melancholy123 Posted May 30, 2021 Share Posted May 30, 2021 7 hours ago, bladeSoD9 said: Ok but i told him he could drop it off in my mailbox or on my door step he still hasn’t brought it It's a power trip! He's got something you want and he wants to you beg for it. Then he hopefully can get you in bed. Link to comment
catfeeder Posted May 31, 2021 Share Posted May 31, 2021 My locks would have been changed BEFORE the breakup, and I'd consider whether my stuff in his car is worth the price to avoid the headache of small claims court to retrieve them. 'Stuff' is easy enough to replace and well worth dropping in favor of peace of mind. There's no way that I'd be in any kind of contact with this guy. He sounds like a sleaze. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted May 31, 2021 Share Posted May 31, 2021 20 hours ago, Andrina said: If you can't get your stuff back and it's worth taking him to small claims court for, tell him that will happen if he doesn't give it back. Unfortunately when zero effort has been made to arrange an appropriate time for her to collect her things, there's no case. Legally it's her responsibility to get her belongings and change the locks. There's nothing stupider than asking someone to mail or leave a house key in a mailbox. He's right not to take her seriously or jump to her unreasonable demands that he's a delivery boy. Much clearer now why he dumped her if this type of victim mentality and princess attitude characterized the relationship. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted May 31, 2021 Share Posted May 31, 2021 20 hours ago, Andrina said: If you can't get your stuff back and it's worth taking him to small claims court for, tell him that will happen if he doesn't give it back. Unfortunately when zero effort has been made to arrange an appropriate time for her to collect her things, there's no case. Legally it's her responsibility to get her belongings and change the locks. There's nothing stupider than asking someone to mail or leave a house key in a mailbox. He's right not to take her seriously or jump to her unreasonable demands that he's a delivery boy. Much clearer now why he dumped her if this type of victim mentality and princess attitude characterized the relationship. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted May 31, 2021 Share Posted May 31, 2021 20 hours ago, Andrina said: . . Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted May 31, 2021 Share Posted May 31, 2021 10 hours ago, melancholy123 said: He's got something you want and he wants to you beg for it. Not really. It's unclear why he has her keys and stuff in the first place. Sounds like a sudden hostile breakup and this standoff of her wanting him to deliver it seems like part of this. Sounds like she's hoping he'll come back and using this as a game because if she needed/wanted her stuff she would go get it. Link to comment
bladeSoD9 Posted May 31, 2021 Author Share Posted May 31, 2021 1 hour ago, Wiseman2 said: Unfortunately when zero effort has been made to arrange an appropriate time for her to collect her things, there's no case. Legally it's her responsibility to get her belongings and change the locks. There's nothing stupider than asking someone to mail or leave a house key in a mailbox. He's right not to take her seriously or jump to her unreasonable demands that he's a delivery boy. Much clearer now why he dumped her if this type of victim mentality and princess attitude characterized the relationship. I dumped him Link to comment
bladeSoD9 Posted May 31, 2021 Author Share Posted May 31, 2021 I dumped him of i wanted him back i would’ve took his offer of sex up but i didn’t Link to comment
smackie9 Posted May 31, 2021 Share Posted May 31, 2021 Withholding personal items is so common during breakups. Link to comment
boltnrun Posted May 31, 2021 Share Posted May 31, 2021 What "things" does he have that you absolutely cannot live without? Your ID? Your credit/debit card? Your work ID? If it's a tube of lip balm and a water bottle, you can certainly replace those. Forget about trying to get them back. And you can change the locks. Yes, you can. Unless you'd rather continue this conflict. Link to comment
Tinydance Posted May 31, 2021 Share Posted May 31, 2021 Have you tried to call the police and get some advice? Link to comment
bladeSoD9 Posted May 31, 2021 Author Share Posted May 31, 2021 2 hours ago, smackie9 said: Withholding personal items is so common during breakups. I’ve only dealt with it once but he gave my things back this guy idk.. Link to comment
bladeSoD9 Posted May 31, 2021 Author Share Posted May 31, 2021 2 hours ago, Tinydance said: Have you tried to call the police and get some advice? No i haven’t Link to comment
smackie9 Posted May 31, 2021 Share Posted May 31, 2021 Is it like a TV and furniture? Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted May 31, 2021 Share Posted May 31, 2021 4 hours ago, smackie9 said: Withholding personal items is so common during breakups. They are not being withheld, she refuses to go get them Link to comment
bladeSoD9 Posted May 31, 2021 Author Share Posted May 31, 2021 11 minutes ago, smackie9 said: Is it like a TV and furniture? One is actually a binder with my school work and papers in the other things i can do without Link to comment
smackie9 Posted May 31, 2021 Share Posted May 31, 2021 Just go over there. You have a ginormous male friend to go with you? Link to comment
boltnrun Posted May 31, 2021 Share Posted May 31, 2021 1 hour ago, bladeSoD9 said: One is actually a binder with my school work and papers in the other things i can do without So send a schoolmate to pick up what you need and forget about the little trivial things you don't need. If he goes to your same school it will be even easier. Link to comment
catfeeder Posted June 1, 2021 Share Posted June 1, 2021 9 hours ago, bladeSoD9 said: One is actually a binder with my school work and papers in the other things i can do without Meet with your instructor to explain that your binder is lost, and ask what you can do to recoup the notes or make up the assignments. Lesson 1: Don't ever position yourself to be dependent on someone else's behavior in terms of your job or school or home. Lesson 2: Should you mess up step 1, address the problem directly with your job or school or locksmith, and eliminate the need to involve an ex in your important business. Especially this guy. Link to comment
Bothered2021 Posted June 6, 2021 Share Posted June 6, 2021 She didn’t refuse to go get her things. She said that she went there twice and he wasn’t there. She can’t just bust in and take her stuff. And she obviously can’t make arrangements if he wouldn’t respond to her when she asked after he asked for sex. Jesus people. Anyway, the best way is to call the police. Tell them you broke up, he agreed to drop your things off and didn’t. When you asked about them he stopped responding and wasn’t home when you tried to get them twice. Then they will make contact with him and hopefully you will get your stuff back. Even if you do, still change the locks. He could have made a spare. You never know And like others said, this is a power thing. You can be done with him, but you still “need” or want something from him, so the only way to keep you in his life is by keeping that so there’s a reason for contact. Or he’s just a jerk and won’t give you your things because you broke up with him. People do petty things when they get dumped lol Link to comment
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