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Jeffbobo

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  • Birthday 04/04/1969

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  1. Sorry to hear you're going through this. I've been through it and it's tough. I'd second abitbroken's advice and seek out an attorney immediately. With respect to finances, the home was a pre-marital asset but contributions toward the mortgage and appreciation of the asset would be fair game. Spousal maintenance *could* be on the table, perhaps even temporary, to help her get back on her feet. If it is then consider a up front lump sum as opposed to paying out over a certain period of time. I say this because it will help you sever ties more completely and help you move on quicker. Discuss these points with an attorney and take the initiative on filing.
  2. As a guy, I have done this a few times. It was usually because there was something that I really liked about them and I missed. The problem was that I focused solely on what I missed about them and not the negative aspects which were why I broke up in the first place. In each case, the negative things came back to the forefront, I broke it off and she was hurt. Again... In hindsight it was so selfish on my part. This is why I never go back.
  3. There are many people who meet when they’re young, fall head over heels in love and are supposed soulmates but yet 25 years down the road it falls apart and ends in divorce. Perhaps in your circumstance, he was and/or is in love with you but you never have been truly with him. My point is, at least the aforementioned people *have* had that experience where that feeling has been reciprocated. The decent thing to do would be to end it so that he may potentially find that at some point.
  4. My first thought is, screw texting and actually call her and confirm the details. That way there’s no “getting lost in text translation” BS.
  5. The way that I see this is that the two of you were not exclusive and had only been on a couple of dates when this happened. Personally, I don't see any issue with dating multiple people but the line for me is when I start becoming intimate with someone. Perhaps that's why she cut communication off from you to focus on the other guy. Then realized that she was more interested in you, cut him off and pursued you. That's good. You've been together 10 months, she's with you now and the two of you are exclusive, is this not the case?
  6. Please read word per word very carefully what lost has written. Then read it again three more times so that it sinks in. I wish I would have had this wisdom when I got divorced over seven years ago but I guess I like doing things the hard way. If you’d like advice on what NOT to do based on my own experience, then I have a wealth of that advice. Please step back, take a few deep breaths, listen and focus.
  7. I think your friends are blind and are thinking with their little heads. By even asking and contemplating, I get the feeling that you are captivated by her and think you can look past the red flags and potentially rescue her from her situation.
  8. Hey Lost! Great to see you getting back in the game. A lot of great advice from the ladies. Now go get ‘em Tiger! 😄
  9. I agree wholeheartedly with Jibralta and others but my line of thought is that there will be a time for that sentiment further down the road when you’re past the hurt of a breakup, you don’t have thoughts of wanting them back and wondering/hoping on breadcrumbs. When you *can* look back on those good memories and actually feel good about them, not hurt or wondering if they want you back by, as in this case, leaving pictures up on social media..
  10. You’re going to drive yourself crazy and impede your ability to move on if you continue to troll her social media. You’ve deleted photos of the two of you from social media but take the next step with no contact and just block yourself from seeing her on social media. Out of site, out of mind.
  11. This ^^^ is exactly my thought after reading this situation.
  12. This is why you block his number and any other means of communication. Erase everything, like previous texts that you're tempted to look at after blocking him.
  13. Personally, my response would have been, "I wish you the best in life, good luck!" and then close the door and move forward. My response wouldn't be an attempt to make an impact or get a response. You deserve better than someone who plays these BS games with you. Don't settle for scraps.
  14. My thought is coming from the perspective of me never thinking of getting involved with someone romantically at work. I guess I would do this with someone new because I know it can be hard for someone just starting at a new place. I'd like to make them feel welcome and part of the team.
  15. Please don't feed into this. This is just his way of taking the guilt off of him and placing it on you. It's nothing more than easing his own guilt. Selfish...
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