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AngryHeart

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Everything posted by AngryHeart

  1. AngryHeart
    Day 28!! - The one month mark..yay. Because I found out he's probably got a new gf the other night, these last couple days have been hard again. The fact he's apparently only been with her a couple weeks, and claims she's the love of his life, gives me mixed emotions. On one hand it makes me feel like crap. Like garbage that's just been tossed and replaced! On the other hand, I can't help but giggle. This man is 28, and he says this about someone he's been with just 2 weeks?! That's a big red flag I think, and it probably won't work out in the long run. Ha ha.
  2. AngryHeart
    You are both right. I need to delete his number. And yes, it's pretty foolish to say she's the love of his life, after 2 weeks!!! I was a few months ago! Oh how times change! lol. He'll probably either get fed up with her, or she will break his heart. I may be wrong, but given how he seems to feel so strong so soon, it's probable. It's so horrible thinking about him being all happy with her, and sleeping with her and that ... Maybe I'm selfish, but I can't bear to think of that, and hope it don't work out. Argh.
  3. AngryHeart
    Day 27 - well, the one month mark Monday! I've been here before but then messed up. I hope this time will be different. I'm trying to get into either working, or studying next week, so at least I'll have other things on my mind. It's been like 5 months we've been split up. I still miss him very much, and wish things were back to how they were...or how I thought they were more like! But this evening I saw our mutual friend. He tells me first the ex has been sleeping around (which I think really is NOT like him), then says he says he has a new girlfriend, and that he claims she is the love of his life, eventhough he's been with her 2 weeks! That realllly made me feel like crap. I think I believe he has got a new woman, atlough it's hard to know the truth, because this friend that told me is backwards...and is known to get things, uh, wrong. But it wouldn't surprise me at all. I keep wondering what the truyth is, but the fact still remains he doesn't wanna be with me - girlfriend or not!!! Thing is that friend gave me my ex's new number...arrgghh, and I took it, because i wasn't really thinking straight. It was silly of me because now I have another, easier, way to contact him other thn by email if I break. I may delete it, argh, dunno. But I am not going to contact him for now, and hope I never do! I was a fool for taking his number, lol. RANT OVER.
  4. AngryHeart
    Day 21 - We've been broken up like 5 months now, that's almost the same time we were together for, lol. Yet I'm still finding it hard to let go off. I'm having a bit of a hard time today for some unknown reason. Just want to talk to him again. It hurts that he's not bothered to contact me at all in these last 21 days, and didn't reply to my last "goodbye email" But then again I did say I couldn't speak to him, needed to move on,etc. maybe he took that as me not even wanting a reply, I dunno, who knows apart from him! He not been in his local pub for quite a while now. At least not anytime my mum is there. And I went in there the first time in months, and since the break-up, and he wasn't there then either. I dunno what is going on in his life, but just can't help wonder if he has a new gf or what That thoght reallly sucks! I also have that old age question -- did I mess up by saying I wanted NC? What if he WANTS to contact me, but because of what I said feels he can't?? Good luck to everyone else *hugss*
  5. AngryHeart
    Hey. Oh, he doesn't have that same number as he did when he sent those texts. Sorry, should have probably said that, lol. So there's no danger of me texting him, I don't have his new number! The only real way I have of contacting him is by email, or if I see him in person. I haevn't seen him since the split at all, and haven't emailed for 14 days now. Well, will be 14 in an hourish!! If he had the same number it would be a lot harder, so I'm NOW pretty glad that I don't have it. Good luck to everyone, I'm rooting for you. It DOES get easier, I promise
  6. AngryHeart
    Day 13..thought about contacting him, missing him quite a lot tonight. It's probably because I read his old text messages on my phone last night. I know that I should get rid of them, but I just can't yet! Too importand or something? I dunno. But I just reminded myself that I've broken NC a few times, and nothing good has come of it yet, and probably won't ever. The only time that I should break it, is if he breaks it first, and even then I need to be wary. My mum went into his local, he wasn;t there and neither were his "friends", made me wonder where he is and who with, etc. But I need to try and stop, because it'll just prolong the pain, I know this! Still tomorrow is a new day, and fingers crossed he'll be off my mind more!
  7. AngryHeart
    Day 5. Sent him a final email Monday, telling him some of what I think, and saying bye I need to heal. He didn't even bloody answer...he never does, oh yeah he can small talk as much as the next person, but when it comes to the past and anything that is anything, he doesn't wanna know. He is selfish. Still not the easiest thing in the world, but been A LOT easier. Because I have more important things to worry about. Trying to heal from the past (bad experiences) and it's made me think, the pain that he has caused me, all the stress, wondering, etc. just isn't worth it. I have been through SO much more important things than this. I also had someone before him who did actually love me, and did treat me right, sadly he had to leave me because things were too stressful, I wasn't as good to him as I should have been. But I had a dream about him last night, and it's made me realise I really am silly mopeing around about a guy that doesn't love me, and probably never even did. Don't get me wrong, I'll still have my setbacks, I still miss him often, think about him, etc. but I know it's mainly because of my abandoment issues, and other issues, than him as a person. I did love him, I do still in A WAY...but he's certainly not all that and I have more important things to spend my time thinking about.
  8. AngryHeart
    Day 5 apparently. Gawd time went by while debating on NC and LC, lol. I feel positive about it today...want to just move on and meet someone who is RIGHT for me
  9. AngryHeart
    Honeyspur, thanks for the mention!!!
  10. AngryHeart
  11. AngryHeart
    Nah, I already asked him before and he basicaly said he wanted just friendship. I chose to ignore it and lie to myself, lol. UGH, as hard as it is think it's time for NC again, but for good this time.
  12. AngryHeart
    Guys, I'm in LC at the mo, but I have a question. I'm thinking of just straight out telling him how I feel, and asking him if he'd be willing to give us another chance. And if he says no at least I then know. And then I can NC and heal?? Wha do you think?? I don't like the wondering.
  13. AngryHeart
    If you don't feel you're ready, don't do it I don't know, nobody can really asnwer that question. NC may not have any effect on the relationship, it may have lots, it may have a little. Who knows? Sadly we cannot predict the future, and we just have to wait and seee! To be honest, if they're gonna want us back, they're gonna...as long as we don't act like total idiots (begging, or the oppsite..being mean) nothing we do is gonna have that much effect, if they want us back they just will. You get me?
  14. AngryHeart
    Sam, to be honest I sometimes wonder if staying in LC, and kinda "weening" yourself off the ex, is infact easier than going strict NC. I seem to find it is in a way. That's usually what the dumpers do with the dumpees. They take time, slowly let go off dumpees. Maybe that is what we need to do sometimes, to let go off them. And maybe then there's still the chance of getting back...if that makes sense? Alssoo, I think in some situations, treating it like you've not even been together before, but they are just someone you like a lot and trying to persue. Obviously this one is hard because of the hurt, anger, etc. involved. But I do think in some cases this could also work. Look at it as a clean slate, leaving the past in the past, and treating it as something new. Make sense? I dunno, maybe I'm talking rubbish, but I'm just looking at the whole NC/LC thing at a new angle. In a way I feel happier when in LC than NC....
  15. AngryHeart
    Hey, honey, you seem quite clued up on these things Do you have any advice on LC?
  16. AngryHeart
    Sam, why did you break up? How much NC have you had, etc.?
  17. AngryHeart
    He he, thanks. I'm gonna try the LC route. See where it goes. If I end up just feeling hurt again, I walk away again. But I just feel this is the way to go for now. At the moment I feel OK about it. I got a polite and happy response, he didn't have to reply at all. I know it doesn't mean he wants me back by any means, but I'm happy to chat a little for now. Eventhough I really miss him, I have come to a point in my life where things are getting better, with or without him! I have realised I don't need him or anybody else to make me happy. It's just that I want to share my life with him. But I have more things in my life right now, that are important. Back in touch with old and new friends, aiming to get a job, etc. I have taken this break up and finially made the most of it! So eventhough I do want him back, I'm not banking on it, I'm not exactly waiting for it, and I have other things in my life to help make me happy. I don't think LC is gonna hurt at this point.
  18. AngryHeart
    True. Getmeback - There could still be hope. I would leave it a while, see if he contacts you during that time. If he does maybe it's worth carrying on and trying. It's early days...you only got back in contact with him...what? 2 days ago? How long ago did you split and did you have contact with him after at all? If so how long for? And the application is "PhotoFlexer"
  19. AngryHeart
    *hides*
  20. AngryHeart
    Thanks. Well, it was from an application on Facebook actually, that lets you decorate pictures, lol.
  21. AngryHeart
    OK, so day 11 and NC is broken.,.by me. I never replied to his last email from 11 days ago, but never said I wanted NC, and left him thinking we were "friends" I sent him a simple "hello, was just thinking about you" kind of email. Cool, collected, upbeat (I think!) He sent one back like an hour later...just a nice, upbeat email back saying hello. *sigh* I dunno...I just can't let it go. I keep thinking maybe through LC and friendship, something more will come of it. So for now NC is broken again, and we will see what happens from here.....
  22. AngryHeart
    In an hour it'll be day 10. I've been close a few times, but not given in. I'm getting there. He doesn't take up my every thought anymore. Obviously I still miss him, and think of him a lot, just not allll the tiiimmmeee like before I've also been struggling wth the "should I contact him after the 30 days is up?" "what if he contacts me first" but I'm just telling myself, for now I am not contacting him, and I'll worry about that day when it comes! I do still wish we were together, but I also realise he probably isn't the one for me, and he's not as sweet as I thought and he made out. Not since the break-up at least. He's also going down a lonely road, but he chose it, I can't do anything about it, and won't be his back up, or his counceller! NC is empowering...it's just not easy. I hope thjat everyone are doing okay, keep on going, it's worth it!
  23. AngryHeart
    It's offically day 8 since I've contacted him, day 7 since he's contacted me. My mum saw him in the pub tonight. He was alone and was complaining about his "friend", who he has fallen out with. My mum said he kept going on like an old lady. That made me laugh Apparently he was all alone, complaining about how this friend treats him, and then left not long after. Seems like his plans aren't working sooo well. I don't wish him unhappiness But I'd be a liar if I said I don't smile a little bit, when I here things aren't so well on his end. I do get this little feeling he may be contacting me soon, after seeing my mum tonight. Probably to complain to me too...but maybe that's just hope, so I'm not banking on it...
  24. AngryHeart
    Today is day 7. Yay, a week! lol. I am missing him today again. The weekends are always hardest
  25. AngryHeart
    Day 5 Soon to be day 6! There really is something empowering about NC, it's taking control of a situation you thought you had no control of. Not getting them back -- but just getting you back and keeping your dignity, etc. With that said I'm having a rough few hours. I just really miss him right now, and wish I was with him. And I just feel like "why wasn't I good enough" you know It hurts and it sucks. He said I was the best thing to happen to him, and in my eyes I was. So what happened?
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