Blondiegirl Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 I've been seeing this guy for a week now but talking to him for 2 anyways.... We totally hit it off sparks flew,etc. We would call each other almost every night and it was fun. We went on on Thursday and he seemed okay but Friday and Saturday he became distant. I would text him and he wouldn't text back and he claimed he was busy but he always managed to have time for me in the past and I totally saw him online on Facebook so he wasn't so busy now was he?? Anyways.... I texted him today when I got off work tonight and was kinda livid since he was distant Friday and Saturday and always claimed he was busy ( didn't tell him about being online) I said I am not in the mood for games Daniel and he said wait what?? I said I tried to talk to you on Friday and Saturday and you were always so busy which was funny because in the past you always managed a time to call me. He went off on me said I was delusional and needed to check myself. Did I catch him in a lie?? Link to comment
Ariel85 Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 Huh? What lie did you catch him in? Sounds like he wasn't interested after the first date. That much is clear. You getting a little psycho on him just made him even more convinced he made the right choice in distancing himself. Link to comment
annie24 Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 welcome to enotalone I would text him and he wouldn't text back and he claimed he was busy but he always managed to have time for me in the past you've only known this guy for 2 weeks, so you really can't know what he's really like. only over the course of months or years can you have a better sense of how a guy us. i think you did go a bit psycho on him. I would have let him contact you instead of texting, getting angry with him not responding or on facebook. He did have a life before he met you, you know. It sounds like you two have taken things too fast and instead of getting to know each other, you're trying to make an "insta-relationship". You can't skip ahead to that. you have to get to know each other slowly, and not pretend like you've been dating forever and text each other all the time. Link to comment
Capricorn3 Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 I agree with the posts above. Seeing a guy for only ONE WEEK and then more or less going on the attack by saying "I'm not in the mood for games" does give the impression of slighly psycho. I can understand why he got defensive. I would say this is over before it even began. Link to comment
Blondiegirl Posted June 27, 2011 Author Share Posted June 27, 2011 In my defense he started that out. He would text me all the time and say miss u already! He even said one day I can't wait until we get married one day we will make such a great husband and wife. So who's the psycho?? Not me obviously! He started the whole I miss you stuff and I can't wait to see you again. So me asking a simple question of about playing games makes me psycho?? He started it not me. Link to comment
Capricorn3 Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 He even said one day I can't wait until we get married one day we will make such a great husband and wife. I hardly think he was being serious. That is typical "cutesy talk" that many people do - it's all part of the flirting stage. Did you REALLY believe he meant that!?? Link to comment
annie24 Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 It's been my experience that guys who talk like that (marriage/kids on the first few dates) disappear just as quickly. Take it as a lesson and move on. Link to comment
Blondiegirl Posted June 27, 2011 Author Share Posted June 27, 2011 So I guess me questioning his motives made him feel like oh shoot she caught me. Link to comment
annie24 Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 So I guess him getting defensive made him quiver a bit huh?? LOL I don't understand what you mean by this. Has he called you since? Look - it's cool if a guy is into you and is telling you he misses you, etc... that's great, but you still have to pace the relationship and take the time to get to know each other - not jump into the 'insta-relationship.' i think that freaked him out when you chewed him out about not calling when you haven't even been dating for 1 week. that scares guys off. Link to comment
Blondiegirl Posted June 27, 2011 Author Share Posted June 27, 2011 I don't want to play games or be used for sex. I am an adult if I wanted to play games I would play chess and I have to lay it out there so what if he gets ticked. Link to comment
Capricorn3 Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 Sounds like he wasn't interested after the first date.( That was my impression too. I would move on. Link to comment
metrogirl Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 ah - so you had sex already. Isn't that usually why the guys miss the girls so much? Link to comment
Blondiegirl Posted June 27, 2011 Author Share Posted June 27, 2011 Now wait a sec if he wasn't into me on the first date why would there be a 2nd,3rd and a 4th? Link to comment
Ariel85 Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 In my defense he started that out. He would text me all the time and say miss u already! He even said one day I can't wait until we get married one day we will make such a great husband and wife. So who's the psycho?? Not me obviously! He started the whole I miss you stuff and I can't wait to see you again. So me asking a simple question of about playing games makes me psycho?? He started it not me. Yeah, you are. You can't blame your lack of boundaries on someone else. You were loving it when he was saying these things, but now that it's stopped, he's the psycho? "He started it. Not me." Made me smile. I haven't heard that since I was 11. Link to comment
Capricorn3 Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 Now wait a sec if he wasn't into me on the first date why would there be a 2nd,3rd and a 4th? I understood your original post as saying you went on a date on Thursday and by "Friday and Saturday he became distant" which implies (to me) that after the date on Thursday he wasn't feeling the same anymore. The rest of the time it seemed you guys communicated via text or facebook, or whatever, but not actual face-to-face dates. I still only see ONE date. Where are the 2nd, 3rd and 4th dates? Link to comment
Blondiegirl Posted June 27, 2011 Author Share Posted June 27, 2011 No we went out on dates. We talked in between and after the dates. Tuesday went out, wednesday we went out and thursday we went out. We had a " virtual" date on Monday Link to comment
Lamour detruit Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 Tip: calling a guy out like that and coming on way too strong is a good way to make him run away. Seems like he sweet talked you quite a bit, and now that he's not doing so, its getting to you. Going psycho is a no no. Leave it be, and let him come to you to show he's interested for now. Link to comment
Mustachio Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 I still think you need to go back to the first reply to this thread by Ariel. You went out on a few dates, he wasnt interested and became distant, you made a slightly psycho move and he pulled away. I know things seemed to be going well, but after 2 weeks, you dont know this guy at all, and he doesnt know you, and maybe after getting to know you a bit he decided things werent right and he wanted to slow down. The only thing you may have caught, was him pulling back because dating you might not have been right for him. Either way, you should back off and let him make the next move, if any. Link to comment
Ms Darcy Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 I suspect you are quite convinced you did the right thing here. I don't think you did. You were accusatory and trying to read his mind. You did go a little crazy on him. Link to comment
holymoseph Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 Annie you are correctOmondO. I've had to learn this the hard way. It's always nice to have someone who has been there to share in their wisdom. Link to comment
MyNinja Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 I think two weeks is not nearly enough time to assess anyone about anything. I would still be making sure I have their birthday correct, lol. Are you still talking to this guy? I would back waaay off after that ordeal. No relationship will ever flourish, wether it be a romantic encounter or a friendship, staring off with issues such as this so early on. This is exactly the reason I never get persuaded or swooned in by someone who is over-complimentory, and talks about marriage, etc so freakin' soon. It's quite creepy actually and is a major red flag. The end result is usually the person distancing themselves as hard as when they were coming on to you. where's the middle ground?? Until we meet again... Link to comment
Jd1983 Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 To be honest, I don't think you caught him in any lie. Unless he told you he wanted something serious with you, I don't think he really owed you anything. If you did get intimate with him, that's one thing, he may see it as consensual or simply a fling. I would take his words about the whole marriage bit, with a grain of salt. More so than likely he was just joking. I do think you overreacted when you blew up on him about playing games. It makes you come accross as very needy. Sure you may have had a good time prior, but clearly his actions are telling you otherwise now. Link to comment
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