Opening up to BDSM

[ClaireDarling]

For those of you who are kink friendly, how would you open your SO or FWB up to the idea of they're already slightly interested, but never actually done any of it?

 

My friend (soon to possibly be boyfriend) is interested in it, but he lacks experience. I have experience, but I don't really know how to teach. I mean, I can explain what I like and show what I like, but once you get in the moment, it's kind of hard to stop and say, "Oh, let's do it this way."

 

I figured we could probably incorporate toys that are specifically used for this, that way we can start slow and work our way up to the level that I think we both have in mind.

 

What would you all suggest?

[Matt3939]

Im not into BDSM but why not just bring it up? I know you say it's hard but it really isn't. Specially coming from a woman. Unless it's something way off the wall I'm sure most men would go for certain things. Good luck

[jbwhite83]

Okay I have to ask what is it

[pippy longstocking]

Oh I just plough on in ..here's the ropes , now tie me up , call me a sl** and give me a little slap here and there ...job done

[Hermes]

Heh heh Pippy.

 

"Tie me up; tie me down".

[pippy longstocking]

Heh heh Pippy.

 

"Tie me up; tie me down".

 

hahahahahah oh darling ...I am chuckling

[Wiseman2]

Watch some BDSM porn together, see how he responds.

My friend (soon to possibly be boyfriend) is interested in it, but he lacks experience. I have experience, but I don't really know how to teach.

[Hermes]

Yep. It was a movie...."tie me up; tie me down".

[rosephase]

You could always go with him to a bdsm club. It might be helpful to have someone other than yourself teach him. If you are a sub/bottom/slave it can be hard to teach from the bottom and is kinda counterintuitive. But if you go to a place that has classes and/or experienced tops you both could learn together.

[agent1607307371]

SM101 by Jay Wiseman. Has lots of introductory level information for people who are dipping a toe in.

 

That said, really the only way for him to learn what you want is for you to teach him. He can't learn that from someone else. You need to sit down and talk it through without it being in the middle of a session.

[Jeffbobo]

I had recently dated a woman who was into BDSM and the kink community. I told her that it really wasn't my thing and had no interest at all to get involved, though I *did* like the "costumes" she'd wear. Lol. 😊 I did however find it really interesting listening to stories and what it was all about.

 

She talked about kink parties that she would go to and what was involved. Perhaps you could bring your friend/bf to such a party.

[ThatwasThen]

Have you watched 50 Shades of Grey?

 

I think a simple google to "BDSM sites and info" should get you the information you're looking for. "The Cage" even has a forum.