Post here instead of contacting your ex!

[Melting]

Why am I feeling the worthless one when my character is by far the soundest, honest and genuine?

[hereasmyself]

Your manipulation, however subtle and well meaning, hurt and confused me beyond belief. I am so scarred from this relationship. THAT is why i can not talk to you anymore. I have love for you. I will forgive one day. But you don't even realize how you treat me. You left me, now please, leave me.

[t1lersm0m1]

The new guy calls me and texts me daily. Wishes me a good morning, even sends me pics like you used to. We are seeing each other Friday. I have a good feeling about him. I'm looking forward to getting to know him.

 

I really hope you come back once I'm healed and moved on. I want to reject you like you rejected me.

 

I'm also codependant. I wish I knew all of this in my 20's. It's why I stayed with my husband, even though I didn't love him for a long time. My self-hatred, insecurity, abandonment issues and codependancy have kept me single. But now that I am getting emotionally healthy, learning and growing, my future possibilities will be endless.

 

I really can have it all.

 

If you had healed before we met, and worked on your self-esteem, it could be us. But it can take you years to get over HER, and to find your self confidence. I deserve love now!

[Melting]

I can't believe you hurt me...... I thought you were different

[periwinkle00]

I am just so MAD at you. Day after day after day.

 

I am still attracted to you, but doesn't mean I have to be with you. Might as well deal with my feelings at the source (and you do not need to be present for that to happen). If I wasn't attracted to you, this wouldn't be an issue in the first place.

[quirky]

I've been thinking of you the past days. And missing you..or whoever it was I was with. How are you nowadays? How is your art? Do you miss me at all? I am getting close to someone else. Yesterday as I was walking back home I realised there is a part of me still attached. Not in a dangerous way but I dunno...you just meant so much to me. It was all 2 years ago. On one hand I wish I could show you how much I have grown but on another I think you may not understand. I wish I could give you then what I have now. I am a better woman now, less judgemental and more authentic..I would love you better and our communication would be better.

 

I do wonder what you think of all this..I know I could pick up the phone and ask you and catch up but my feelings seem so redundant. I hate to face it. I hate to see what was lost. Instead I just think of you quietly on my own hoping to be able to love you again one day. To love you and not hate what happened. To want the best for you.

 

I would love to be back in our bond for a sec with all I have learnt. I miss our interesting talks and all the strange and funny things we did. I always miss you a bit because you were so much fun. And because you got me. I wish we were strong enough to love each other properly and fully and maybe then we wouldn't part...or maybe we would anyway. I have been tempted to contact you lately but I don't know if I can do light talk. I know you are a fighter and I know you are well. So I try and leave it at that..

 

I miss you

[periwinkle00]

Trying to drink away the pain, and it just backfires. Last night at my friend's was a disaster.

I honestly have no reason to talk to you anymore. Now I may have offended my other friend last night when I was drunk.

I just need to stay away from the booze for a bit. It's expensive too.

[magicangel]

I'm in a sort of shock u r ridiculouswhy'd u even ask me back for, I dnt think u even know why u do the dumb things u do, and its sad that I love u, I made bad choices but u, u knew exactly how to hurt me and continue to do so but amazingly today I dnt feel too bad ha weird huh, as psychotic pathetic and desperate as I acted I am finally finding my self worth, u dnt deserve me u deserve someone exactly like u and I hope u find her soon

[Melting]

I have never thrown away someone as easily as you did.

 

It is a shame it took our break up for me to realise what type of person you truly are

[t1lersm0m1]

I love(d) you but I wasn't happy. I truly wasn't happy. It was so obvious that you were still in love with her. She asked you why you hated her new beau, and you said because he came between you two reconciling. The correct answer would have been "I don't hate him. I'm very happy for you two."

 

You broke my heart every time you talked about her. We dated six months and even though I met both sons, you didn't want me at T's football game in case she was there. You didn't want to "cause trouble" bringing me, even though she included him in everything.

 

You probably still aren't over her.

[hopelessincan]

I miss you. I still want you to come back. Are you thinking of me too? Certainly you must be.

 

your pride will never allow you to admit it though. I know that. I still want to call you, see you, hold you. There's no other connection like ours.

 

are you seeing anyone? Something tells me no...but its coming soon I am guessing.

 

I think I'm in a rebound. No I know I am. On both sides.

he and I got a little too close the other night. I'm freaked out now. It felt wrong. Yet he and I ccontinue to tall and are spending a lot of time together. We were better off jusnot crossing that line. He's great dont get me wrong. Has a lot going for him....we are very different but the same. But the things that are different are too much. Its not going to become something and hopefully we will stay food friends but that means we have to stop now.

 

please call me.

[lioness726]

 

If you had healed before we met, and worked on your self-esteem, it could be us. But it can take you years to get over HER, and to find your self confidence. I deserve love now!

 

Sounds quite similar to mine, my dear. Albeit slightly different. But I understand that sentiment all too well.

 

 

 

Dear Douche-Rocket,

 

For some reason I cried tonight. It's been exactly 5 weeks since we were finished and I obviously hurt less. But I talked about you with friends today and I'm starting to get to this point where talking about you and your behavior just hurts me even more. It's like you're completely fine and you were already over me before you ended things. And the funny thing is, you didn't WANT to break up with me. You almost didn't that night! You carried on as if things were normal and... BAM.

 

So the fact that you're over it now just f***ing kills me. How is this so hard for me and not you? I guess you really don't love me. I guess you never actually did feel as deeply. I can't believe it because I was so goddamn convinced, as was everyone else. Maybe I just wanted it too much that I felt like you did too. But that f***ing hurts. I love you... yet, you don't love me.

 

I know you think everything is copacetic between us. I can't believe you asked my friend, "Why didn't she ask to use my crutches when she broke her foot?"

First of all, how the hell would I know that you owned crutches? Secondly, wouldn't you know that you're the last person in the world that I would ask??

 

Your best friend was also surprised that I'm not over you. Are you boys just THAT clueless? Or does he know something I don't? He lives with you so maybe he sees how "over me" and "moved on" you are. Maybe he knows about all the girls you're now f***ing... I really wish you aren't. Makes me feel even crappier than I already do.

 

You told me you were ready for a girlfriend when I came back into your life in March. I seriously hope you don't feel that way now. I seriously hope you're staying away from any kind of relationship. First of all, I don't know how your friends are going to handle you bringing around a new girlfriend... They're already pissed at you now for doing this.

 

*sigh* These are the things I think of that kill me. I wish they didn't kill me. How would you feel if you knew I was dating someone new? You'd probably shrug your shoulders and act like you didn't care. But deep inside you would. You'd never acknowledge it openly though. You may kill the feelings with weed, whiskey, and video games. That's exactly what you did with your ex.

Was I just a distraction for you and nothing more?

 

I just want you to know that we aren't friends. We never were and we never will be. Please don't think for a second that everything is okay between us and we can hang out and be friends soon. If you think that way, you can take your XBOX controller and shove it up your... I really shouldn't wish bad things upon people.

 

I hate that you have this power over me. I feel like I possibly put you on a pedestal. People tell me that I'm better than you. So how come someone who I'm supposedly better than doesn't even want me???

 

I really, really wish I was over you. I hate feeling this way. I know you don't deserve my tears. But I also cry for myself- for how fooled I was, for actually believing this could have been something real and deep. I cry for all the hopes and beliefs I have lost. I cry because I truly believed in you. But I was wrong.

 

I'm signing out. I hope tomorrow is better.

 

ps. I have a date on Sunday. He's nice and cute, too young, but we have a few common interests. He seems rather respectful. I'm not sure if he will try to kiss me. I'm a little worried about that. I met him at a bar and we talked a lot of the night. Exchanged numbers. He's just a distraction. I just don't want to feel anything for you anymore and I'm trying to find ways to accomplish that. He asked me on the date and I agreed. I need to stop thinking you were so great. I know you really weren't. And even if you were... someone who doesn't think I'm the most amazing woman to have by their side, really isn't that great at all.

 

Get rid of your demons, boy. Or else you're going to end up old and alone.

[Melting]

I actually feel embarrassed for caring so much when you cared so little.

 

I feel like a fool

[jane26]

Why did you take advantage of my good nature? Did you see doormat on my forehead?

[AR1]

I feel so worthless, so pathetic. I don't want to continue on. It's a struggle to get out of bed lately. I can't believe you don't want me. That to open up to me even a little bit is just too much for me to ask. I'm so sorry I was irritable that last Saturday. I had other things going on and I couldn't believe that you just didn't seem interested in supporting me. That is what hurts most. You don't even want to show support when things don't involve you. I knew you were wrong for me but I was just compelled to stay and try to make it right. Why?!? You're likely not hurting now. Why am I so crushed?

[Ammieg]

i think about you, all the time. I hope you are OK. It was weird seeing you on Sunday, just the two of us alone. It made me sad. I hope your big presentation went OK at work. Sending you love, even though you dont deserve it, I send it anyway. I still care. But i wont contact you again.

 

xx

[Melting]

I long for the day I can find happiness.

 

For now I deal with the pain of rejection, betrayal, worthlessness

[IAmFCA]

A message for each of you.

 

I have been so wonderfully healthy, off of ENA, learning to sleep, getting it together in my own piecemeal way. And now, after the week is done, I have a few things to say.

 

1. To my sweet sociopath. Honestly, I think I know you. This last bit surprises me, but now that I am up to speed, OK, I get it. So I will say this to you in a way nobody else would. Yes, you rocked my world and I dare say I rocked yours. No, you will not ever be forgotten. But sweetheart, you have got to let me go. You have a wife now. Eventually, I will give myself to someone else. I will not ask for your approval. I will expect you to leave us alone. I have said nothing to you or to Ann, nothing. I have left you to your new life. It is time for you to embrace that life and leave my men alone. I will go out into my future without you, and without expecting to ever talk to you again, because indeed, I cannot trust you with my friendship. Even still, I will wish you peace in your new life, as you must find it there babe. That is where you have chosen to be. I see that you have wiped our city off your map completely, as if you have never lived here. And perhaps in your psyche that is easiest for you. But that is not the path to happiness. The path to happiness is through the hell, not around it. Whatever pain rests here for you, find it. Face it. And then you also will find what you can be thankful for.

 

If you cannot do this, then seek counseling, and maybe, seek an annulment. Your behavior leading right up to your wedding is disrespectful to everyone involved, you, your wife, the person who says she was your gf, me, whomever else -- I would include those who stood with you at the ceremony. Your behavior makes a mockery of their hope for you, their smiles at you.

 

My goodness, B, let this anger pass. You do not need to control anyone. Just let it all be.

 

(2) To my sweet ex-crush and new acquaintance. Dang it man, I cannot shake this intuition that you are my guy. I will not speak this out loud. But as we navigate our connection, this sense grows. Even as I get accustomed to losing you, it grows. You called today to say I gotta get it together -- it grows. When I called to tell you you were being threatened I knew I would lose you. But you know, I had already written you off. So, okay, I have lost you. But the thing is, I haven't lost you. You called today to announce your break precisely because I haven't lost you. Others, you just say You know what? Im out. This, you said, I won't be gone for too long. And you don't know how long, I know. And I will miss you, I know. And you will begin your journey out of the darkness. For this I am grateful. And so, guess what, my respect for you grows.

 

So d it all. I have to let you go at the same time that my appreciation for you grows as well. And yours for me, even as you made the call. And I said something that nobody understands, but I said it and you share the same sensation. It is just plain as day to me that we should be together, and plain as day that now is not the time. And so here I am, trying to be all that I can be. And maybe you and I never will be. But my instincts still scream it, even as my head and my actions have closed that door.

 

And you know what? If it happens, then please God protect us. Because no matter how much I try, I cannot assert that B will ever, ever, ever let me go. Giving me to you would eat him up and I don't know why. Because you are better looking perhaps? I do not know. I am hopeful that by then, whatever he processes in his mind will simply be in his mind, and he will leave us out of it.

 

I am sorry now, for what my bad bad choice may have cost me, in you. Oddly, though, I think it became a blessing. It is giving us space.

 

So, you, you whose words helped guide me into my new job, you whose commitment helped guide me into my new body, you whose clarity I welcome every time we speak, you I have not let you go. And when I am done writing this, I will, again, bundle you up and put you in storage. But it is not the same.

 

Good on you today, M. Godspeed.

[hopelessincan]

I cant believe I just texted you. As if I just texted you. Funny. The better my life gets, the more I miss you. wtd is wrong with me?

 

the more I move on, the worse I feel. I don't think anyone will every dill your shoes. I've met so many ppl ten times better than you yet they aren't better than you.

 

I've always been able to move on, why can't I from you?

 

 

 

I think you've killed my hearr

[Melting]

You didn't play that much of a part in my life today.

I hope it stays that way

[Hazyillusions]

I ache for you and it's driving me insane. I hate you.

[Hazyillusions]

How could it be that I meant so little to you when you meant so much to me?

 

This f hurts I can't breathe.

[IAmFCA]

of course I spent all night wanting you. haven't done that in ages, ever maybe. what's up with that. what if you don't. no, you will. I just have to pray, really, that God's got my back on this one, or on whatever it is that it's supposed to happen now.

[AR1]

Seeing you in your truck as I drove home yesterday was brutal. My mind reels thinking of who you must have been going to meet because you don't just come into town for nothing. I can't believe you left me. I still want you. I ache for you. I am starting to hate you too though - its a strange combination. Why wasn't I enough for you to care about and talk to? That's not that much to ask for....

[t1lersm0m1]

Second date last night with the new guy. Third date is tomorrow. Last night my Mom asked how the date went, and I told her good. She asked me what if you come back into my life? I told her, and I know this is true, that if you came back, I wouldn't take you back. Maybe six months or a year from now, because as someone on this board pointed out, you need a lot of time to heal.

 

22 years with your wife, I was dumb to think you were over her after 10 months. But I'm learning and growing, and unless someone is at least a few years out of a marriage/divorce or long term relationship, I'm not going to entertain giving them my time. Me and my heart are worth more than taking a chance on a guy who may or may not be over an ex who he was with for a significant time.

 

I don't really have the desire to come here and post to you much anymore. This very well might be my last message to you. I thought to myself last night, "Wow, I only thought of E a few times today, and only in passing, not actual memories of events."

 

I'm healing. It's going quickly because I learned to love myself last year. Last year it took me six months to get over a two month relationship. I've almost flipped that script this year. Almost two months out, and I'm almost over a six month relationship.

 

I did love you, and part of me still does. But I know I won't always love you. My feelings are slowly fading.

 

I hope you are well. I hope you learn how to love yourself and move on from your heartbreak. And from the bottom of my heart, I hope you find happiness, whether that be alone or with another woman, I hope you find happiness. You deserve it. We all do.