think my fiance may be cheating

[ToF]

I haven't read this whole thread but....

 

do her nails look better when she comes back?? are they painted a different color, do they look better? Nails never take 2 hours to do. Even when I had acrylic nails, those were done within an hour and a half. typically, nails take about 30 minutes to do. if she's getting a pedicure, that can take longer too.

 

I was thinking the same thing! It has never taken me more than an hour to get my nails done. Typically, it takes between 30 and 45 minutes.

[LostOne01]

LOL. Having opposite friends and confiding in them is not an emotional affair. And how do you know they have sexual feelings for each other? Him calling her "sexy" proves nothing. For all we know, she is telling him how the OP doesn't make her feel attractive, nor desirable, etc., hence his comment and her saying he's good for her ego. Clearly he's flattering her, because she's let him know she needs this.

 

So you wouldn't be concerned if your man had a woman texting him calling him "hotbody" and "rock hard abs"? You wouldn't be concerned if you looked on your man's phone and you see all of the sent messages erased from a woman who "strokes his ego"?LOL!! Why is she telling another man, who has sexual feelings for her that he makes her feel good? Does that even sound normal to you? She needs to handle her own business, if she has a problem with her boyfriend. Flirting with another man and lying is not going to solve it.

[river12]

Except for the total lack of sex, and as you admitted yourself, your sex life was never very stellar even when you did have it.

 

Like I said - affection is one thing, I mean, I'm affectionate with friends, family, pets. I do suspect she doesn't feel DESIRED by you, and that's a very different thing. And I do think she is sharing this with this guy.

 

mmmm well there isnt a total lack of sex so i guess your a bit off on that one. intercourse at the moment yes only because of a medical condition i have which will be fixed very shortly but we do other things as a couple. i know myself definitley show enough affection and desire for her.

[Ariel85]

mmmm well there isnt a total lack of sex so i guess your a bit off on that one. intercourse at the moment yes only because of a medical condition i have which will be fixed very shortly but we do other things as a couple. i know myself definitley show enough affection and desire for her.

 

Sorry - you said in your OP that you haven't had sex for months. I took this to be a true statement.

[river12]

So you wouldn't be concerned if your man had a woman texting him calling him "hotbody" and "rock hard abs"? You wouldn't be concerned if you looked on your man's phone and you see all of the sent messages erased from a woman who "strokes his ego"?LOL!! Why is she telling another man, who has sexual feelings for her that he makes her feel good? Does that even sound normal to you? She needs to handle her own business, if she has a problem with her boyfriend. Flirting with another man and lying is not going to solve it.

 

i agree with you, if she does have a problem of any soughts with me etc etc she should tell me. i mean for god sakes we are engaged.

[river12]

I was thinking the same thing! It has never taken me more than an hour to get my nails done. Typically, it takes between 30 and 45 minutes.

 

when she has come home from nail place her nails have been a different colour but i have only noticed this on one occasion because she said the colour didnt suit her. like i said i only thought it strange last week when she got them done again and it had only been two weeks after the last time she had them done. Whether she gets pedicures etc i have no idea.

[metrogirl]

mmmm well there isnt a total lack of sex so i guess your a bit off on that one. intercourse at the moment yes only because of a medical condition i have which will be fixed very shortly but we do other things as a couple. i know myself definitley show enough affection and desire for her.

 

 

My boyfriend and I can't have sex due to his multiple health issues which have left him unable to perform. That said, I have been probably one of the most patient, loving and caring girlfriends on the planet. I made it a point to let him know often how much I loved him and how much I still wanted him. That did not stop him from seeking attention and having an emotional affair with another woman. I did everything by the book, and I still got hurt. Just because you two do things together, doesn't mean that she can't be seeking whatever else on the side. Just don't turn a blind eye.

[river12]

Sorry - you said in your OP that you haven't had sex for months. I took this to be a true statement.

 

i should have been more clearer on that , sexual intercourse only but only due to a medical condition for me which isnt permanent.

[river12]

My boyfriend and I can't have sex due to his multiple health issues which have left him unable to perform. That said, I have been probably one of the most patient, loving and caring girlfriends on the planet. I made it a point to let him know often how much I loved him and how much I still wanted him. That did not stop him from seeking attention and having an emotional affair with another woman. I did everything by the book, and I still got hurt. Just because you two do things together, doesn't mean that she can't be seeking whatever else on the side. Just don't turn a blind eye.

 

oh i wont turn a blind eye, like ive said all along i got a gut feeling on this and like most posters have said gut feelings are usually right.

[Brownstone322]

i got a gut feeling on this and like most posters have said gut feelings are usually right.

That's kinda like "everything happens for a reason." Nonsense. One trip to the track will dissuade you of that.

 

Keep your focus on evidence and facts, not a thing else.

[river12]

That's kinda like "everything happens for a reason." Nonsense. One trip to the track will dissuade you of that.

 

Keep your focus on evidence and facts, not a thing else.

 

yes Of course i will focus on evidence and facts.

[LostOne01]

oh i wont turn a blind eye, like ive said all along i got a gut feeling on this and like most posters have said gut feelings are usually right.

 

Yup, trust your gut and keep digging.

[annie24]

when she has come home from nail place her nails have been a different colour but i have only noticed this on one occasion because she said the colour didnt suit her. like i said i only thought it strange last week when she got them done again and it had only been two weeks after the last time she had them done. Whether she gets pedicures etc i have no idea.

 

i used to have standing appointments every 2 weeks as well. that is typical. my polish starts to chip after just a few days.

 

but what is up with the text messages??

[river12]

i used to have standing appointments every 2 weeks as well. that is typical. my polish starts to chip after just a few days.

 

but what is up with the text messages??

 

see i thought nail polish takes 10 mins to put on but hey im a guy dont know all that much about that just found it a bit strange that she got home at 10.30 pm from it.

 

the texts are pretty suspicious.

[annie24]

you should get a manicure sometime. it's pretty nice. nah, at the salon, they do a lot of things to pamper you. like soak your hands, maybe do a parrafin wrap (they put warm wax on your hands). then lotion, pushing back cuticles, filing/shaping, then finally base coat, 2 coats color, one top coat, then dry. this process takes even longer for the feet. they scrub off callouses. i can see it taking 4 hours if it's a drive, and she's getting a mani/pedi, and then she's dropping by the mall and doing a bit of shopping.

 

why 2012 for the wedding? sorry if you've already covered this.

[Brownstone322]

I think we're all going in circles here, and we're all probably over-thinking what little information we have. Gather more evidence, hunter/gatherer that you are.

[river12]

you should get a manicure sometime. it's pretty nice. nah, at the salon, they do a lot of things to pamper you. like soak your hands, maybe do a parrafin wrap (they put warm wax on your hands). then lotion, pushing back cuticles, filing/shaping, then finally base coat, 2 coats color, one top coat, then dry. this process takes even longer for the feet. they scrub off callouses. i can see it taking 4 hours if it's a drive, and she's getting a mani/pedi, and then she's dropping by the mall and doing a bit of shopping.

 

why 2012 for the wedding? sorry if you've already covered this.

 

wow, pretty complexed procedure for nails. she doesent do her feet i never see her with polish on them, and shops here close at 9pm and the times she has come back from nails she hasnt had shopping bags.

 

wedding is 2011 on new years eve so i guess 2011/2012 if that makes sense

[river12]

I think we're all going in circles here, and we're all probably over-thinking what little information we have. Gather more evidence, hunter/gatherer that you are.

 

your right i know, i shall keep gathering and see how it plays out.

[river12]

interesting that i have seen every morning after a certain time my partner receives text messages from a certain phone number between 8am and 10 am but never before 8am because shes still at home, yet no text messages from this number over weekends.

[ToF]

interesting that i have seen every morning after a certain time my partner receives text messages from a certain phone number between 8am and 10 am but never before 8am because shes still at home, yet no text messages from this number over weekends.

 

You KNOW something is fishy.

[RobD70]

interesting that i have seen every morning after a certain time my partner receives text messages from a certain phone number between 8am and 10 am but never before 8am because shes still at home, yet no text messages from this number over weekends.

 

My ex gf had the same thing, "he's just a friend" she says but immediately starts dating him after she leaves me a couple of weeks later.

 

If she ain't cheating now, she's thinking about it. Time so go into self preservation mode and prepare for the hammer to fall.

 

Maybe YOU should go out more, give her a taste of her own medicine.

[river12]

My ex gf had the same thing, "he's just a friend" she says but immediately starts dating him after she leaves me a couple of weeks later.

 

If she ain't cheating now, she's thinking about it. Time so go into self preservation mode and prepare for the hammer to fall.

 

Maybe YOU should go out more, give her a taste of her own medicine.

 

 

Until i get more proof i cant say she has cheated, i agree though if she hasnt then she may well be thinking about it i guess time will tell.

 

As for the hammer who knows, i guess each girl is different , could she cope with cancelling the wedding is another question?

 

Personally i think she couldnt do it.

[river12]

Until i get more proof i cant say she has cheated, i agree though if she hasnt then she may well be thinking about it i guess time will tell.

 

As for the hammer who knows, i guess each girl is different , could she cope with cancelling the wedding is another question?

 

Personally i think she couldnt do it.

 

i think adding to the above is my partner is big on marriage and family etc and sees her biological clock ticking.

 

However She could be the type of person in my opinion to go through with a wedding because she would feel that there is no turning back because things are booked , we have a house together , or she wouldnt want to be single again , that her family would be upset if we broke up etc etc .

 

I personally hope this wouldnt be the case for her just to be marrying for the sake of it but in light of things in the past week this could well be right i guess .

[Applewhite]

Can you find out who the number belongs to? (the one that regularly texts her on weekday mornings) Have you had a chance to see what the messages say or are they deleted immediately?

 

I don't regularly text any of my friends.

[river12]

Can you find out who the number belongs to? (the one that regularly texts her on weekday mornings) Have you had a chance to see what the messages say or are they deleted immediately?

 

I don't regularly text any of my friends.

 

hi Hike14 i sent you a pm.