2 weeks. Whatever. I just clicked on the "X" button and resumed playing.

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After some LC everyday for the past 5 weeks i think its best for me to go NC... for myself! Its hard not to think about her though, anyone got any tips to make this easier?

I try and keep busy but sometimes i get distracted?

 

i think im going to need some help with this...

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Been in contact with the ex... he's been emailing me. I agree NC works for some... don't care if I'm NC or not now... I'm moving on regardless.

 

My way won't work for everyone, but dating other ppl works wonders - honest. You realise that the ex isn't always what you thought they were and tha there are other ppl out on par or even better. In the past week, I've had the best week ever. Even told my ex that I'm seeing someone else and he said he's jealous - made me feel really good!!!!

 

Good luck everyone!

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just checking in, i have no idea how many days its been since it ended and i left. ~ first week of dec

 

i can tell you i exchanged an email with her last monday to inquire about an update on my stuff being shipped down to me. its been 3 weeks since i sent her my new address.

well i got a long email back from her. this long sob story about how hard its been for her because she's had to pay all the rent/bills/etc her self since i left, how much shes been working lately and how stressed out she is. she doesnt have the $ available right now to ship my stuff down (which she promised she'd do before I left).

well shortly after i read that email i forced myself to call her. right away i could tell by the tone in her voice she was completely stress out, i felt sad for her. we talk for a few and i reminded her that this was all her decision i tried to work through this but again i left because she asked me to. i asked her if there was anything i could do to help, like book the movers etc...

well later that night i sent her an email back. basically i'm sorry shes so stressed out from her life right now, i feel sad for her. again i said if there was anything i could do to help such as booking the movers etc..

next morning i got a 1 line email back.

"you could pay for it yourself, that would really help me out"

wow just wow,

not only did i support her when we lived on the east coast, I supported the move back to her home town to be with her family, i left for her, i've done countless things she has asked me to do since the day we met. life changes on more then 3 occasions, now to ask me to pay for this myself when its something she promised.

not only have i done what she wanted by leaving within 2 days of it being over ugh...

 

i feel her so called "friends" and new gf are behind this telling her she shouldnt pay for it.

that my stuff being there is an inconvenience to her.

saying all these horrible things about me to convince her otherwise.

 

so lame.

 

but i will take the high road and just take care of this myself with no reply.

 

its a shame. i still love her and care about her so much and every day i think of that.

 

oh new stress in my life... Apple recently contacted me about a job. we had a 1hr phone interview on thursday. yesterday i heard back from them. they want to fly me in on monday put me up for the night and in-person interview on tuesday morning. this is a great opportunity for my career and for my line of work it would be completely stupid of me to pass on this job. mine as well start a new career if I say no.

cons: what makes it hard for me is leaving all my friends who have truly helped me through all the hard times recently. starting over again in a new city and all the stuff that comes with that.

pros: a huge move fwd in my career!!

 

anyways, keep on keeping on. times get better and worse at the same time.

its been almost 3 months for me and i've seem to have slipped back into a funk.

i know its from recent contact, but i'm forcing myself to focus on prepairing for this interview with apple.

 

its amazing how much control we let ex's have even though they are out of our lives.

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i'm on day 2 and i can tell you i have no desire to contact my ex right now. it does help when you are kinda pissed off at him. he has text me all this week and when i didn't respond back to him, i get a text asking if he did or said something to make me ignore him. i'm pissed b/c ever since we broke up, he has not called me once. it has only been texts. i'm sick of the texting. he even text me about a job i was waiting to find out about. i was dying to get this job b/c it would have been a new opportunity and a lot more money. well i didn't get it. he text me to ask me about it. i simple text back that i didn't get it. i'm just completely sick of the text messaging. so until he can actually pick up the phone and call me, i'm done talking to him. i've always none that he doesn't like talking on the phone but this is ridiculous. if he wants to be "friends", i'm not going to do it through texting or any other non-verbal communication.

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Hmm Pretty much on my day 2 of no contact..after we both said a goodbye in text yday.

Its pretty hard to be honest and i find it hard to concentrate on my uni work!

 

The worst thing is - I wish i knew if she missed me!i want her to miss me as much as i miss her...

we went ouot for 2.5yrs so id hope she misses something about me

if i knew she was thinking about me i think this would be easier...

What do you think?

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I am on day 18....at times it feels like the days have flown by..but there are days like today when I get really stuck in a lot of negative thinking...why I am not sure but that is ther reason for my no contact....I thnk that it was a gift from my ex...I have had a lot of anxiety issues that I have tried to address on and off without much committment or success. During the whole relationship I was anxious and I am sure that vibe was picked up and certainly masked a lot of who I am .....regardless of this relationship..if I do not address my anxiety issue I am doomed to keep repeating patterns and be with wonderful people that will not last......so I am doing no contact for me with a committment of 30 and then reevaluate the situation after that..but I know that I need at least 6 weeks....

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Day 6

 

I keep slowly racking the days up. As soon as I reach the day, I realize that six days really isnt that much of time. When I get to 30, I will be so happy. I am starting to heal more and feel stronger each day. Actually starting to believe that he did not treat me as well as I deserved. He had no reason to complain and I am proud of myself for going NC because at the end of it, I will be healed and also because it shows him I am not so attached to him as he assumed I was.

 

Day 6...more to come.

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Day 35

So I unblocked him on MSN yesterday.

 

I've decided to test my strength. Whether I'm still vulnerable to him and such.

 

Hi LilBear...I've done this before and I don't recommend it...it set me back. I think you will know when you are strong enough. When you are strong enough and have moved on, you will not feel any need to see whether or not you're vulnerable to him...you won't even be thinking about him.

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