Kalika

When someone doesnt do something you want them to, instead of getting mad and sending subtle angry hints, it makes more sense to me to talk to them about it. I'd rather just tell him how I feel than play games.

Wow that's pretty complicated. Honestly the biggest thing is that he's not over his ex gf, so he'd basically be using you to make himself feel better.. if he's a nice guy, it's fine to hang out with him and be his friend for now and you can explain why you want to do that.. maybe one day he'll be over her and then you can have something with him

That's exactly what I told him when I talked to him.. I said that in my experience, someone that doesn't want to see or talk to you just isn't really into you that much. so he started calling me more. but I still dont want a bf who's chicken sh**.

he did talk about hanging out today or tonight. we didn't make specific plans, but he's supposed to call me in a little bit...

he told me that he's terrified because i'm the first girl in a while he would consider a relationship with and he likes me a lot.. and I genuinely believe him. When we're together it's awesome and he makes me feel genuinely cared for. that's why i dont understand this at all.. how often should I reasonably expect to see him? I think I mentioned before he lives about 15-20 mins from me.. we're both busy, but I would think that at least 2 or 3x a week wouldn't be impossible, even if it was just for a quick dinner or something. I don't think that asking for 2-3x a week is unreasonable, but am I wrong??

Hey redding.. It might not be so much that alcohol is high on his list of priorities; it could simply be that I'm just low on the list. But you're right, I'm definitely not getting what I need.

maybe you could just flat out tell her that you want some alone time with just the two of you. as far as her not being as romantic as you, well .. that might be harder to adjust to, but you have to try not to take it personally, as long as you still think she loves you

I think before you should even worry about sex, you should focus more on dating. Don't rush into exclusivity or sex with anyone.. take your time finding/getting to know someone. Only when you are comfortable enough to talk about your expectations of each other, you should even begin thinking about having sex.

But most alcholics have to have it more days out of the week than not. I think he's just enjoying being a normal guy his age.. we are both in our mid twenties ..

Honestly I think you should just dump him any way you feel most comfortable. I think most people would disagree with me, and I'm sure that with someone you had more respect for you'd do it differently, but hey.. I'd definitely dump someone by email if I could avoid the awkwardness of that phone call.

No redding.. he only goes on weekends, but since that's the best time for us to meet up, it means a lot to me that he takes both nights to go to the bar.

Do you think I should give it more time? I want to give it a chance but I'm really afraid of this continuingn much longer.. I don't know if I'm jumping the gun but my first instinct is to dump him and get out of this situation

No DN .. he's not someone I would care to date. He is a nice guy but would not be a good boyfriend.

Hey matty thanks for the response Yes he did mention that his ex told him she didnt want him around that much, and she cheated on him a lot too I guess .. as for talking to him about hanging out, after we had that talk he said he wanted to see me, asked what I was doing the next night (yesterday) but then when yesterday came around he just asked what I was doing, and then told me he was gonna call his friends and see what was up. Tonight I flat out told him I didn't feel like going to a bar but wanted to do something low key. And then I asked if he was going to the bar ,and he's like yeeeeeeah, i'm gonna call so and so.. so that's when I just told him I was going to call some people up and said bye.. I did suggest a movie tonight.. he didn't say anything about it so I just figured he wanted to go to the bar. Where he always is, every time he goes out. I figured I made myself pretty clear when I approached him and talked to him about how this is making me feel, and nothing has changed. Now granted it's only been a few days since we had that talk, but he had the perfect opportunity to ask me to do something this weekend and he totally blew it. That's why I really need input asap, he's calling me tomorrow afternoon around 2ish adn I'm seriously thinking about just ending it right then and there.

Hey everyone this is my first post, my friend told me about this site. So here I am.. I have been dating someone for the last 2 months, and he is officially my boyfriend as of just over a week ago. I haven't seen him since new year's eve and he lives 15 mins away. Last night he went out to the bar he always hangs out at. Same thing tonight. He acts like he couldn't be bothered to come out to my place, yet he'll drive the same amount of time to get to this bar. He says he misses me, and was even asking what I was doing tonight. I said I didn't make any plans... and we talked about other stuff for a while, then I just asked him, so are you going to the bar tonight? and he's like yeah I'm gonna call so-and-so to see what he's doing.. and then I said Okay, then I'm gonna call up some friends, so bye. And I basically hung up on him. I'm so mad and hurt. I just talked to him a few days ago about how we hardly see/talk to each other. I asked if he was still into me and he said yes, he definitely is. But then if he wants to see me, shouldn't he make plans with me? So what is this about?? To make things worse, one of my friends (who has a crush on me and wants me to date him) came over last night to hang out and was like, "If he likes you so much, where is he now? Why isn't he here with you??" That hurt a lot mostly cuz it's true. I want to break up with him, but I'm just so unbelievably hurt. I feel like I'm going to be alone forever and I see all my friends with great guys and I cry and cry.. I have been crying all night and I can't stop, I'm just so sick of feeling hurt and misery over guys. Please help me, I'm feeling so depressed.. he said he would call me tomorrow and I'm thinking about just ending it when he calls rather than sticking around and getting more hurt..