abitbroken Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 I think that if you really want marriage, don't ask him to live with you. If my boyfriend, after we know we both want marriage and not to live together first (unless it was just before the wedding our stuff was all together for convenience), asked me to move in with him, I would feel it was a sign that he changed his mind about marriage. I think that asking him to live with you is a whole different proposition or subject. I think that you chickened out a little. Instead of using moving in as a litmus test, as you really in your heart of hearts want to be married, not "just living together," you should talk about marriage. Right now, although I would love to marry my boyfriend, I would turn him down on living together as we have a greater goal and the same goal of marriage. Link to comment
RitaTrue Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 I think that if you really want marriage, don't ask him to live with you. If my boyfriend, after we know we both want marriage and not to live together first (unless it was just before the wedding our stuff was all together for convenience), asked me to move in with him, I would feel it was a sign that he changed his mind about marriage. I think that asking him to live with you is a whole different proposition or subject. I think that you chickened out a little. Instead of using moving in as a litmus test, as you really in your heart of hearts want to be married, not "just living together," you should talk about marriage. Right now, although I would love to marry my boyfriend, I would turn him down on living together as we have a greater goal and the same goal of marriage. well said here. Link to comment
Honey1 Posted March 26, 2012 Author Share Posted March 26, 2012 What were his reasons or excuses for not moving in with you? What are you reasons for waiting at this point? What is going to happen over the next 6 months that will change things? I don't think you have anything to lose at this point if you ended it with him. It could go 2 ways, he would decide to marry you or he would let you go which means he never was going to marry you anyway. You really can't lose here other than dealing with a broken heart for awhile. Really isn't it better to know now than much later? His reasons- he wouldn't be comfortable moving into MY place. He has a few finances he wants to take care of before he takes that step. My reasons for waiting- I really want to be with him so I'm trying to be patient. Over the next 6 months- September.....who knows but if we haven't made any progress and he's still giving me excuses.....I can't anymore.....I'll walk. You're right, at this point, I don't have much to lose. Link to comment
Honey1 Posted March 26, 2012 Author Share Posted March 26, 2012 I think that if you really want marriage, don't ask him to live with you. I think that you chickened out a little. Well what's done is done, I can't un-ask him. I didn't chicken out, I would never propose marriage to him so I wasn't straying from my plan or anything. Link to comment
Batya33 Posted March 27, 2012 Share Posted March 27, 2012 Well what's done is done, I can't un-ask him. I didn't chicken out, I would never propose marriage to him so I wasn't straying from my plan or anything. You won't ask him to marry you but you'll ask him to live with you knowing that he knows you want marriage and that's why you're asking? I don't really see the difference. Link to comment
Honey1 Posted January 21, 2013 Author Share Posted January 21, 2013 Good afternoon ENA!! Just an update to this 4 year relationship.....he proposed on NYE!! We're due to get married next year!! He's supposed to move in sometime mid year. I couldn't be happier!! Link to comment
Huntress0527 Posted January 21, 2013 Share Posted January 21, 2013 Glad to see everything worked out! Link to comment
lady00 Posted January 21, 2013 Share Posted January 21, 2013 Good afternoon ENA!! Just an update to this 4 year relationship.....he proposed on NYE!! We're due to get married next year!! He's supposed to move in sometime mid year. I couldn't be happier!! Congrats. Thanks for updating ENA! Link to comment
Ms Darcy Posted January 21, 2013 Share Posted January 21, 2013 Yayy ... super happy for you! How did it all happen? Link to comment
Snny Posted January 22, 2013 Share Posted January 22, 2013 See... wasn't the wait worth it? Congrats Link to comment
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