Seraphim Posted November 1, 2017 Share Posted November 1, 2017 People are acting like the only exchange is monetary. And the only worth a human has is monetary. I know when I married it was for richer or poorer in SICKNESS and in health . Nowhere in there was mention of bank balance . Sick people have lots of worth . My husband makes seven times what I do . I have several chronic illnesses but he still considers me of great worth . I have lots to offer . And I’m sure the OP does as well . Link to comment
Batya33 Posted November 1, 2017 Share Posted November 1, 2017 People are acting like the only exchange is monetary. And the only worth a human has is monetary. I know when I married it was for richer or poorer in SICKNESS and in health . Nowhere in there was mention of bank balance . Sick people have lots of worth . My husband makes seven times what I do . I have several chronic illnesses but he still considers me of great worth . I have lots to offer . And I’m sure the OP does as well . But she is talking about meeting someone new who is going to get involved with her where she expects him to live with her and her father who she is a 24/7 caretaker for and financially provide for her health condition and know that she cannot work. That's not just about money -that's about a specific way of living, about sharing space with an inlaw (or future inlaw) who is ill and requires constant care, about the stress of being the sole provider, etc. It's not just about money. But the OP has focused on the financial role that person would play in her life even before she knows who he is. So to her money does play a big part in a potential relationship. Obviously she can bring lots to the table - she is a person with many qualities of course that others might find attractive or compelling, or awesome. But she introduced the financial expectations of a potential union with someone else. And her expectations that her father would live with them. Of course if she was already married it would be different -that is a for better or worse scenario. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted November 1, 2017 Share Posted November 1, 2017 There still the suggestion though unless you’re bringing lots of money to the table nobody wants or needs you . And unless you’re fancy free nobody needs you . It’s an ugly world isn’t it? Link to comment
mustlovedogs Posted November 1, 2017 Share Posted November 1, 2017 There still the suggestion though unless you’re bringing lots of money to the table nobody wants or needs you . And unless you’re fancy free nobody needs you . It’s an ugly world isn’t it? No, that's not at all what I'm saying. She wants his money. That is clear. What does she offer in exchange? She's asking a lot of any potential partner. Link to comment
Starlight925 Posted November 1, 2017 Share Posted November 1, 2017 No, that's not at all what I'm saying. She wants his money. That is clear. What does she offer in exchange? She's asking a lot of any potential partner. Exactly. She believes that it's a man's duty to financially provide for his woman. What's her duty then? Provide love, support, sex? She's too busy with her father and her illness to provide much of anything. She wants to take. What does she have to give? Link to comment
Seraphim Posted November 1, 2017 Share Posted November 1, 2017 Like I said it is an ugly world where if you are ill you are worthless. Link to comment
Starlight925 Posted November 1, 2017 Share Posted November 1, 2017 She's not worthless. No one said that. She hasn't brought up one thing she can offer but she keeps saying she wants a man's money. To me, THAT'S ugly. Link to comment
Sweet Sue Posted November 1, 2017 Author Share Posted November 1, 2017 Thank you Seraphim for your kind words. It's funny that whenever I share my story with someone and find myself saying..." I bring nothing to the relationship...", I find that my friends are offended by that comment (unlike most on this thread here). They remind me that I may not bring money to the relationship, but I bring my love, nurturing, compassion, my undying love and commitment to that person and I am one hell of a cook! Link to comment
Seraphim Posted November 1, 2017 Share Posted November 1, 2017 Thank you Seraphim for your kind words. It's funny that whenever I share my story with someone and find myself saying..." I bring nothing to the relationship...", I find that my friends are offended by that comment (unlike most on this thread here). They remind me that I may not bring money to the relationship, but I bring my love, nurturing, compassion, my undying love and commitment to that person and I am one hell of a cook! Well you know those things are worth less than money . Link to comment
Sweet Sue Posted November 1, 2017 Author Share Posted November 1, 2017 LHGirl.........I want to be in a loving nurturing relationship. I never said I want a man's money. I said I am looking for a man to be a good provider. There is nothing wrong with that. In fact, men are taught as boys to grow up and educate themselves so that they can provide for their families. I would never marry a man I didn't love. I would rather stay single. What can I offer a man? Read my reply to Seraphim and I suggest we close this thread. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted November 1, 2017 Share Posted November 1, 2017 Sweet Sue you can ask a moderator to close a thread if that’s what you’d like . Link to comment
Sweet Sue Posted November 1, 2017 Author Share Posted November 1, 2017 Batya33........NO, MY DAD would live with us if our home if he was able to. I am looking several years down the road. And most likely by that time, as my condition improves and I get stronger, I will be able to do so much more than I can do now....such as resume working, traveling, volunteering etc......my basic question is: when do I tell any guy that I am interested in pursuing a relationship, about my health issues...the first date, second date, one month...... I don't how all of this turned into "she's wants a man's money". For pete's sake ladies, get real! Most of you are probably blessed with good health (good enough to hold down a job, or have a nice pension plan and not having to be a full time care giver......if you are, then thank the Lord above you have it so good. I don't have what you have, at least not right now, but having said that, I still can bring alot to a relationship even though I am sick. Do you think housewives have no value? I was one for 17 years. And my husband provided a very good living and he paid my medical bills, dental bills, groceries, rent, phone, water, vet bills and much more........and I ensured that he was served a hot meal every night, his clothes were washed and ironed, lawn was cut, dishes were washed, dusted and vacuumed, walked the floor all night with a sick child, took care of him when he was sick, sometimes very sick, and much more.........does that make me less than?? Does that make me less of a person? Link to comment
Sweet Sue Posted November 1, 2017 Author Share Posted November 1, 2017 Thank you Seraphim again for your kindness. I appreciate the support you have shown to me. May God Bless you and I will keep you in my prayers. How do I do that, please? Link to comment
pippy longstocking Posted November 1, 2017 Share Posted November 1, 2017 Thank you Seraphim again for your kindness. I appreciate the support you have shown to me. May God Bless you and I will keep you in my prayers. How do I do that, please? I will write to admin for you sue xxx While this is still open though , don't you lose heart , you are a wonderful kind lady and looking after your dad ..makes you pretty special you know that x I wish you so much happiness and hope you find a lovely man to enjoy life with , I wake up every single day in either physical or mental pain , so I have been following your thread , really cheered me up ...NOT . God bless you sue xxxxx Link to comment
pippy longstocking Posted November 1, 2017 Share Posted November 1, 2017 Sue I have asked for this to be closed , but no one is usually here until the UK afternoon x Link to comment
SherrySher Posted November 1, 2017 Share Posted November 1, 2017 I second, Pippy. Keep your head up darling, a chronic illness is tough. x Stay strong. Link to comment
kamurj Posted November 1, 2017 Share Posted November 1, 2017 Thread closed by OP request. Link to comment
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