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My first date EVER in my life at 36(maybe)???(update)

quietgrl

By quietgrl
in Dating Advice

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quietgrl Mentor

quietgrl

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Kinda update.aaaahhhh i'm still shaking and can't stop smiling.I just gave my male co worker my phone number and email address.I've never ever done this in my whole life approach a man offline.I'm on cloud nine and i don't even care if he call me.LOL well kinda. Oh gosh i have to tell the story.

Ok i'm waiting at the train station for my male co -worker to arrive and he's late.I'm getting nerves because my train is coming and what my co-worker didn't know today was my last day at work for 3 months.I won't be seeing him until feb so i had to give him my number today.Sooo my train coming and he walks out the building and toward the station.I ran up to him , look into my male co-worker eye and said "Hello i've been meaning to give this to you." I handed him a note with my name,my phone number and email address and ran into my train

Oh my gosh my co -worker was scared to look into my eyes and all he keep saying was"aaaaa".He had a had time completing a sentence.Well everything up to him now.Will he call or email me??? All i know when i boarded the train.He was opening my letter and he was scared to look at me board the train.This guy is shy.

I'm soo proud of myself for aproaching a man and giving him my number.Why can't men do the same for me?

anhhhhh i finally did it.It took me 5 months to ask him but i finally did it. Yeeeeesssss!!

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quietgrl Mentor

quietgrl

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My male co-worker is shy that's why i gave him my phone number AND my email address. A shy/quiet/introvert person not going to call right away but they will email a person right away.

I can't get his face out of my mind.I said hello and his words didn't make sense and he wouldn't look at me.

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quietgrl Mentor

quietgrl

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Hey don't laugh because someone your age can learn from a person like me. I wish i could go back and relive my teenage years.I wouldn't change not being a virgin but i would have maded should i enjoy my teenager years and dated boys still remaining a virgin. That's the only thing i regrat not my virginity but not casual dating.

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SW Collaborator

SW

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Reading this made me smile and feel good. I hope for your success.

 

I'm 36 too and didn't have a first date until I was 33. Thats why I came to this website , because I was older with no dating experience. This site has helped me a lot. i too regret not dating when I was a teenager, but then again I was afraid of girls then.

 

Good luck

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hosswhispra Mentor

hosswhispra

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I would give it a few days, quietgrl. It can go either way right now.

 

Three years ago, I was in your shoes. It did not go my way but I learned something new from the experience. I learned that I had courage to try. Even though I did not have 'success' I am glad I tried something new.

 

Would I do it again? Probably not. But it's not because I did not succeed. I just want someone who will put that 'extra' effort in (that I was always putting in), for me now.

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SquareWheel Collaborator

SquareWheel

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Quietgrl, maybe I could offer a little gentle advice... in your posts, you come off sounding a mite pessimistic and even a little depressive. I wonder, are you projecting that kind of personality when you're around people in person?

 

I used to be that way too. But then at the time I had no interest in interacting with people. Anyway, I now have an idea about attracting people into your life that might be helpful for you.

 

My idea is that your life can be compared to a store, restaurant, or any other public place in that if you want people to want to come into it, you need to make it an interesting, or fun, or inviting place to be. I mean, if you pass a store with gloomy atmosphere and drab-looking merchandise, do you really feel like going inside and checking it out? Probably not.

 

If you really want to attract people, including guys, into your life, I think it's important to dress up your life and make it look like a fun/interesting place to be. Sweep up any dust you can see, clear out the cobwebs, and brighten the decor any way you can.

 

Find one or two interesting hobbies to get into, or at least have a little involvement in them so you can talk about them. For example, try hot air ballooning, maybe just once or twice, and then you can talk enthusiastically about how it feels floating in the sky and seeing the countryside go by below you. One or two things like that will make your life look a lot more fascinating.

 

But really, just giving the impression that you're having fun and enjoying your life will by itself make people want to get involved in it.

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Lansing Community Regular

Lansing

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Yeah.. I kind of agree with Squarewheel but, I think you should be having fun just to enjoy your life in general, with, or without a guy. I agree thought that your attitude seems very negative and I am SURE that comes through when interacting with guys...

 

I find it very hard to believe that every guy you have ever talked to has wanted just sex from you. Try to make some guy friends even. Even if you have to make it clear you aren't interested in dating them. What about female friends? Do you have a large social circle?

 

I don't understand how every guy who meets you would want "just sex".

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quietgrl Mentor

quietgrl

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Square,

I am so tired of men right now.I don't even want to look at you guys .Men claim they want a good woman.Well here the &%*% i am but no man wants me.All men want is women who will give them sex in the drop of a hat or treat them like crap. I'm the dumby that treats men good and wants sex with comittment and i'm not worth dating.Well men of the world *&&^ you.

Square offline you would never know i was a virgin or piss off at men because men never approach me unless they want sex.I'm ALWAY the one apporaching men for dates and i'm tired of it. I've been doing things by myself all my life.What i want is to experience going out on a date and having a boyfriend but men don't want to give me a chance.

I'm soo tired of hearing this one go out there,do something and men will come to you.Well that's a BIG lie. Gosh i want to scream right now and hit some men in the face for being so stupid. The only way i can get a man is by screwing every man in site. PEOPLE MEN DON"T WANT ME. I put myself out there and everytime i do. I prove my case everytime.

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Batya33 Grand Master

Batya33

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No, respectfully, you do not. You are referring to specific men who you have pursued, not "all men" - we have all been rejected, me included. The common denominator is you - if you are projecting negativitiy or neediness or any kind of depressive attitude that is going to cut way down on your success with men. In addition, a negative attitude toward "men" of course will also drive them away and for good reason!

 

I have dated many men and been in serious relationships with several men. I have also met and interacted with certain men who only wanted "one thing" or who rejected me or disrespected me. None of those experiences made me negative towards "all men" (well maybe on the particular day it happened). In my dating and serious relationships for the most part I have been treated with respect and like a lady and managed to have quite a bit of fun along the way. I treat men the same way. I am reasonably attractive, intelligent, compassionate and I like to think - interesting and witty too (and modest!). I carry myself like I like myself (not in a cocky way - in a reasonably confident way).

 

You don't have to date or socialize - this is your choice. But please don't blame your choice on others.

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