IAmFCA Posted February 2, 2017 Share Posted February 2, 2017 I have been withholding this but I just have to get it out. I do not want to be sensationalist nor dramatic. What does the fb friend have to gain from this act of kindness (my foot) of introducing the OP to the cancer man? I doubt I am the only one who sees the potential for cash to leave cancer man's hands to middleman's hands in exchange for delivery, in essence, of a woman to become cancer man's companion. Is consistent with cancer man's instincts to pay the woman as well, as he knows an emotional commitment isn't logical or reliable, but a transactional commitment is one upon which he can depend. OP, please please please disassociate yourself. Link to comment
RainyCoast Posted February 2, 2017 Share Posted February 2, 2017 I have been withholding this but I just have to get it out. I do not want to be sensationalist nor dramatic. What does the fb friend have to gain from this act of kindness (my foot) of introducing the OP to the cancer man? I doubt I am the only one who sees the potential for cash to leave cancer man's hands to middleman's hands in exchange for delivery, in essence, of a woman to become cancer man's companion. Is consistent with cancer man's instincts to pay the woman as well, as he knows an emotional commitment isn't logical or reliable, but a transactional commitment is one upon which he can depend. OP, please please please disassociate yourself. it isn't impossible. in any event, it sounds like a scheme and a trap. no way anyone infiltrates themselves so quickly and profusely into the privacy of an all-accepting empath without having their own needs in mind. if the needs were fair, they would be having them met the conventional way, getting to know people, reciprocating, respecting boundaries. she was picked for excessively meeting others needs. i can't imagine anyone else wanting to basically sacrifice themselves for a man they barely just met. there is also a hole in the cancer patient's story. he said he came to the US through medical tourism or something like that and she did a background check and it doesn't add up. it's in her last thread. i am not familiar with the system so i can't decipher what's going on but it isn't good. facebook strangers with dramatic stories which require you to marry them to solve their horrible problem. the woman too, she wanted to marry Cool's brother, and the man messaged her just after (coincidence? and the woman badmouthed him-- because he was competing for OPs resources with her?) and hooked her up with the ailing one. A sick twist on Nigerian brides it sounds like to me. Link to comment
coolgirl Posted February 2, 2017 Author Share Posted February 2, 2017 He has no one here other than the friend that introduced us. His family lives back home. Which they are sending him money to get the surgery he needs here. There not wealthy yes i have done my research. Hes only here for 5 years. Why, he came here with no knowledge of what he's getting himself involved with as far as not being able to speak English I will never understand why. I told him welcome to America because nothing is easy here. I never wanted to be too involved in his life. I was failed given information about this man by his friend. He DID NOT disclose that. Yall are right I don't know him and everything did start out fast. My aunt passed away 3 months ago due to cancer and her passing hasn't hit me yet. My grandmother passed away 8 years ago to cancer and that hasn't hit me yet. And now I have a friend that's battling cancer that I'm seeing with my own eyes that he's struggling now it feels real to me. I guess it has hit me hard. In no shape of form I want to attach myself to this man because I don't know where he stands at the moment. But I will be here for him as a person to help him and give him the support he needs. I thought I was just trying to help another human being by giving moral support and I will. His friend knew about this I wasn't given the information. But he did it anyway. He himself knew he was sick but got involved anyway. I will be there as a friend for him no matter what. Because friends don't just walk away from each other. If one of your friends were going through this I'm definitely sure and positive that you wouldn't pick up and leave just like that. Thank you to everyone who has responded Link to comment
coolgirl Posted February 2, 2017 Author Share Posted February 2, 2017 I have known him for 3 months. cool, you probably answered this before, my eyes are not okay right now and i can't go back to read too much text efficiently atm so sorry if i'm repeating- how long have have you known the friend who introduced you? Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted February 2, 2017 Share Posted February 2, 2017 it isn't impossible. in any event, it sounds like a scheme and a trap. no way anyone infiltrates themselves so quickly and profusely into the privacy of an all-accepting empath without having their own needs in mind. if the needs were fair, they would be having them met the conventional way, getting to know people, reciprocating, respecting boundaries. she was picked for excessively meeting others needs. i can't imagine anyone else wanting to basically sacrifice themselves for a man they barely just met. there is also a hole in the cancer patient's story. he said he came to the US through medical tourism or something like that and she did a background check and it doesn't add up. it's in her last thread. i am not familiar with the system so i can't decipher what's going on but it isn't good. facebook strangers with dramatic stories which require you to marry them to solve their horrible problem. the woman too, she wanted to marry Cool's brother, and the man messaged her just after (coincidence? and the woman badmouthed him-- because he was competing for OPs resources with her?) and hooked her up with the ailing one. A sick twist on Nigerian brides it sounds like to me. I agree wholeheartedly. I have a RUN alarm happening. Link to comment
coolgirl Posted February 2, 2017 Author Share Posted February 2, 2017 I think you misunderstood the situation with the women. She wanted to introduce me to her brother. I said no. I'm not that stupid either to fall for it because when it comes too people from middle east there looking for one thing only to find someone to use to come here get there citizenship or green card and take off. It happened to my best friend a girl. She was married to her husband for 4 years got his citizenship and took off. I may be naive but not stupid to fall for this too. Even that would had been the case with him too. Not in a million years I put myself in that self-destruction. it isn't impossible. in any event, it sounds like a scheme and a trap. no way anyone infiltrates themselves so quickly and profusely into the privacy of an all-accepting empath without having their own needs in mind. if the needs were fair, they would be having them met the conventional way, getting to know people, reciprocating, respecting boundaries. she was picked for excessively meeting others needs. i can't imagine anyone else wanting to basically sacrifice themselves for a man they barely just met. there is also a hole in the cancer patient's story. he said he came to the US through medical tourism or something like that and she did a background check and it doesn't add up. it's in her last thread. i am not familiar with the system so i can't decipher what's going on but it isn't good. facebook strangers with dramatic stories which require you to marry them to solve their horrible problem. the woman too, she wanted to marry Cool's brother, and the man messaged her just after (coincidence? and the woman badmouthed him-- because he was competing for OPs resources with her?) and hooked her up with the ailing one. A sick twist on Nigerian brides it sounds like to me. Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted February 2, 2017 Share Posted February 2, 2017 I have known him for 3 months. OP to reinforce we are not alone I was fished for about two years, with my own participation because I thought we were friends. He used many tactics to manipulate - incredible levels of emotion and fiction. Threatened suicide. Lung cancer. Love and devotion, always, but staying friends given my disinterest. I met "family" -- they weren't in on it, but had learned to tolerate that he had adopted them as part of his reality. Therapists. Lawyers. Eventually he died, or didn't. The hospital called me and I called them back so it seemed legit but who knows - they asked me to cover his expenses. The whole thing was very weird. So, yes, it happens. Link to comment
coolgirl Posted February 2, 2017 Author Share Posted February 2, 2017 Please check your inbox OP to reinforce we are not alone I was fished for about two years, with my own participation because I thought we were friends. He used many tactics to manipulate - incredible levels of emotion and fiction. Threatened suicide. Lung cancer. Love and devotion, always, but staying friends given my disinterest. I met "family" -- they weren't in on it, but had learned to tolerate that he had adopted them as part of his reality. Therapists. Lawyers. Eventually he died, or didn't. The hospital called me and I called them back so it seemed legit but who knows - they asked me to cover his expenses. The whole thing was very weird. So, yes, it happens. Link to comment
faraday Posted February 2, 2017 Share Posted February 2, 2017 Please check your inbox You sent me a pm, and then didn't like my response so you didn't message me back Link to comment
coolgirl Posted February 2, 2017 Author Share Posted February 2, 2017 Faraday, check your inbox. You sent me a pm, and then didn't like my response so you didn't message me back Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted February 3, 2017 Share Posted February 3, 2017 Coolgirl the private information doesn't change the answer. 1. Break all ties with these people. 2. Ask yourself, why are you fighting so hard to hang on? Link to comment
Hollyj Posted February 5, 2017 Share Posted February 5, 2017 Why are you making friends with all of these strangers on FB? Link to comment
Chocolate25 Posted February 8, 2017 Share Posted February 8, 2017 Enjoy him while you can. 😊He's only got one life to live. Link to comment
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