reinventmyself Posted February 20, 2018 Share Posted February 20, 2018 But what his buddies wife says goes apparently so while everyone is enjoying them selves I get to stay at home alone literally all of our friends are at this party. If you told us what the original issue was - maybe we could advise you more Link to comment
Latinagirl Posted February 20, 2018 Author Share Posted February 20, 2018 Special birthday for a special friend we are able to have all of our friends out at this cabin I pulled from work connections so we thought make it a weekend and go big. But I'll be at home alone all of our friends are at this party Link to comment
thealchemist Posted February 20, 2018 Share Posted February 20, 2018 Well if my wife was uninvited to a party I was going to I would tell the hosts to go F themselves. I would not be a pawn in an act to try to make my wife unhappy. If your bf sees no issues in going when you are being singled out in an act of maliciousness and told you are no longer invited then I don't think he should be your boyfriend anymore. That being said... Requiring that you and your bf go to all social functions together sounds like a very weird rule bred from insecurity. It also sounds unhealthy. Also, it seems like there is more here than is evident. Link to comment
MissCanuck Posted February 20, 2018 Share Posted February 20, 2018 I don't have any idea why you fronted so much money for this, OP. That is ridiculous. Your boyfriend and this guy's other friends, sure. But what the heck were you thinking, girl? And why is this one particular wife calling all the shots while you put up nearly half the money? I have a feeling it's not only her that doesn't want you there, if you get what I'm saying. Something is very, very suspicious about this entire situation. I would also be breaking up with my boyfriend for not having the courage to stand up to such a disrespectful woman on my behalf. Also, it's unrealistic to expect your boyfriend and join you at all social events and vice versa. On this occasion, yes, you're darn right I'd back out if someone had the stones to dis-invite my partner like this. But in general, that's not a sustainable pact. Link to comment
Latinagirl Posted February 20, 2018 Author Share Posted February 20, 2018 They are friends of my BF and I. Special birthday because we are able to have all of our friends there. We also thought that our buddies wife got over her little beef I guess not and i get to pay for it literally. Link to comment
Capricorn3 Posted February 20, 2018 Share Posted February 20, 2018 It's a big birthday party we are doing for my BF buddy that I've put a a good 40% of the money in my BF has put in 40% What I don't understand is this: It seems you and your boyfriend are hosting the party for his friend. You are paying for the bulk of the expenses and by that alone, you have more than enough right to attend the party. I honestly don't see how the wife can simply "ban" you from attending the party which YOU (and your boyfriend) are hosting and paying for. Just go to the party, or cancel the whole thing. Link to comment
Latinagirl Posted February 20, 2018 Author Share Posted February 20, 2018 We go to all rememberable functions together we have our separate times and hobbies but rememberable events we go together. Link to comment
Latinagirl Posted February 20, 2018 Author Share Posted February 20, 2018 Our Pac is on rememberable events not the dinky ones. Link to comment
DancingFool Posted February 20, 2018 Share Posted February 20, 2018 What I don't understand is this: It seems you and your boyfriend are hosting the party for his friend. You are paying for the bulk of the expenses and by that alone, you have more than enough right to attend the party. I honestly don't see how the wife can simply "ban" you from attending the party which YOU (and your boyfriend) are hosting and paying for. Just go to the party, or cancel the whole thing. ^This. How can you be uninvited from a party YOU are hosting? This makes zero sense to me. You and your bf are really the only two people calling the shots here since you are the hosts and without you there would be no party to begin with. Link to comment
Latinagirl Posted February 20, 2018 Author Share Posted February 20, 2018 I cancel it I'm the bad guy I go I'm the one that will start an unnecessary fight. Link to comment
MissCanuck Posted February 20, 2018 Share Posted February 20, 2018 I cancel it I'm the bad guy I go I'm the one that will start an unnecessary fight. OP, can you please answer this: Why does this woman have any say at all over who attends this party? Link to comment
Capricorn3 Posted February 20, 2018 Share Posted February 20, 2018 We also thought that our buddies wife got over her little beef I guess not ^ Here we go. Tell us about the beef because clearly, THIS is what it's all about. Link to comment
DancingFool Posted February 20, 2018 Share Posted February 20, 2018 I'll also add in that since you and your bf are hosting the party, it now makes sense why he has to go even if you aren't. Puts things in a different perspective with added details. If you being there is going to cause a fight....I mean please elaborate on that and perhaps we can help sort this out or give you some advice on how not to get into a fight, because really....you are the hostess of this party. There is also a big difference between being uninvited from a party you are hosting and choosing to bow out because this woman has an issue with you. If you choose to bow out, that's fine. Your bf is still obligated to go since he is the sole host without you. Both of you can't bow out since you are the hosts. Link to comment
yatsue Posted February 20, 2018 Share Posted February 20, 2018 ^ Here we go. Tell us about the beef because clearly, THIS is what it's all about. She stated before the beef was this wife didn't want her coming because she was too cute/hot and didn't want her there. Ridiculous. Now that I'm seeing you are paying for 40% of the party, including the other 40% paid by your bf, WHAT IS STOPPING YOU FROM GOING?????? You said you are throwing this for YOUR friend, YOUR friends will be there, and WHY does this random wife (of the friend you're hosting for?) have ANY say if you going or not?!?!?! YOU AND YOUR BF ARE THE HOSTS NOT HER!!!! Of course you can go! Or if the wife continues to be a stank, then call the venue and take back your money And gosh dang it, if you cannot go or cannot back out of the money, have your bf pay the 1k. He doesn't see your side?! Then make him feel it by forking out your large share! Darn it, I feel mad for you girl. Link to comment
reinventmyself Posted February 20, 2018 Share Posted February 20, 2018 Good points. If you and your BF are indeed the hosts and sponsoring this - if the wife has a problem, it's up to her if she wants to attend or stay home. But I think it's the wife of the guest of honor though. Hard to say. I am still dying to know what ticked off the wife. Call me curious :) My sons last gf wasn't invited to her own sisters wedding because `she was too pretty and would steal the attention from the sister bride' *cough* At least that's the story my son bought. 3 years and a lot of drama later, I could pretty much figure out why she wasn't welcome - and it wasn't because of her looks :) Link to comment
Latinagirl Posted February 20, 2018 Author Share Posted February 20, 2018 No I've always been nice invited her over for bbq nights my BF and I throw, invited her out for drinks I don't get it. I'm a social person and I know I can't even talk to this buddy when his wife is around when she's not we all have a great time she shows up and it's I have to go or they leave so usually my BF and I jet off. Link to comment
Latinagirl Posted February 20, 2018 Author Share Posted February 20, 2018 You used the wrong section of my message we made a pact for special events not just any old social event. Link to comment
Latinagirl Posted February 20, 2018 Author Share Posted February 20, 2018 Because she disturbs a good time so to try and keep her down her hubby aka our budy who getting the wonderful birthday party bends to everything she says. Link to comment
Latinagirl Posted February 20, 2018 Author Share Posted February 20, 2018 That I'm more attractive then her she litteraly said that's her problem. I have a boyfriend that I love deeply that it just hit me the issue we're having is her not anyone else. Am I right Link to comment
reinventmyself Posted February 20, 2018 Share Posted February 20, 2018 Because she disturbs a good time so to try and keep her down her hubby aka our budy who getting the wonderful birthday party bends to everything she says. That's it?. . .she doesn't care for you because - she disturbs a good time? Link to comment
Latinagirl Posted February 20, 2018 Author Share Posted February 20, 2018 No unfortunately the cabin is already booked for the weekend I pulled work strings and got a wicked price. I always have a spine and never let someone push me around like this just unfortunately this is a really close friend of mine and my BF. It's hard and fustersting and I'm litteraly stuck and don't know what to do litteraly I pull the plug I'm forever the that ruined what could of been am awesome party. Link to comment
yatsue Posted February 20, 2018 Share Posted February 20, 2018 You used the wrong section of my message we made a pact for special events not just any old social event. Sorry, the posters mean it's restricting towards any event, even special ones. I do still believe the pact should be dissolved, even for special/big events because it is not healthy. BUT, I completely get your situation here. This is not fair to you; you are the host - you put in time, effort and a load of money into this. How about you just go anyway? If the wife wants to cause drama, let her blow steam and just have fun. Or take my other suggestion and have your bf pay you back the 1k for your portion. How does he not see you forking out a lot of money for an event you planned on attending and then not being allowed to go is awful treatment? Is he that dense? Link to comment
reinventmyself Posted February 20, 2018 Share Posted February 20, 2018 That I'm more attractive then her she litteraly said that's her problem. Am I right Who exactly told you this? Your boyfriend? Link to comment
Latinagirl Posted February 20, 2018 Author Share Posted February 20, 2018 It's litteraly she said to me because my BF and I sat down with them to ask she said I don't like you because your prettier than me Link to comment
reinventmyself Posted February 20, 2018 Share Posted February 20, 2018 It's litteraly she said to me because my BF and I sat down with them to ask she said I don't like you because your prettier than me It that's the case, I would tell her to `deal with it' and put my party shoes on. There doesn't have to be any drama if you avoid her and take the high road. Dealing with your boyfriend rolling over on this at your expense is another issue. But I think that was original question. Link to comment
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