How is it possible to have a big family in 2010?

[lostnscared]

I'm going to be the odd ball but while a degree is great, look at the amount of college graduates that have a degree and are working a minimum wage job. Education is important but I don't think its the end all things either.

 

I feel the same way. One of my boyfriend's friends went to Purdue University and he is working at buffalo wild wings as a waiter. He graduated a year and half ago. I'm sure this is not what he thought would occur when he majored in business, and did well, at a reputable school. Though the economy is definitely effecting job prospects for new grads, I do believe that education isn't an "end all" to success but rather just ONE path that a person can take to get to success. There are other paths as well.

For me an education was my path to achieving some of my goals. Ultimately I will start my own business within the profession I'm going into--and that was always a goal of mine. I could have NOT gone to school and just started my own business, but felt that going to college would help me, and it did. But I realize that there are many people who were able to cultivate success without going to college, or without going to college for four years and I think that is fine too. I don't think every child is meant to go to school. And with this economy, the cost of college, and the fact that many grads can barely get entry level positions DOES make one think that college certainly doesn't result in success for everyone.

It's interesting that so many people do plan on paying for their "unborn's" college tuition, but something to consider: what if your child has no desire to go to college?

[OptomisticGirl]

For me I'll support my kids no matter what. I"ll always encourage college but if they don't want to I can't make them. If they choose to forgo college and we can help somewhat, I'll help them get started in the world.

[lostnscared]

For me I'll support my kids no matter what. I"ll always encourage college but if they don't want to I can't make them. If they choose to forgo college and we can help somewhat, I'll help them get started in the world.

 

I'm the same. I would def. encourage college or trade school at least(if I have sons) BUT if they didn't choose either I would try my best to respect their decision, but I would still try my hardest to at least show them the value of obtaining an education. Either way, if I had money saved up for them(which is my plan) I would give them that money regardless as long as they had some sort of "end goal"--even if it meant not going to college.

[newwave]

I suppose it's too early to talk about unconceived babies but this is something that Flakey brought up and he does have a good point. After all, with the economy many grads are unemployed. Like me, I have a masters, $40,000 in debt and can't find anything (starting a business). He never went to college, instead he went in the Navy then trade school. Trade school jobs are ones that can't be outsourced. Skilled jobs can be. I thought I was alone in thinking I wouldn't push my kids to attend college. Certainly if I have a bright child who excels in school, but what if I have an average or below average kids, should I waste money for them to do something they don't like.

[lostnscared]

I suppose it's too early to talk about unconceived babies but this is something that Flakey brought up and he does have a good point. After all, with the economy many grads are unemployed. Like me, I have a masters, $40,000 in debt and can't find anything (starting a business). He never went to college, instead he went in the Navy then trade school. Trade school jobs are ones that can't be outsourced. Skilled jobs can be. I thought I was alone in thinking I wouldn't push my kids to attend college. Certainly if I have a bright child who excels in school, but what if I have an average or below average kids, should I waste money for them to do something they don't like.

 

Yep the trades: construction, carpentry, trucking, electricians, etc are all in demand for 2010. The thing about the trades though is that they are a little hard to "get in" and takes time to develop skills and work. But my bf's cousin who is 22, NEVER stepped foot in college--he went to trucking school, and he makes 48k a year at 22. NO debt whatsoever. Meanwhile a college grad who took out 40k in loans is working as an entry level position making only 30,000-38,000. Of course overtime that same college grad will make 48k or even 60k--if they work for a while, but they'll still have that debt. I think in both cases it just depends. I'm personally glad I took the college route, because even though I hated my major, I think that going to college has led me to develop a lot of nice skills(thinking and research skills). Skills that I don't think you learn in tradeschools(just my opinion). My bf went to trade school, and I definitely feel as though I'm a lot better at out of the box open-minded sort of thinking than he is.

 

I would push my kids to pursue whatever track met their goals. But ultimately would at least try to show them how valuable and education is--even if they don't plan on going to college. Taking non-credit courses can only enhance your knowledge and skills.

[newwave]

From what I understand, there are programs where a student can go to trade school while still in high school then do an apprenticeship right after. I don't know much about it, but I have relatives who are working mechanics and other trades and they make more than I was making. Plus unlike white collar jobs that are salaried (and no paid overtime) they get paid overtime. Much better deal than college in many cases.

[lostnscared]

From what I understand, there are programs where a student can go to trade school while still in high school then do an apprenticeship right after. I don't know much about it, but I have relatives who are working mechanics and other trades and they make more than I was making. Plus unlike white collar jobs that are salaried (and no paid overtime) they get paid overtime. Much better deal than college in many cases.

 

Oh I agree--that trades are a great profession in that they are inexpensive, are hard to be outsourced and pay you very good starting out. The only drawback I see, is that I believe that their is more of a "cap" on income in the trades than their is in degree professions. But like you said with trades there is always over time, the hours are good IMO(most start VERY early in the morning and are back home by 6, etc). My bf is in the trades and he has a very long day, and physically tiring work, but he gets paid more than I do, and is usually off by 4 or 5. I do think that if you look at the debt ratio of a college student and the amount they make over the first 5, it doesn't seem "worth it" especially if you have more than 40k in student loans JUST from undergrad. On the other hand, after those 5 years, more of the "benefit" of the degree comes into place, especially if you have a masters. I don't think the trades are everyone. But I've been reading about more and more woman entering the trades, which I think it awesome. It's a GREAT way to get a career right when your out. Most DO apprenticeships right after and get jobs pretty quickly like you said--it's just that certain "trades" are more difficult than others to get in to. Whether my daughter wanted to be a hair stylist or an accountant I would encourage her and support her either way. I think too many parents and people place so much emphasis on a college education, and certainly not every child is interested in one. I was, and many ARE, but I don't really fall in to the hype about a bachelors being the NEW HS diploma(in my experience that just is not the case).

[newwave]

I always knew I wanted to go to college but now I question it completely. Would I have done better in the trades? Hard to say but in general I prefer men in them because they can make great money working 40 hours versus many white collar professions where they work 60 hours or so.

[lostnscared]

I always knew I wanted to go to college but now I question it completely. Would I have done better in the trades? Hard to say but in general I prefer men in them because they can make great money working 40 hours versus many white collar professions where they work 60 hours or so.

 

NW, I think a lot of people in your position, are questioning college, because many people believed that college was the number one path to success or the only way to be successful or that by having a degree you'd have such an advantage even in this sort of economy. But what most people are learning, is like with anything, a college degree is a tool, a good resource, a GREAT way to reflect all that you've learned--but it does not guarantee anything, not even a job. I like men in the trades a lot, hence I'm dating one. But really I think it's because I like men who are in physical fields. I finally realized after working in various sectors within my field, that I CAN'T stand jobs where I just sit down all day, or where I'm in an "office environment"--I need a job where I'm on my feet, where I'm using my hands, where I'm experimenting, etc. That is exactly why I'm transitioning to an entirely different field and ironically my field is considered a "trade". It's a much more physical job. I was always bored by office work(and still am). One of the things I do enjoy about men in the trades is that we have that much in common--the like to do physical things, and the dislike of the office.

But I also enjoy white collar men too.

[lostnscared]

link removed

 

 

That family^ had 11 kids on roughly 54,000k(from the father--not sure how much the mom makes).

[Lonewing]

I come from a large family. My mo and dad had 5 (6th didn't make it) and then my mom had two more later with her second husband. Neither of my parents are above the poverty line, but they both live well by their means. In short, living "poor" has taught them how to appreciate what they have more, and they are both very thrifty in their pursuits and their desires. New vehicles and other items with extreme depreciation are compleltey out - my dad was excited [like a boy in a candy shop] when he picked up a rebuilt, stright 1979 Ford pickup last year.

 

Their homes are places most of you would shudder at even walking through, but the point of the matter is that day-to-day funciton has taken over versus playing the "I have to LOOK good for my neighbor" form. And there is a ton of potential in both my dad's place and my mom's place, which makes tons of people cringe and groan at what could be done but isn't. The thing is, both of them are 'happy" right now - and if they do get a project done, the sense of accomplishment is enough to ensure they don't need much more.

 

My dad got a job in this fall that will cover his expenses for the next six months. $4500 might not seem like much, but if you aren't pursing huge expenses, and you keep your health up by staying active [both mental and physical], you're not going to incur many expenses. Food becoems an art of using the supermart ads, and if you do that you can not only save a ton on your bill, but by also committing to a set of meals [this week , broccoli is on sale, so our meals this week will all contain broccoli] it's not to difficult to be helathy about it either. My dad's problem is the food tastes too good, so then he eats too much. But I have seen him use all sorts of things most people would not use, like the 50 lb pumpkin we were going to feed to the pet goat because it had sat for six months - we cut it open to discover it was still a good pumpkin - so we spent the day rendering raw pumpkin into premade pumpkin mix and then put that in the freezer. We had pumpkin in pancakes and in other places for a good year after that incident...

 

A lot of people here have mentioned College as if it is the responsibiity of the parents to provide that luxury to their children. Having been through the system, I know that by being under the poverty level, you can provide your children with your physical presense AND 1-2 years of 40k college tuition just by filing a FAFSA each year and if you keep you grades up. If your kids know early on [junior high] that you WILL NOT be paying for their college, it might provide them with a better incentive to work hard in school if you instill in them the idea that they DO want to go to college. Many colleges will provide High school graduates with a 4.0 or higher [+ a good class rnak, nowadays, I'm sure] a rather good tuition waiver as long as those students hold certain standards while attending that university. Put that together and your kids will be just fine. College is a luxury, not an entitlement, and if your kids want it, they will have to work the system to get it.

 

End result, I would almost say that as the number of kids increase, the cost per kid to raise them acutally goes down. For starters, you already have routine and many supplies on hand if you are good at packing stuff away for future use - and you know where to get cheap stuff [thrift stores]. Furthermore, as the kids develop, the older children become a ready source for supervision of the younger kids for things like babysitting. Even if the younger kids don't listen, the older kids are good at reporting ot the parents what did happen, and the younger kids are very good at cross-tattling on the older kids. I'd also say there is nothing that beats learning morals and ethics than having a large family - I learned a number of lessons through them that have been beneificial to myself, like anger management, patience, and common decency.

 

Living conditions growing up were in one word Tight. Now you must rememebr, I spent the first three years of my life living in a shack at the bottom of a canyon. This shack was a wellhouse building my parents rented from the caretaker; the best part about it was that it had a concrete floor and running [albiet COLD] water. Growing up in that place meant the hot water came from a kettle on the stove - yes, practically pioneer living!! But then that place was sold and we moved to a large place, 10 acres, with a 12x72 mobile. I still remember when I had a bedroom to myself, as I am the oldest. My parents had the large bedroom - but the master bed didn't fit in the trailer, so they never put it in - they slept on the floor for the ten years or so that we all lived together in that trailer. The addition of more kids meant we evolved from my original bed and a crib to one bunkbed and a crib and then two bunkbeds and a crib - and my parents moved their pile of blakets to the living room - living room by day, their bed by night. It was only when the divorce went through that things changed up, but only a bit. The real evolution has come as we each moved out and went to our own lives.

 

My parents lives are richer now through their investment then it ever could have been in material assets. Yes, they don't have new things, and they are a bit behind hte technology curve, but wha thtey do have they appreciate - and they are more than able to get by. Yes, we have used the system from time to time, hence why it is there. However, the biggest impact was made by their insistance that we do well in school - we weren't allowed to be lazy or stay idle very often while were were growing up, and we developed hobbies and activitieis to keep ourselves active. Reading, music, homework, ging to friend shouses, you name it.

 

My parents might not have much in their retirement accounts, but my dad has his property paid off and my mom is working on hers. When that is finished, their expenses will be small since both places were truly built with a minimal upkeep/high efficiency in mind. And if they ever need assistance, my dad will have five potential places to stay while my mom will have 7. Further, if any of us kids get too far down [layoffs, etc], we can still go back home and live there for a time if we needed to.

 

That leaves this thing called travel. It's a popular thing nowadays to talllk about famous places we've all gone to. In short, it's really becoming more of a competition, I do believe - you can call yourself more "worldly" by going o more places. However, my dad is of the opposite attitude; he sees no point in spending 2 or 5 grand to go to europe for a month when he could stay here and live on that for nearly a year. He can find everything over there here, and it's not hard to find, either, if you're willing to get over the glitter. He once showed me this box canyon, about 100 yards wide by 500 yards long, full of cottonwoods and a desert mix of trees and shrubs in fall colors, with running water; it's more beautiful than the grandy canyon, in my mind, and yet so simple and so close. Conclusion? Travelling is a state of mind, not a state of place, and if you can become comfortable with discovering what is "just over that hill" you'll never be out of things to do within your own neck of the woods.

 

It takes a special state of mind to raise many children. Humble, for starters.

[Cognitive_Canine]

College isn't a luxury, it's a necessity in America to have a degree if you want a decent job. And, no, getting good grades is not enough to get a scholarship.

[Lonewing]

College isn't a luxury, it's a necessity in America to have a degree if you want a decent job. And, no, getting good grades is not enough to get a scholarship.

 

No, it's not a necessity. If you want hummers and benz and the newest phone every three months, then I suppose that job IS necessary. But otherwise...no. getting that job is more measured by your politics, not your degrees. If you have the politics and need the degrees, people will make it happen for you - if you have the degrees and not the politics, you're dead in the water no matter how many degrees you have.

 

The college education IS a Luxury - and the huge numbers of unemployed College graduates atest to this. You have been sold a bill of goods by your most trusted advisors - your educators, your support network, and everyone around you. I can't blame you for being misled.

 

Good grades in High School are just the start. But you don't need money to get scholarships for college, you need kids with a mind that drives them towards getting those scholarship opportunites. By getting good grades, they open up the door to the National Honors Society, for starters - but then, they don't need that organization to get involved with their communities through community service. The skills they develop getting those better grades will then be of great use when they are in college and in pushing themselves to be in the top 10% of their graduating college class. In short, if you instill the value in your children that the only way they will go to college is if they work for it themselves, along with the value that they WANT to go to college, then you will not need to save a single cent to get them through - they will get there by their own work. Sure, they might not be able to do all the games, play six sports, five activities teams and also be in all the clubs, etc. , but that's life.

 

However, the vast majority of jobs available in America do not require a college educaiton - they may require apprenticeship or vocational education, but again, these are both opportunities available to those who pursue them. They may require no more than a couple months of training, and then these people are making 25-30k a year, with minimum training. Compare this to their college counterparts who are SPENDING 25-30k each year and spending most of their time pursuing the college "experience." Because I'll be honest, it's not hard to do mediocre in college, ten hours of work a week out of class and you can pull down a 3.0 and that's good enough to graduate.

 

"Decent" job? This attitude puts to disgrace the millions of Americans who earned their decency doing "Dirty Jobs." In case you did not realize it, those jobs are what makes this country - not the cushy desk jobs shoveling paper. And in case you did not realize this, as long as people live, they will need daycare, trucking, auto mechanics, SEPTIC sevice, and even mortuary services. They may not make much, but then, you don't need to live the Big house Five cars lifestyle, either. That lifestyle is luxury - as is having a car made within the last ten years. But we take these things for granted, and think that's the only way to live.

 

It's not the only way - it's the rich way. But we're gonna have to wake up to a reality that is we Aren't Rich. It begins by redefining what is "Decent" and working from there. Respectable humility begins at home, and from it one can indeed amass a great fortune. Our grandparents did it this way, so why is that not good enough for us?

[tinkerbellkj]

I came from a small family of only two children, and I can say I know my parents wanted more kids but could not afford them. I had a nice childhood with lots of experiences, vacations, etc. I grew up in an upper middle class neighborhood, and I never worried about money or anything, and my parents were always very comfortable.

 

That being said, I am paying for both my bachelors and masters degree, and it probably will take me a long time to pay them off. My parents gave me some money to go towards my BA, however, I am paying back 90% of the debt. It is MY debt, and I don't feel that my parents are responsible for paying for it. I went to school, I received the benefits of the education, not my parents. My parents will soon retire and I will continue to work in order to pay off my college education. Not the funnest thing in the world, but I'll make it. I created the debt and somehow I will have to figure out a way through it. Same thing with my wedding, they did not fund that, either.

 

I certainly don't think that tuition to college should be a deciding factor on how many children you have. If that's something a parent really wants to do and has the means to do so, then absolutely, they can decide to use their money to fund their adult child's education, however, I do not feel it is necessary. My parents provided me with a great life, and I'm glad they decided to have me despite not paying for my higher education.

[lostnscared]

This is my feeling too.

[lostnscared]

Thank you for saying what I've been wanting to say in so many words: MOST Americans (middle class and working class) do not have a college education and many have done decently without it. The idea that a college education is the ONLY way to be successful is very hyped up in this country. Not to mention the fact that it completely downplays the millions of people without a college education that are doing quite decently for themselves. I think education is beneficial, but I don't think it's "needed" or even a necessity in being successful. It is a TOOL, a RESOURCE, a way to get you foot in the door. And there are many paths and tools, outside of college, that also allow you to get your foot in the door in the industry of your choice(whether it's vocational school, or the military). Education was the path for me, and I understand the value of it, BUT the mindset that it's "necessary" and that it's the new HS diploma is just not true in my experience.

[tinkerbellkj]

Agreed. I have said it before, but my husband does much better than I do despite him not having his BA, and me having a masters. For me, without formal education, I would not have gotten as far as him (hell I'm STILL not as far as him) because he is just more business saavy, has the personality and the connections that people really like. That being said, he is working on his BA because he does want it for himself, but he has and will continue to do very well even though he does not have that document.

[lostnscared]

Agreed. I have said it before, but my husband does much better than I do despite him not having his BA, and me having a masters. For me, without formal education, I would not have gotten as far as him (hell I'm STILL not as far as him) because he is just more business saavy, has the personality and the connections that people really like. That being said, he is working on his BA because he does want it for himself, but he has and will continue to do very well even though he does not have that document.

 

My bf makes more than me and I have a bachelors, he does not. He went to trade school. I'm a proponent for education because I understand that it was beneficial for me--but not necessarily in gaining my "dream career"--but in preparing me to land that career. Too many people see college as the ONLY way to get there and it isn't. It certainly isn't when you look at the number of college grads working minimum wage jobs. I would WANT my kids to attend college if they were interested in a career that required it, but unlike others on here, I don't believe that college is "necessary" and the only path to success. I do plan on putting some money aside for each child I have, so that they have SOME money to fall back on, but ultimately their education will be up to them. I'll help them as much as I can, talk with them, even before they enter HS, and make sure that I encourage and support them no matter what path they take, but I don't believe that the criteria to be a good parent involves having to pay an entire tuition. By that criteria, MANY people would not have kids.

[newwave]

My parents never pushed college on me so for that I'm lucky. It was just something I always wanted for many reasons. I generally have hated office jobs myself and for many years pursued several that involved much more than pushing pencils. I've been considering going into a more active field (I considered fitness instructors for example) because sitting around in an office can get very boring. At my last job I kept trying to persuade my boss to let me go more into the field to work (my job was white collar but several of my coworkers were blue collar). I think this is partly why I like men in the trades. In regards to dating, maybe it's me but I've always seen an intertesting pattern. Men that came from blue collar environments (even if working a white collar job) had a different attitude than men from white collar backgrounds. I can't explain it, but there has been a difference.

[Lonewing]

Agreed. I have said it before, but my husband does much better than I do despite him not having his BA, and me having a masters. For me, without formal education, I would not have gotten as far as him (hell I'm STILL not as far as him) because he is just more business saavy, has the personality and the connections that people really like. That being said, he is working on his BA because he does want it for himself, but he has and will continue to do very well even though he does not have that document.

 

 

See, this is what so many people fail to recognize is that the degree was not the vehicle. In a lot of places people started int eh field, became successful, and then picked up the degree only after so many years of experience. And then the number of people who have been "given" degrees by universities, well, that goes to show you further how much a degree is worth. And by given, I mean the celebrity type degrees, where the recipient never actually attended the school, they just gave him a degree becasue it looks good in the dean's hall of accomplishments!

 

A ton of people in college now do not know what degree they want to get, and they are swimming around in degrees that are truly worthless to someone without the work experience to back it up. A well published poet, for example, would do well to get the Creative Writing degree, as it would be a simple piece of boilerplate to advance their already successful career. someone without a career, though - well, how's going to hire a person with a piece of paper? NO ONE. They might buy that piece of paper from you, but they're not going to HIRE you based on that one piece of paper. It's not the resume, it's the reputation behind the resume.

 

If more people would work first, I do think more people would end up in the university system truly inspired to learn. What I saw in my career was a good 75% whoe were like "Hey you, the old person who just asked ANOTHER annoying question, SHUT UP so we can GO HOME EARLY!!!" REMARKABLE behavior. But in honestly, I think that's how many are - they are there to get the test, the grade and the paper, not the education. Of course it does them no good outside. If these kids actually WANTED to be there, you would not be able to get them OUT of the classrrom when the bell rung if there was not another class in the room right after - they would stay there engaged in the content of the course. Do you see that? Rarely. You want to see your real scholars? Go to the study halls - the ones in the two weeks AFTER the exam, NOT the week BEFORE the Exam!

 

All the College hype has done is given the universities the tools they need to jack up the cost of their paper, hence driving up how much our future has to shell out. It;s the most incredulous system you could ever imagine, because these kids have no expeirence yet in life necessary to make such a huge financial gamble, and they have nobody to seriously counsel them on their options - all the adults do is give them two thumbs up and dream about their young stock broker lawyer docotr engineer rushing off to make a million bucks in four years. When the reality is, there are more unemployed lawyers than there are employed lawyers, the stock brokers who make it are working 60 and 80hours a week, the doctors are in school for 10-12 years to only then have to shell out for insurance and office costs, and the engineers...well, the engineers do well because so few of them even make it through in the first place!

[Lonewing]

I think the best word you could use to describe them is 'Real.' I've had a couple like this, and they were a lot of fun to work with. Heck, all my immediate bosses [asside form the library] were blue collar - My impresion of the white collar is that they are looking for ways to exploit and organize their empires, while the blue collars are really more interested in the product, the science gettign the product, and getting the system together that will produce more of these great results.

 

Granted, I am a true in the collar white collar kid born in a blue collar shirt - no matter how hard my dad tried to make me fit into the white colalr shirt, it just hasn;t become my time to put it on yet. In my fields, you have to be a bit older before people even think about taking you seriosuly, for the first part they are afraid of youth stealing their jobs. And they are afraid of youth who have no loyalties to anyone - and we're fresh out of the tech training centers. In time, though, my time will come!

[thejigsup]

I was raised blue collar, worked blue collar for years, but never felt it was right for me. I am now strictly white collar and only date white collar professionals. Nothing wrong with blue collar guys, it's just that we don't "click". They don't get my jokes, they don't like museums and classical music, art is beyond them, and they just aren't generally interested in things I enjoy. Now, my bf is an attorney and he is the most caring, honest, hardworking person I have ever met. Unlike blue collar guys I have dated, he has always had my back and always has time to help my family or friends if they need it. He cares about others and makes a good living, even in this economy. Beat that one.

[BriarRose]

Me, too. I have mostly dated blue collar. They aren't concerned with how much money I make, whether or not I finished college, whether I own my own home or rent, etc. Is white collar work more stable? Usually. Construction guys get laid off all the time. But maybe that is why they don't judge the fact that I don't make much money and don't care about the latest trendy restaurant. I would rather go bowling, anyways.

[greywolf]

I think that in America and other industrialized countries we are used to many luxuries that we consider necessities. If you get rid of those, I can see how someone would be capable of raising more children. Personally though, I like my luxuries.

[lostnscared]

I was raised blue collar, worked blue collar for years, but never felt it was right for me. I am now strictly white collar and only date white collar professionals. Nothing wrong with blue collar guys, it's just that we don't "click". They don't get my jokes, they don't like museums and classical music, art is beyond them, and they just aren't generally interested in things I enjoy. Now, my bf is an attorney and he is the most caring, honest, hardworking person I have ever met. Unlike blue collar guys I have dated, he has always had my back and always has time to help my family or friends if they need it. He cares about others and makes a good living, even in this economy. Beat that one.

 

I don't know what hobbies have to do with whether someone is blue collar or white collar. That is more of an "individual" basis, because hobbies will differ from person to person. I don't think there is anything to beat. You have an awesome guy-great but what does that have to do with the context of the post. I'm sure that he is awesome because he is who he is NOT solely based on his occupation or the fact that he is white collar. My dad is white collar, my sister is going into a white collar profession, I AM in a white collar profession. It isn't our occupations that necessarily contribute to our hobbies, taste, and likes--though on the other hand I'm sure that they do have a slight impact on some of the activities and luxuries we desire. Nonetheless I don't think our profession or the label "white collar" means that we are good people. In terms of it never feeling right to you--maybe you just enjoy a man with a suit, who is well-educated and "cultured"? I don't have a specific "type"--in terms of blue collar or white collar. I do find though that certain white collar professions I'll avoid because of the hours associated with the field, and I'll avoid certain blue collar professions due to the instability associated. In terms of personalities--they've varied. Some white collar men have been very stuck up, and arrogant, overly conservative and sexist. Some blue collar men have been really tacky, and bitter, and ignorant acting. These have been my experiences, and personally I can't say which is better, LOL. My current boyfriend is in the trades(I guess he is blue collar) he actually majored in a white collar profession in college, but it wasn't right for him, and he really likes physical(hands on) labor careers. It's just him. But he likes museums, art, classical, country, rock, rap, r&b--ALL types of music. He watches the discovery channel and history channel for fun. He'll go to plays with me as well, and he ALWAYS is helpful for friends and family--some say EVEN too helpful and too caring and giving. He is a VERY loyal man and very family orientated. So I guess by that end, he is in the same league as your bf, he just is blue collar? LOL.

 

I am in a white collar field, but I'm going back to school this winter, and transitioning into a "skilled" sort of field that isn't white collar at all. I realized that this profession just isn't for me, and that I'm a hands on type of gal too. I understand completely what you mean about "things" just not clicking. Ironically I was raised white collar, but find myself drifting away from it, and finding my way on my own.