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Help, I've been seeing this guy for two months now


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I've been seeing this guy for two months and I really like him a lot but his texting skills are killing me. I usually initiate the text or a date but he always into me whenever we're together. ( We have been sleeping together and I even stayed over a night one time) Most of the time he replied to my text but sometimes he doesn't. I don't know if he likes me or not. It's been a week since my last text and I haven't heard from him. Should I text him again or not.  

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You are not dating a guy if he is ignoring you for a week. He is just "slow fading" or was never there in a first place as he see you as a casual thing. People that date you shouldnt be "obsessed" with you, that is another extreme. But there should be a timely window where they can shoot you a message, call you etc. If he just ignores you for a week that means that he just simply doesnt care and his level of interest in anything is very small. 

You can text him and see what is going on. But his silence should tell you what you need to know. He will probably just invent some BS excuse how "he was busy". But for a week he could shoot you amessage or call you if he wanted to hear from you. But the harsh truth is that he just doesnt want that. 

36 minutes ago, moomooland said:

I don't know if he likes me or not.

That shouldnt matter. You are having sex so he likes you at least on some level. You should be asking is "Does he wants a relationship with me?". Because from all this you wrote, he just doesnt want that.

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Unfortunately I don’t think it’s his texting skills that are killing you. It’s his obvious lack of interest in you besides use for sex. 

1 hour ago, moomooland said:

I've been seeing this guy for two months and I really like him a lot but his texting skills are killing me. I usually initiate the text or a date but he always into me whenever we're together.

That’s because he wants sex. I’m sorry, but dating shouldn’t be this hard. If someone doesn’t respond to me after a week and we’ve been “dating” for two months, they are either dead or in jail, that’s the only logical excuse. It is clear you’re way more into him than he is you, so back off and don’t let yourself be used. Do not text him again. He has a phone, he can read, he can operate basic technology. He’s made a deliberate choice not to respond to you and that’s a giant red flag. 

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People know what they do.  They are not bad texters, poor communicators, scared of commitment, etc... They do what they want because they don't fear the consequences of their actions.  Here are some fundamental truths-- We can never change another person.  Nothing we do makes them respond differently than how they intended to respond all along.  

The only thing we can do is look at a situation through the lens of our own expectations. You are expecting better behavior, based on what you are doing.  But your behavior cannot influence another's.  It can only impact how YOU will feel when they behave how they always were going to.

Case in point-- I met a guy on line and after talking we decided to meet.  It was around the holidays and I had these fancy caramel apples that I was giving out to friends and acquaintances I met during the holiday week.  I decided to take him one.  Ok he was gracious and all when I gave it to him.  That was not a big deal. 

However, by the end of the meet and greet, I thought he was a real jerk.  Just the way he treated others and his language, I knew I would NEVER date this guy.  I never saw him again, but I mentioned to a friend, "what a waste of an apple!" LOL

That is what this guy is-- he hasn't texted you in a week.  Never talk to him again.  He is a waste of an apple. LOL

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2 hours ago, moomooland said:

I don't know if he likes me or not.

It sounds as if you made it too easy for him, as in putting the cart before the horse.  I'm not sure why you slept with him while not knowing if he even lkes you.  As you found out, that's not what it takes to seal the deal.

He only texts you when he feels like it, which should tell you where his interest lies. In short I'd  block him, and take the lesson with me.

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A man who is interested in you (for more than sex) is not going to let an entire week pass without getting in touch. 

Yes. It's really that simple. If he's been silent it's because he isn't that into you. This is one-sided and I would personally call it a day and not text him anymore. 

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I read an article on a mens magazine website asking why they don’t respond or reach out. The over whelming answer was because they didn’t want to. Maybe because they are with someone else or they are not that into you.
He’s awesome when you are together because he’s playing you. Saying all the right things. Men like this will do or say anything to get sex and it worked. 
Actions speak louder than their words. His lack of communication between dates is something you should see as a red flag. I get it we dismiss stuff when we really like someone we have all done it. When it doesn’t feel right that because it’s not. Dump this chump. Date those who treat you the way you expect to be treated and that includes your expectations. He’s not texting regularly like you expect, you don’t fight it you know your self worth and send them to the curb. 

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Thanks for the advices everyone. 

He texted me today but want to do something on Sunday. We usually meet every Sunday but I told him if he's on call , I don't want to try to see him. He works in hospital, this is his first year of residency. I know his schedule are very busy. I guess I expected to get a response earlier than a week. 

 I haven't replied to him and not sure if I want to anymore. 

 

 

 

 

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15 hours ago, moomooland said:

Thanks for the advices everyone. 

He texted me today but want to do something on Sunday. We usually meet every Sunday but I told him if he's on call , I don't want to try to see him. He works in hospital, this is his first year of residency. I know his schedule are very busy. I guess I expected to get a response earlier than a week. 

 I haven't replied to him and not sure if I want to anymore. 

 

 

 

 

This isn't the same guy who you found out has been cheating on you, is it? That OP was also dating a doctor. 

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18 hours ago, moomooland said:

I'm not sure about that post, this is my first post. 

Sorry but we have to check because there are so many that will post about the same thing under a different account/name. The rules stipulate, no duplicate posting. We try and keep a watch on that. 

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