SamT

Ok, I thought I would do a quick post on here while I have the time. I did this No contact challenge around 2 years ago. Im glad to see the thread is still going! I will say that doing it was very hard, but once you get through it, trust me you will feel so much better! And it really works you know. So for everyone that's struggling to cope - stick to it! it's the best thing you can do

Hey guys just thought id drop in... not sure what day im on exactly.. but its all going pretty well i dont think about her as much nowadays maybe because im feeling so much better or maybe because ive been distracted by other women telling me how amazing i am haha! anyway, hang in there guys... you really have to get through the pain to see the light on the other side x

Thanks Hope Springs it turns out, i have recently been thinking about this other girl, she was really respectful of my relationship with my ex and even had the guts to tell me! We get on pretty well, and i know she is much more mature (as shes a few years older). Im not going to start anything though, because i dont think im ready... but it would be good if she could restore my faith in women! haha And im going out tonight, so i hope my ex doesnt ruin it all for me Agaain. Im acctually a bit worried I havent had a good one in months! Mustang, i feel you man, im pretty sure she must be acting this way because she just doesnt want to let her guard down. I think she must be hurting, especially if you had a long relationship.. she could just be stubborn, and mightve put a wall up. its best for you to carry on as you are man... youll get better, honestly! Even then, you'll find someone better that will treat you properly ... and wont drop a bomshell like this on you! bronte thanks for your support hun x GetMeBack i dont really know what to say to you! you do have a tough situation! Im glad your NC with your current ex is getting better, as for your other ex..hmm it might be good for you to do NC with him to? im not completely sure.. i mean its good that he's helping you out.. but its true he might have a hidden agenda... maybe you could explain this all to him? and he might stick by you? hope your ok hun x Keep Faith Everyone! x

Awww thanks for that Hope Springs! i have needed a hug honey im not denying that NC is a good thing! i do believe it works.. im not trying to put anyone off either.. I am in NC guys honestly, But i know now that she still cares for me, so its reciprocated. I feel better, and i willl move on, especially with everything ive learnt. I will still continue the NC process/challange, im just not sure if ill count down the days... it could be 60days for all i know... i just want to let myself heal without the clock ticking. I know what you mean about her possibly thinking she has me on the back burner, but honestly? even if she thinks she does..she'll get a kick in the A*** when she finds out or sees me on a date with someone else... im not waiting for her anymore. Even if she begs me, id expect her to learn more about herself first, and in a sense 'Grow up' Im going out tonight... wish me luck! Shes ruined the recent outings ive had, so i am a bit apprehensive i have to admit xx

Okay guys, id just like to get some things out - she did respond eventually to the email. I wont deny that it was great to hear from her, and i do feel relieved that i got some things off my chest. I do feel free right now. I know that she has some uncondtional love for me too, so im relieved to know that i havent been giving everything. She expressed that she still thinks about me everyday, and that she still really cares about me. She knows ill move on sometime, and said that id make an amazing boyfriend I know that im still hurting from some things, like her moving on so suddenly, and i know shes getting involved with another guy. I told her this and i said i still cared, and hoped she doesnt rush into anything, she assured me that she wasnt though. Ive learnt knew things about myself, that evolves around my depression. I know that its not all because of her. I only wish that she could help me get through it, but i guess it might make me stronger if i make it through on my own.. ? I know i have a lot to offer, so all is not lost... i know one day we might be friends, i agree with her that its too early right now. But i regard her as one of the main people that understands everything about me. There must be other girls out there though, and we might even make a better relationship. Id love for that to happen.. Im not looking to get back with my ex anymore, especially after the hurt she has recently caused me, and after seeing (i hate to say it) flaws. I know she has some immature characteristics that she needs to grow out of...I just wonder when the day will come when she sees them.. i am worried for her. Shes not right for me, at least not right now. I look forward to fully move on, and meet someone brilliant! I will continue NC guys, im not fully sure wether ill continue the challange by counting down the days though... im not sure if it works for me, because it feels like im expecting something after the 30 days. I believe we can all heal, but the time is irrelevant and is specific to each person.. 30 days i guess could be the average. I will continue to keep everyone updated on my process though. And i will gladly give anyone support on this website. I hope youre all doing well. All my Best, Sam xx

I know honey, i am still getting to grips with the depression. My other friend thats been through a lot has helped me through some things, and i have learnt things about myself. I know i could have waited, but i know that if i do NC from this point onwards, may it be LC or NC or even both, i will find it easier to cope. Being in that state of NC was really bad for me i think, because i felt shackled to the pain and to thoughts about her constantly. I want to set myself free know.x

It did seem a bit strange, thats why i didnt understand well i turns out she sent my a reply via facebook, because i sent the same email via a message too. She said that she does think about my everyday, and hopes im doing ok. She said she understood everything in the email. Said shes moving on, and hopes that i am too. She also said that shes not ready for a friendship yet, because she worries that i still have hopes of getting back together, she said the chances are almost nil. (should i be optomistic about them being ALMOST nil?) hahah anyway, i sent an email back telling her i have no agenda anymore... because i really think i dont guys...i have began to accept that there are other people out there, and i know that i can make another girl happy. she said it herself. i think i just miss talking to her, because she was the closest person ive ever had in my life... x

OHhhh i have a confession i sent an email, please dont shout. lol... but this email was very important and she needed to read it. it was very personal and wasnt even about me trying to get back with her.. it was just explaining things, that have been going on post and pre- breakup. i did save it as a draft, but eventually i did send it. I couldnt handle leaving things as they were okay, its not in my nature. but the worst thing is...i know she didnt even read it, she deleted it without opening it. Dont ask me how i know - her account was 'remembered' on my comp, and i know i shudnt have, but i needed to know quickly if shed gotten the msg how could she have done that? i really wasnt expecting it. im worse than ever now. it was a really important email. probally the most immportant ive ever sent. i cant believe it.x

Yeah i know...wish i had some sign, shes keeping pretty strong right now lol all i want is an apology to be honest!

haha, i dont take my phone out nowadays, or i just give it to a mate! messenger- yeah i see what you mean.. thats a good way of looking at it..hmm... i was just wondering if it wud make my NC easier, and possbily harder for her mwahah i do hope shes feeling guilty for hanging up on me and shouting last time, i hope she has a damn conscience! shes gone stone cold, so im not sure! x

i just dont know, i feel like ringing her... but im scared if she doesnt answer... why hasnt she broken!lol mind games! i feel like i need to end this on a happier note, its driving me insane x

i want that! ^^^ x

ok.. ill keep it up... i dont want to prevent any good progress i think im just missing talking to her in general. not sure..x

yeah i dont think ive fully accepted it i dont think i ever will to be honest i might just break NC - befriend her - then leave..lol i know that sounds silly, but i hate the way we ended things..it bugs me more than the acctual breakup i think x

i swear this is going to kill me before i heal. feels like internal bleeding