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camus154 last won the day on February 7 2013

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About camus154

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  1. This. x1000. It's understandable for people to feel low when unemployed. I've been there. But that's not an excuse for a pity party, which is exactly what he's courting. If your boyfriend feels so low about his station in life, then the question is: what does he want to do about that and what's his plan? And to answer the question raised in the title of this post, you don't. In a healthy relationship, one is not responsible for creating or elevating one's partner's sense of self-worth. That's why it's called "self"-worth.
  2. Your own words state that you don't think this can be resolved, so that means you're at least starting off knowing what needs to be done. There is no good way to do the hard part that comes next. I wouldn't worry so much on how to do it--it's going to suck either way for both of you. But you'll also both survive. Get it done and good luck.
  3. What is it you're really after coming here to these forums? Is it advice? Is there something specific you are trying to achieve by coming here? Is there a specific destination at which you're trying to arrive?
  4. Yeah, sorry. I stopped reading after "he didn't know what he wanted." Sounds like you do (know what you want). Pick wisely.
  5. I don't blame him. COVID fatigue is affecting all of us. It really is new territory. That said, so what? We've each of us had to deal with the death of a grandparent. It sucks, but it's also natural. Help your son understand that while circumstances right now are not necessarily ordinary, the ultimate circumstances are.
  6. If your ex showed up on your doorstop tomorrow morning asking for your hand, what would you say?
  7. "there is this guy I like" "he told me he loved me" Think about that.
  8. She's obviously not into you sexually, at least at this stage of the game. The question is why. Can you shed some light on that?
  9. What you really want to know is if he's still interested in you. And of course no one here can tell you that. Maybe he called you by accident. You seem determined that he didn't. But so what? Getting the random message or call from an ex, only for them to apologize for contacting you, is hardly a rare occurrence in the history of human relationships.
  10. Let her go. This will not end well for you.
  11. If you're having a hard time being "mentally there" in the first place, then I suspect the issue isn't physical.
  12. So what have you done in order to help him make you come? Have you discussed this with him? Have you given him pointers? Is there a specific reason he is not making you come?
  13. Wow. You all seem to be expecting the OP to bear in mind that his girlfriend "sees things differently" than he does and that she might simply "approach things emotionally." And yet amazingly you don't have any problem with her essentially judging the OP for even THINKING about something the same way as if he'd actually done it. So, I guess the lesson there is, have some patience and extra consideration for her feelings while she explodes into hysterics for your not thinking the same way as her. Outstanding.
  14. You've done nothing wrong. Your girlfriend feels enormously injured in your even considering such a thing, which doesn't make a lot of sense to me personally. But more importantly, she isn't mature enough to even have a discussion without shutting you out or resorting to theatrics. This seems to be substantiated by the fact that she's refused the idea of counseling in the past. Although I'm not a therapy-fixes-all believer, I still see this as an immature stance to take. You said this was a deal breaker on both your ends. Only you two can truly decide that, no matter what any of us say.
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