What to do?

[Seraphim]

What I can do is off load my one set of sisters and just keep the other little kids I have can do it solo.

[Seraphim]

Well, I told her it would screw up her subsidy and she doesn’t care. Soooo, I guess that’s that.

[abitbroken]

She can't just make her own hours. I hope you are only paying her for the hours she is there. I can understand picking up a job after the day care is closed but this makes no sense. i will tell her that "i need you to be her during this time and this time. if you cannot be here, then i need to fill the time with someone else. Its nothing personal. I just need someone here in the morning when the kids come and i need someone more than just for lunch." The only reason to keep her is to keep your kid to adult ratio, but i would start putting my feelers out there for someone new, at least part time.

 

it would be a shame for you to have to "offload" kids.

[Seraphim]

She can't just make her own hours. I hope you are only paying her for the hours she is there. I can understand picking up a job after the day care is closed but this makes no sense. i will tell her that "i need you to be her during this time and this time. if you cannot be here, then i need to fill the time with someone else. Its nothing personal. I just need someone here in the morning when the kids come and i need someone more than just for lunch." The only reason to keep her is to keep your kid to adult ratio, but i would start putting my feelers out there for someone new, at least part time.

 

it would be a shame for you to have to "offload" kids.

It would. However, she basically told me everyone has to do what they have to do. Basically suck it up. She doesn’t want to listen to me that she’s screwing her self so whatever . And ruining a friendship too. But that seems to be besides the point to her .

 

Annnnnnnnd this is why I don’t love friends.

[Fudgie]

So are you going to find someone new and get rid of her?

[Seraphim]

I am not sure of my plan yet. I have to think.

[Seraphim]

I told her I didn’t want to lose a friend over it but what she did was not nice and I didn’t appreciate it. No notice is not appropriate. She will work the hours in between. My son will cover me in the daycare for the 5 minutes at the bus twice a day. I am still not happy but what can one do. It will take time before the resentment goes away.

 

My mom said to do things that are more equal. If we want to go do something tell her you’ll meet her there instead of picking her up etc.

[Cherylyn]

Generally, friendship or family and business / money do not mix.

 

You have to do what you need to do for your business.

[Seraphim]

Oh I know . I owned a business with my mom 35 years ago and I got shafted then too.

Generally, friendship or family and business / money do not mix.

 

You have to do what you need to do for your business.

[Seraphim]

Now just how it should be all business tomorrow not friend.

[tattoobunnie]

I have hired over 7 friends and about 5 family members, and all worked out without issues. Why? Because you hire them based on their abilities and how they embrace your corporate (business) culture.

 

I don't hire just any Tom,Di*k or harry. I have even turned down close friends of the family. And there's no hard feelings. She may be your friend, but if you don't replace her, you're just going to ruin the friendship regardless with resentment.

 

I would keep her on for now, while looking for a replacement at the same time. She did the same to you. What she did was behind your back. You are professional working woman who just started a business. Things like this should not go without penalty. Your business is on the line.

[luminousone]

I do think you might consider hiring someone new to either replace her or cover those odd hours.

 

Although you have called her your "business partner", she has shown you that she will put her wants and desires first instead of the business.

 

I am hoping she is not your legal business partner (i.e. she and you have not signed a legal business partnership agreement). That way you can easily extricate her from your business.

 

My ex and I have a legal business partnership agreement that has contingencies and stipulations for differing scenarios in case we don't agree on operations or decisions. And, more importantly, agreed upon terms if we ever need to dissolve the business.

 

We had our old family lawyer craft it, but then I had my own (a different lawyer) lawyer review it on my behalf.

 

Clear expectations make for a more successful partnership.

 

She has not taken this business seriously like you do.

 

Hopefully you will find an employee (not a friend) that is dependable and willing to put in the hours needed. You shouldn't have to turn away business just because she changed her hours without your say!

 

You don't have to be mean about it, and leave out any reference to how she hurt you as a friend (obviously you are more of a friend to her than she is to you, but this is about business). At the end of the day you are her employer, and you need to act as such (or you may leave yourself vulnetable to a lawsuit some day). You simply say that you are giving her 2 weeks notice, because for safety reasons you need someone for the full hours.

 

Or - you can hire someone to cover the hours she is missing. There may be. Enemies to that, as you have more people to cover when you need to be gone. But the drawback is that she is not predictable, so she may leave you in the lurch at any time.

 

I agree with your husband -at the very least she needs to be paid less because she is working fewer hours. Especially if you have to discontinue care for one of the families because of it.

[Seraphim]

No, she is not a legal partner. I am listed as the sole proprietor . I’m the one that has put every cent into the business .

 

We were friendly today but I’m going to keep in mind that she’s always going to put her self first .

[luminousone]

No, she is not a legal partner. I am listed as the sole proprietor . I’m the one that has put every cent into the business .

 

We were friendly today but I’m going to keep in mind that she’s always going to put her self first .

I am so glad for your sake that it was not a legal partnership.

 

Keeping friendly but professional may be helpful to you in the long run, bease thete may be times she can fill in for you . But you may choose to quietly hire one more "part - time" worker to get trained, who can ease into more hours as needed.

 

Also, it makes for a less stressful atmosphere for you.

 

And yes, now you know where her priorities are.

[shellyf62]

The other thing to consider is once you "accept" her working these new hours she will think she can get away with anything.

She is taking advantage of your friendship & nice nature.

Its ridiculous that she is telling you that she will be free all these hours in the future, when you need her now.

 

I would seriously consider hiring a new person. Start fresh with boundaries & rules in place.

[abitbroken]

I told her I didn’t want to lose a friend over it but what she did was not nice and I didn’t appreciate it. No notice is not appropriate. She will work the hours in between. My son will cover me in the daycare for the 5 minutes at the bus twice a day. I am still not happy but what can one do. It will take time before the resentment goes away.

 

My mom said to do things that are more equal. If we want to go do something tell her you’ll meet her there instead of picking her up etc.

 

Well, you don't actually "need" her while the kids are sleeping. I would hire someone else. Tell her if her other job is more important as it seems you will give her the rest of the weeks until school holiday break off so she can focus on that. Or tell her that her hours are covered and won't be neeidng her. Even if you were able to get someone 2-3 days a week and tell her she is not needed on those days. Or if you won't do that, I would stop carrying her taxes. I'd be so done with that.