duke nukem Posted February 24, 2012 Share Posted February 24, 2012 Well it was probably when we were in bed and things had really gotten hot when his dog jumped up beside me and began humping my arm. Ha ha ha, that had to be awkward. I've heard lots of things about people being interrupted by their dogs, from the dog simply jumping on the bed to the dog investigating the "action area" Link to comment
OptomisticGirl Posted February 24, 2012 Share Posted February 24, 2012 The VERY first time my husband and I had sex I went to get on top of him and kneed him in the balls. He was a good sport about it that - 5 minutes later he was ready to continue! Link to comment
Silverbirch Posted February 25, 2012 Share Posted February 25, 2012 Ha ha ha, that had to be awkward. I've heard lots of things about people being interrupted by their dogs, from the dog simply jumping on the bed to the dog investigating the "action area" Yes Dukey, and sometimes my dog will lick my man's hands or feet or whatever he can almost as soon as we start cuddling up. Whenever I get into bed now, I tell our dogs in a really firm voice to get down to the bottom of the bed and stay there,but usually we have to lock at least one of them outside. Link to comment
meoww Posted February 26, 2012 Share Posted February 26, 2012 I was young and still living at home. My then boyfriend and I got the idea that we should shave each other. So we proceed to do it, but in the bedroom and dunking the razor in one of those huge big gulp cups, instead of in the bathroom, in the event that my mother came home. Well after we were all done and whatnot, I dumped the cup in the toilet. I thought I flushed, but apparently not. My mom comes home and uses the bathroom and knocks at my bedroom door: "What did you dump in the toilet? Is that your LEG HAIR?? I know it's winter and all, but you can making an effing wig out of that. You clogged up the toilet, fix it." Haha! I had a backache from laughing so hard...lol. This is disgusting Oo hahahaha I think you just made my day Link to comment
meoww Posted February 26, 2012 Share Posted February 26, 2012 i have two horrible ones! One is way worse than the other though 1) queefing in an ex's face when he was giving me oral. 2) FARTing in a guys face when he was giving me oral!! so embarrasing.. The girl version of this happened to me, the very first time I went down on one of my boyfriends he farted, right at the moment that he came!! I thought it was hilarious (and a little gross). I used to torture him by making farting sounds in public... Link to comment
quirky Posted February 26, 2012 Share Posted February 26, 2012 I don't think I've had one.. o_o Closest to it is my ex accidently urinated in my mouth while I was giving him oral but I found it funny. Link to comment
duke nukem Posted February 26, 2012 Share Posted February 26, 2012 I don't think I've had one.. o_o Closest to it is my ex accidently urinated in my mouth while I was giving him oral but I found it funny. Funny? Wow, you are a good person! And how exactly did he do that? Link to comment
pepsi71ocean Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 A few from memory. Back when i was 17 (gf ATT was 16) we were hanging out in the woods in my truck. (actually its a small parking lot out in the woods in the middle of no where, with a stone memorial there, we called it stone circle) And at this point we had already made it past making out and i got to feel her up, and but this time she was laying accross me, and we were making out when i decided "maybe i should go and finger her".. so we started she was really tight, and then she turned and went down on me, i had never gotten a bj before so i really didn't know what to expect, right as im receiving this dam state trooper comes barreling down into the parking lot, and shines his light on the truck, in the excitement i came just as she took her mouth off and tried to get up and it went all over her face, the state trooper came over and flashed the light into the truck. After explaining that it was not planned this way, he told me that he was going to check on the fire station and would be back and said to take her out to dinner, and that when he comes back he better not see us there. while with the same girl in HS, i was making out with her and had one of her boobs out and my mom came walking into the basement, apparently in the enjoyment of making out and stuff i didn't hear her come down the steps to the basement. have more but will post them up in time... Link to comment
beaut88 Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 Having sex at my parents house with my ex and my dad walks in on us just as he was coming to tell us if we heard anything (he thought it was a burglar) then i got cramp looked a bit odd with us both making noises! Not good!! Link to comment
pepsi71ocean Posted March 2, 2012 Share Posted March 2, 2012 After high school (my head was not in the right place, so i was working at this company and go to be good friends with a guy named brian, and then i met his wife amanda, and soon amanda and i started hitting it off. Once day while we were in the middle of screwing brian came home early from work. and walked in or us. needless to say i was the awkward one because it resulted in my first 3 way, also to state that i haven't talked to them in a while, not to say it was the last 3 way we had but definitely interesting. Link to comment
Snowy Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 After high school (my head was not in the right place, so i was working at this company and go to be good friends with a guy named brian, and then i met his wife amanda, and soon amanda and i started hitting it off. Once day while we were in the middle of screwing brian came home early from work. and walked in or us. needless to say i was the awkward one because it resulted in my first 3 way, also to state that i haven't talked to them in a while, not to say it was the last 3 way we had but definitely interesting. Wow, so Brian was okay with you screwing his wife... Link to comment
pepsi71ocean Posted March 4, 2012 Share Posted March 4, 2012 Wow, so Brian was okay with you screwing his wife... im still not sure to this day if he ever really was, i know that she had a tendency to be a little wild, and until that day i thought he never knew, i guess i was wrong, but turns out from a mutual friend i found out she has a small circle of guys she is exclusive with. i thought it was just me. Link to comment
hrtlsngl7 Posted March 12, 2012 Share Posted March 12, 2012 Was in the middle of sex w/ (now ex-) wife. Doorbell rings. I cuss up a storm, put on a robe, and answer it. It's a police officer. Me Officer: Is Mrs. B here? Me Officer she come to the door? Me: Ummm,...sure... *I go get Mrs. B.* Mrs. B: Yes? Officer: Mrs. B, we got a call from your mother. Is everything okay? Mrs. B: Uhhhh, yeah? Officer: Okay, Mrs B you mother was worried about you, please give her a call. Mrs. B: Uhhhh, okay. Having cops show up at my door totally killed my boner. We didn't have sex for a couple of days after that. Link to comment
PaintWithLight Posted March 12, 2012 Share Posted March 12, 2012 Was in the middle of sex w/ (now ex-) wife. Doorbell rings. I cuss up a storm, put on a robe, and answer it. It's a police officer. Me Officer: Is Mrs. B here? Me Officer she come to the door? Me: Ummm,...sure... *I go get Mrs. B.* Mrs. B: Yes? Officer: Mrs. B, we got a call from your mother. Is everything okay? Mrs. B: Uhhhh, yeah? Officer: Okay, Mrs B you mother was worried about you, please give her a call. Mrs. B: Uhhhh, okay. Having cops show up at my door totally killed my boner. We didn't have sex for a couple of days after that. Hmmm I gather that you are not Mr. B? Link to comment
In the Dark Posted March 13, 2012 Share Posted March 13, 2012 A partner queefing in my face while I was giving oral for the first time when I did not know what queefing was. Finding that the dog had gone into my bedroom waste basket and took out a used strawberry flavoured condom to chew on out the backyard. Having sex in an ex's apartment when her Mother unexpectedly turns up and instead of knocking on the door, immediately puts her hand through the bedroom window to open up the curtains and starts talking. Link to comment
Laura11111 Posted March 14, 2012 Share Posted March 14, 2012 Hahaha...great thread. I haven't read them all but I have a good one. I was about give my boyfriend (now an ex) a bj and I noticed a small piece of poop stuck in his butt crack. I didn't want to point it out but I also didn't want to get intimate with the poop there so I told him to go wash first. He did and we ended up having sex but the whole time, I was terrified that the poop was still there and that it would fall on me. The poop never showed up so I never mentioned it. To this day, I wonder if he noticed it when he was washing and if he knew that I knew it was there. Lol. Link to comment
Leya Posted March 14, 2012 Share Posted March 14, 2012 The only thing I can think of was my Ex guy and I went for a pic-nic one day in a huge park. We found a secluded place, laid down the blankets, ate a good meal, snuck some wine, and then we covered oursleves with a second blanket and he started fingering me and we were kissing. All of a sudden a DOG was in our face, licking both our faces, wanting to join in on the action, lol We couldn't get him off us! He was very excited and wanting to join in the loving. Eventually his owner called him away. We found it funny...but it did kinda kill the mood...having dog slobber all over us. Guess our place wasn't as secluded as we had thought! Link to comment
OutdoorsyDi Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 Most embarrassing was a **p___y** fart w/my (now live in BF) about the 2nd or 3rd time we slept together. We both just laughed about it, thank God. Guess that happens occasionally when you older (50's) Link to comment
PJK Posted April 25, 2012 Share Posted April 25, 2012 Once after a particularly long time in between orgasms I was having sex with the ex gf and I was just on the verge so I pulled out and she finished me off with her hand. Well, lets just say that it had a little something extra on it because I ended up getting some friendly fire on my own face... Link to comment
Phoenixfire Posted April 26, 2012 Share Posted April 26, 2012 God i love this thread... okay, my moment was when me and a friend girl were hanging out on her sofa under the covers at her house and she asked me to finger her. I obliged and she started giving me a handjob... right as i was about to finish on her hand, her mother walked in and started talking to us. We had an entire coversation with her hand still wrapped around me and my fingers still inside her (without her mom noticing)... In the middle of the conversation, it was the hardest thing ever to keep still and keep a straight face, escpecially when she decided it would be funny to run her fingers over my tip while i was talking... Most awkward yet fun thing ever Link to comment
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