THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE, Part 2

[Wobbler]

Day 7

Surprisingly easy so far today... I think she's doing NC with me because when i woke up today, she has blocked me on skype. I've not contacted her at all so i see no other reason for her to block me other than she has wanted to talk to me. I sent her * * * * to her and that should be getting there in the next couple of days so i'm kind of nervous about the backlash from that, i put a letter in it saying sorry for being such a * * * * so it will be interesting to see if she gets in touch with me when she gets the stuff. I dunno, I guess today I realized how pathetic the whole break up is and i'm questioning whether i actually need someone like that in my (already disruptive) life.

[LisaMarie]

Day 1 for me

 

We had no contact for a week before, be he would always contact me first and I would always give in. I'm stronger this time.

[Nappyloxs]

Day 35

 

Tempted to break NC today, just to ask her to dinner or something. I am not going to, I am going to fight the urge and get my head together. If I still feel this way in a week than maybe (if I can last for a week).

 

The minute someone advise me that it is okay to contact her, I always do. I am not going to this time. As much as I love her and want her back, I want it on my terms so to speak this time. I just want her to acknowledge that she screwed up too in the relationship and that she is sorry for it and will try to change in the future because she realizes she loves me.

 

That is a lot to ask for I guess and just will forever be a dream

[dgmc]

Day 1 (of the challenge, been no contact for 11 days)

I miss her. She's contacted me only to make sure I'm doing ok. These are just attempts to suppress the guilt she has. I try my best to move on but ultimately the only thing that keeps me going is the thought that she'll start to miss me soon and come back.

[copingjealousy]

Day 1 of the challenge

 

I love my boyfriend very much but he has trusting issues. He constantly questions me everyday about guys. Even if Im at home, he thinks Im busying picking up guys on Facebook. He got me to the point where I have to close my wall post on FB and only have 1 pic of myself so that no one else can do anything to me. I kept trying to understand for him and give in to his requests because I know he has a genuine heart just that his insecurity causes him to think that what he's doing is right. I have broken up with him many times over this, everytime we get back we're ok for while, then the next episode starts. I have come to a conclusion that I have to break up with him for good this time and hopefully his loss for me would be strong enough that he will start to seek help and fix himself up.

 

I broke up since Saturday, only just emailed him and he emailed back very bitter. On monday he sent a general email regarding his house key and i replied likewise very short and uninterested. After seeing this post, I like to take on the challenge of NC for 30days, even though it is hard that his bday is this Sunday. Do you think I can sms to say Happy Bday? or just ignore it? Im thinking that i should ignore it completely and not even see him on his bday because he needs to know how it feels to lose me for good.

 

What do you guys think?

[copingjealousy]

You should block him from FB. I had to do it cos even tho i broke up with my bf, i was FB stalking him lol

[The Don]

Hello all,

 

I will not belabor the gory details of my divorce (I am the dumpee/divorcee) in this and went NC four months ago. Well, I broke it yesterday. The rationale for me breaking NC (via text message to two separate phones...didn't know if either was still active) was that since it was her birthday the previous day, it was the right thing to do by wishing her birthday wishes....I didn't even do it on the day of the birthday...how lame could that be and to send it to two different phones...how OVER THE TOP!!!

 

To my surprise, she responded immediately and kindly. Needless to say, I feel like I'd began to recover some personal power in that time, albet very minimal, but it was my personal power.

 

Today, I'm sure she feels even better and even more empowered about her decision thanks to my stupidity and quest to "do the right thing".

 

My suggestion, if its worth anything is once you go NC, don't break it! Now I have to start all over again...day 1. THIS ISN'T THE PLACE YOU WANT TO BE...IT'S HE!!.

[Nappyloxs]

Thanks, I needed to read your post.

[dgmc]

DAY 1

Already cheated. I read another thread posted and the dumpee said that his ex still had picture of them together up on facebook. I had to check if my ex still did. I dunno why. She did have a few pictures of us tagged together but removed the profile pictures. I took the time to remove all of mine. Honestly, my main motive is to hope she notices. I am weak. Now that I know about the pictures, I can move forward and not think about it. I will be strong here on out.

PS - it didn't feel good looking through her picture again.

[Yostina]

Day 13

 

Feeling a bit better. NC all the way!!!

Hang on to it guys!

[Starrgrl]

DAY 47

 

Had a difficult time last night.

My distraught feelings are returning. I thought I was past that.

Sigh, this isn't easy to get over at all.

I wish I didn't fall for him so deeply..

but guess you can't control your emotions.

Stupid past scenarios kept on playing in my head.

And some things he used to tell me.

But they mean nothing now.

Hurts to know everything I held dear was all a big fat lie.

 

 

Why did you have to shatter my soul so completely T? :sad:

Why did you have to throw my heart to the dogs?

[oceanblue535]

Day... doesn't even matter. I'm never speaking to you again. I'm seeping with anger. I wish I could cut your throat with a sharp broken bottle. I hate you so much. There's no turning back after this. You've betrayed me as much as the last ex.

[deecbee]

Day 5

 

Does anyone else just get impatient and wish they could fast-forward 6 months from now?! It is so agonizingly slow!!!!

[Yostina]

I'm almost becoming speechless and you guys ALWAYS describe how I feel. Somehow this makes me feel a bit better I don't know exactly why!

[deecbee]

I'm almost becoming speechless and you guys ALWAYS describe how I feel. Somehow this makes me feel a bit better I don't know exactly why!

 

Because you're a human just like the rest of us!

[Yostina]

Bingo! hehe

[Rotxsen]

It's a tough call... I guess it just comes down to if you will be able to handle any type of response or no response. From my experience I did it, and didn't hear back for a whole week. Strange as you wouldn't have thought after a week there would even be a response. I'm fairly certain she has long ago forgot about my bday this week though, ah well.

 

I'd definitely hold off on making the decision though until you know what will be best for you.. it's funny how we are the ones who get hung up on the birthdays and they don't.

 

Well she did said happy bday to me like it was nothing she was soon after talking about how wonderful her new bf was and I soon ended that conversation but now that she's running single from what these friends or should I say stalkers say they are like go for it etc.

[shelbubbly]

well its day 11 and doing ok, mornings seem to be the worst for me as soon as i wake up it sorta hits me then, sometimes i really want to get a call or email from hubby saying hes changed his mind but i know it wont happen

[MrSpeed]

Day 12

 

Still struggle in the evenings and the mornings but keeping busy during the day really helps. Still miss her though.

[Morning]

My NC started 2 hours ago.

[Yostina]

Lucky you because you have just talked to your ex a while ago, and be strong because you have a long time to go =/

[Morning]

I know, tnx

[Chandra]

Been in NC for 48hours after breaking an initial 8 days... Actually glad I broke NC the first time... The breakup was initially rough, and talking things over allowed us to maturely discuss our feelings and send each other off with a fair goodbye.

 

I'm Feeling better than ever and doubt I will be strongly tempted contact anytime soon...

 

Still hoping she comes around eventually =P.

[Nappyloxs]

Day 36

 

Feeling much better than yesterday which was pure hell. It is really time to let go. I can actually pick my dream girl and it isn't her. Today is the beginning of focusing on me again. I loved her and always will, but she will never change and will never come back. It is time for me to live my life.

 

I actually had a strange dream last night. She was in it, we were out and about. For some reason, when I was driving home I was trying to drive from the passenger seat and nobody was in the driver seat. Needless to say, the car was going all over the place. I woke up and thought to myself that my dream was telling me I am just a passenger in my own car and there is nobody to drive it but me and I am not taking control. It is time to take control.

[dgmc]

Day 2 of the challenge (19 days of NC)

Yesterday morning was rough. I went through my facebook and removed photos of her. Then went to my messages and deleted all the old messages. It sucked seeing those again. They were so nice. Why can't life be like that again?

Later on in the day, I felt a lot better. Strangely enough I was happy. I dunno why, there was no reason for it. I guess it was because for once I wasn't upset. I could think of her and not get down. But I still missed her.

 

This morning was a little rougher. I've been thinking about her. I read the "grass is greener" thread. It gave me hope at first. But then I read into the replies and lost a little hope. I've been thinking a lot of how I acted towards the end of the relationship. I've been feeling a little embarrassed. How as she was pulling herself away, I was trying to win her back by getting more involved and intimate. I usually don't write love letters and I know she doesn't exactly like them. But I still wrote one for her on her birthday. I'm sure she just threw it away and it just made her sick. I feel a lot more sick than yesterday thinking about how she threw my extra effort to love her aside.

 

The one thing I have going for me is I know I will never break the NC. Or atleast I will not be the first to break contact. I strongly feel that I do not even have that option. I know I will sound pathetic. I made it clear that if she ever felt for me again, that she can try and contact me. And I've been waiting for that contact ever since. I want it soooo bad.