Really need some support

[miss_sunshine86]

Hi

I went to my friends wedding today. And when i was there i realised i am at a cross road and i felt so emotional. If i continue as i am, being with this guy who is with me for a few months (was 7 months), then disappears for almost a year, comes back for another few months.... (this has happened 3 times), i realised, i will never have this day. And i honestly feel like i may never have this day because i dont know if i will ever get past this person. But i really want to because its always been what i wanted, a marriage, kids, etc. I feel like i may never because of him. For those of you who dont know my story, he has been in my life for 6 years, we have been together 3 times. The last time we were together for 7 months, i really believed he'd changed, even my family did. But then he disappeared 3 weeks ago and there wasn't even a fight - a moody conversation ,yes, but we'd agreed to see eachother the next day. And then he ignored me for the last 3 weeks, i stopped trying to speak to him after 2. i looked on his facebook and he wrote he is probably moving 300 miles away to his friend. So he is breaking up with me by disappearing, then potentially moving away, all whilst having never even ended things with me. given that i felt he had really changed this just feels like a bad dream/nightmare i can't wake up from. I really need some support. Thanks

[TiredOfGames]

Breaking from this relationship is not going to be easy for you, but I think you know that. I have not yet had a chance to read any other posts you may have made but already this sounds like a terrible relationship for you to be in, and to have been in for so long. You are still young and have plenty of time to find the right person, that person who will treat you the way you expect and should be treated. If you want marriage and children in your future, it will happen, just not with this person that you've been somewhat stuck with on and off for the past 6 years. That is no way to treat anybody, and this third time should be the catalyst for you to not speak with him again. To just take off like that is a terrible way to end things on a semi-permanent basis for him, yet keeping you on the hook for when he decides to return. You need to decide now for yourself to leave him and that relationship. It will be hard for sure, but no harder than what he is and has already seemingly put you through. But you'll be thanking yourself down the line when you've begun to heal, when you heal fully, and when you are ready for the right person that deserves you.

 

ToG

[Hollyj]

You're right! You will not get over him, as long as you keep taking him back. It's really sleazy the way he handles thing, I can't imagine finding this out by FB.

 

This guy has repeatedly demonstrated that he is incapable of a healthy relationship or commitment. It time to move on! People do not change!

 

I suggest you get some counseling, you need to understand why you continue to return to someone who is a continuous disappointment.

[diamond78]

Hey lady,

 

You know it's good you are thinking these thoughts and realizing that you want marriage, family, and kids and are realizing that you won't get those things with someone who keeps disappearing from your life. You may not see it now, but one day you will move on from this guy and meet someone who can treat you a whole lot better.

 

You have a lot of life ahead of you...This too shall pass.

 

Be strong and you will get through this for the better!

[Daisy88]

I'm really sorry to hear that you're having to go through this. I think you having to find out on FB that he is probably moving far away without even "officially" breaking up with you first is a very cowardly thing for him to do.

[miss_sunshine86]

I decided that today is the first day I emotionally cut him out of my life. I will honestly never contact him again and I will start my journey today.

[italiannmf24]

I decided that today is the first day I emotionally cut him out of my life. I will honestly never contact him again and I will start my journey today.

 

Sounds like a good decision. Ending the cycle is your best option right now.

[imonlyhuman]

Wow, you're still so young. You will have that day. I'm almost 30, and only now are so many of my friends getting married. You've got all the time in the world.